Fritz learns to catch

My dogs couldn't catch food in their mouths if their life depended on it 

I guess they just cannot track and calculate. 

And I can relate to that.

Every time we tried this game they put me back to five years of age. I simply could not calculate the speed of an approaching car. I could not trust the driver could see me since I could not see the driver. I could not trust they would not run me over on purpose. So if I saw a car then I'd have to wait. 

And I tried counting from the moment I saw them to the moment they passed, and then counting as I stepped across the road, to help calculate the next time. But nothing worked. Nothing. I simply could not judge distance and speed. I was trapped with my five-year-old brain. 

Just as my dogs were trapped with their dog brains and dog eyes, and their dog snouts blocking their view. 

I kept trying with the digs individually, and trying and trying and nothing worked. 

Except Cheez-Its. 

Those were aerodynamically slow enough and brightly orange enough to work. 

What joy! Catching Cheez-Its in their mouths. It made flicking Cheez-Its to my dogs as much fun as eating them myself. 

Until I had the large male for two weeks then a car trip to Atlanta then another week in Georgia. That dog was so bright about everything except catching Cheez-Its. He was just as inept as the 3 previous females. 

Plus he refused all food except dry dog food. 

Until Thanksgiving dinner when he stole the turkey leg off the plate as I carved it. 

Slice leg off, place it on the platter blur leg gone. 

Across the connecting room the dog appeared triumphantly as Rin-Tin-Tin behind the sofa facing us with a gigantic turkey leg in his mouth. 

Three full weeks the dog refused all human food until that last treacherous moment. 

I was so proud of him I could burst. 

"You win." 

     "Oh no. He can't have that." Toni and the rest of her guests leapt from the table and chased the dog throughout the whole house, up and down the stairs, back and forth, through the rooms, through the hallways, through the bedrooms, then downstairs, through the kitchen, the dining room, living room, back up the stirs, with Toni and her guests chasing him, through their legs, they chased, he out-maneuvered them but I did not participate. The dog would listen to me but I would not join the chase. He earned that turkey leg. Fine with me. I want him to have it. I was proud of him. I was on his side. I continued cutting the turkey and left the dog alone. 

I think they caught him and took the turkey leg away from him. Dangerous bones and all that nonsense. Thinking back on it makes me sad all over again. That was a truly a great dog. Toni was lucky to have him.