Spineless prickly pear cactus

I wanted to replicate the cactus garden that I planted at my parent's previous house. I saw them while walking to an aquarium shop on Santa Fe Drive from Hampden nearly to Mississippi. And when I look back at that I must think, man, I sure did walk a lot.

No wonder my shoes wore out all the time.

I followed the railroad tracks as you do striding rail to rail. But now that would be impossible. The whole thing is remade for light rail and the regular rail traffic along side is much heavier. It's all fenced in. I don't think it's possible to walk along anymore, certainly not easy without police intervention. I don't know. Maybe it is easy. I haven't tried since then and it's changed a lot.

There were cactus all over the place. Wild stuff. Growing very poorly in the ballast between RR ties. Constantly being rattled and shredded wherever it grew too tall. Very poor specimens. Different types. My mind was filled with wonder.

And, ew, son of a bee hive whenever they stuck. And that happened often, whenever they're touched. Not the large thorns, rather, the hair-like spikes all around them. Nearly impossible to pick out. And so many! They really don't like to be touched. Woe to the creature that bites them.

I returned with a box and a few garden tools and the heaviest gloves I could find and I still got stuck digging them out. Their roots were the most pathetic things that I ever saw on a plant. I was doubtful the transplant would work.

I replanted them in the front of the house. They grew very well once replanted and tended. And this from a high school boy who didn't know what he was doing. Within a few seasons I realized they would get a lot more sun in the back so I transplanted them. They took to their new digs immediately. Very responsive plants with just a tiny bit of care. The brick wall behind them radiated heat onto them. I gave them Miracle grow. That was it. And, man, did they ever grow. To my surprise they produced the loveliest pure yellow flowers that lasted a long time. Then at each spot where a flower grew, an incipient useless fruit or a new cactus grew. Each ear had multiple new bumps. The cactus garden was amazing. Immediate results.

If you're a dope about plants then I recommend cactus. It's nearly impossible to go wrong.

I looked under "Colorado cactus" and found photos of the same type that matched the kind that I found on the RR tracks, then with the name I found them on Amazon and on eBay.

But there are also quite a lot of other types too.

It took a very long time to decide on the spineless type. Come on. No spines. They must be kidding. What kind of cactus is that? When you're looking for cactus then you're you're looking for trouble. I just couldn't accept cactus without spines. That removes all the hazard. It was a mental block. Cactus must have spines. Or it's something else, something non-cactus. Spines are the defining thing about cactus.

The original ones did not produce fruit that you can eat although they did produce fruit-like bumps that were not ears. These spineless type have red fruit that you can eat and yellow flowers and spineless Mickey Mouse ears. They're like a beautiful cat that's been de-clawed. A beautiful dog de-fanged. A gelding, a capon, a thing that should be able to deliver pain but cannot. I'm still not certain that I like them. They're eunuchs. Maybe they'll, uh, grow on me.

They're a lot bigger than the original type that I found on the RR tracks.

The 3 that I bought through eBay ↑.

Their flowers.

Their fruit.

I haven't a clue what to do with this fruit. I've never eaten one, that I know of. I'm not even sure mine will grow them. They're full-sun loving things and mine will get only partial sun.