Instant Denver omelet

Pathetic. 

Crap ham, crap cheese, crap vegetables. Scant amounts. Too much packaging. 

Only one egg. 

Microwave!

Aaarg.

That video made me sad.

Video chosen because it's the shortest.

Here's the thing. You can easily improve on the basics. Green bell pepper is just the worst. 

It's not ripe. 

And it's give no treatment to compensate for it not being ripe, such as roasting, as done with jalapeños and other green chile peppers. 

Green jalapeños are also not ripe. Mexican cooks know that green chile peppers must be charred. And that makes a world of difference. But Americans don't do that. Even as we know green vegetables are not ripe. 

For example: Denver Pizza uses fresh jalapeños that roast when the pizza is baked at high temperature. 

Other pizza places use marinated jalapeños that are too wet to roast and they carry a vinegar tastes. 

And there is no comparison between them. That one little thing wins the day. Denver Pizza knows what they are doing and all the other places are winging it. 

Unripe green chile peppers make you burp and fart. 

And when you plant their seeds they don't grow because the seeds are immature. 

The original Denver omelet idea is solid, but for improved Denver/western style omelet then try switching out the peppers for something more substantial. Something with flavor, and something treated properly by roasting. 

Use the best ham that you can get. Not the cheapest there is. 

If you used leftover Honey Baked ham, for example, your omelet will automatically be 10X better than regular cheap sandwich ham. 

And the cheese. Omg, everyone uses the cheapest cheese they can find. The cheese in the first video is the worst cheese possible. Like they don't even care.

I want to tell you little story.

Cheese made from pasteurized milk is a safety net for mass marketed cheese such as we have in the United States. To offer cheese from unpasteurized milk is a bit of a risk in America. Imported cheese that is unpasteurized must be held for some length of time before it can be sold. But that is where the real flavor is. 

What do we Americans want, our biomes of bacteria to be antiseptic? 

The balance of bacteria in our bodies is of vital importance, it's what makes us who we are, yet we want to narrow that down as much as possible to exclude nearly all contact with it. And I think that throws us off quite a bit.

Why are we so fussy? 

Our continuous fight against disease means killing everything even the good things that help us. So we end up with things such as gastronomical problems, I think because we exclude so much that could help us. 

Yesterday I asked the gorgeous young woman behind the cheese counter at Whole Foods what is her favorite cheese.

Oh man, I love these people so much.

When you ask that of a waiter or waitress in a no class having restaurant, they often say, "Oh, I don't know. I never eat here." Or, "I'm a vegetarian so my choices here are limited." Or, "I'm lactose intolerant, so I cannot have cheese." Or, "I have celiac, so no wheat for me." 

Or some crap that makes them just so special.

Conversely, when they do answer openly and helpfully, then it's the customer who rejects the suggestions for the above list of wearisome limiting reasons that make the customer feel just oh so special.

No, not the eggs, no, not the bacon, no, not the potato, no, not the bread, no, not the milk, no, not the coffee, no, not the orange juice, no, not the snails, no, not the potatoes, no, not the steak, no, not the pork and on and on and on so wearisomely. 

You're all just so f'k'n special. 

The woman thought. 

Apparently I posed a hard one. 

She said, "Here. I'll come around." 

z-i-i-i-i-i-p

She's standing next to me. We're scanning the array of cheese together. 

     'This is my number one favorite."

Soft brie type. Something I'd never pick.

I'm tempted to reject it because I always do.

But I did ask, and she did answer thoughtfully and considerately and honestly and openly. Genuinely. She answered my question. This is her actual favorite. 

Fine. I'l try it 

Thirty f'k'n dollars a pound! 

Goddamnit. 

I thought it said, "unpasteurized." I guess I was mistaken. 

She answered my question. I appreciate that. I'll step out of my safety zone and try her suggestion. I did ask. 

I think she was pleased that I threw it my cart. It means her suggestion is valuable. I think she is used to people rejecting suggestions and steering the discussion to their usual thing. I almost did. This is not what I was looking for. 

She suggested young parmesans in a pile but I already have a large chunk of that. 

She continued.

I really like this one too.

A hard cheese. Good. Wisconsin. Good.

$26.00 a f'k'n pound!

Goddamnit!

"You're a cheese elitist."

     "No, not really. I don't think so. Well. Maybe. Yeah."

She blushed.

     "Sometimes when I sit down I just want a really good cheese, and these two hit the spot. They really are very good."

This is the raw one. Raw milk. American-made and raw milk. That is unusual. 

Had I asked her which are her favorite raw milk cheeses, she'd have gone, boink, boink, boink, boink, boink and pointed them all out. 

She was looking for her third favorite. 

"I think I have enough. Thank you. You've been very helpful. Thank you for spending your time with me. I appreciate that."

And I do.

I'm eating this first cheese right now, and she's right. It is very good. 

It would probably be better with crackers. This apple is too sweet for this cheese. 

I bet it would be great with the sourdough bread. 

But I would not use it in a Denver/western omelet. It's too good for that. It's not right for that.

See, some cheese is too bad for an omelet. Like the cheese in the first video is just pathetic. And some cheese is too good for it. Like the type the WF young woman recommended for snacks. 

At any rate, up the game with each element, ham, vegetables and cheese, and the product is automatically improved. 

The microwave technique of mixing it all together is the absence of technique, not the brilliant use of technology. That whole egg mixture in a cup is just very sad.

The second video is excellent technique. Low heat and pushing up piles of gently cooked curd. That guy knows what he's doing. Although he kept it on the heat as he piled up the ingredients. The aim is to cook the eggs as little as possible. 

We could have an omelet party and blow everyone's mind. Honestly, we could whip out a pile of forty or so like a pro.

I did that a few times. 

And now I now much more than I did way back then. 

I'm not bragging. I'm describing. We could blow everyone's mind. Because nobody, and I mean nobody ever makes makes omelets with fantastic ingredients and fantastic technique. They just don't. I studied the experts and they are all wanting. And I still have people tell me, "The best omelet I ever tasted is the one you made at that party." I already blew their minds. A couple of times. People who travel and who know their omelets, and that was way back then before I knew what I was doing.

But I don't know how to mix drinks. Somebody else has to do that.