Flowers

Macedonia 

The flowers are in a pot. They'll probably last one day.

Maybe a week.

Boy, it would be nice if they would grow back back.

You know, like perennials do.

I said, "striking." 

The girl didn't know what I meant.

"Striking."

     "Huh?"

"Striking."

     "Pretty."

"Visually striking." 

     "Yeah, pretty." 

They're not pretty. They're visually striking. They're the opposite of pretty. They're militaristic. Like a military ribbon, or a military medal. A parade sash. They are an assault on the eyeballs. They are a dramatic landing pattern for flying insects. They shout, "LOOK AT ME!" They swear at you . They dare you to look. They dare you to cut them. 

They'd look good in my apartment for about a week.

When a country uses this pattern and this choice of colors for their flag they are telling the world that want to be taken seriously. 

For example, the state flag for Hawaii signals the island people wish to be taken seriously. It doesn't look like Hawaii at all. 

Say, you were to design your own flag for Hawaii. What would you put on it? 

Maybe a unicorn. A few coconuts. A pineapple. A surfer. But no. They're serious over there. 

WTF? 

Hawaii is the only U.S. state to include a foreign flag in its own flag. I take that as giving the US the finger even as it incorporated into a state. They had a discussion about this. They made this choice. They're not dumb. They did this on purpose. They had some idea in mind. What a bunch of ingrates. I cannot imagine a flag any more overtly offensive. Except an American state flag with a communist emblem in it. The British came over here to kick our asses twice. Solidly. Burned down our brand new capital in fact. Dolly Madison saved early portraits from the burning capitol. Not like H. Clinton stealing tableware because she felt entitled to them. Yet the Hawaiians include the British in their state flag as remnant homage to their earlier history. How offensive!

Ew, that makes me so mad. It makes me want to give up Hawaiian punch permanently. 

Wait. 

I already did that.

Well, it makes me want to buy my pineapples from the Philippines instead. 

Wait. 

We already do that.

Well, that does it then. It makes me want to give up surfing permanently. 

Wait. 

That was a total blow out. 

Okay, fine. It makes me want to stay cross with their stupid ass flag for the rest of my life even though it's 100% irrelevant to me. 

No wait. That hurts me more than it hurts them.

Okay, fine. It makes me laugh at their flag for being so stew-pud. And I'll never stop thinking it's funny and stupid. 

Maybe not so stupid as my flag for them, but still stupid.