Border Security: America's Front Line

The show follows the action of Customs Border Patrol at Northern American airports. We see passengers picked out for secondary screening. Thing that you will notice: everyone lies.

They must hate that. Cops too. This must be a human trait to automatically lie when interrogated by people that you regard lower than yourself.

Over and over they say the same thing, "If you are lying then you are in trouble. If you tell the truth then I can help you. We found ______. Now is the time to start telling the truth."

The show is edited by an incurable schizophrenic.

Chopped to pieces then jumbled. At each point where they pick up a track they dropped earlier they backtrack and replay the previous ending thus stretching each episode with unnecessary redundant repetition that keeps repeating itself.

Who even does that?

GAWL!

And everyone's trying to bust some kind of move; sneak something in, bring in their stupid native food and all the bugs that come with it, their bizarre Middle Eastern drugs like khat, chemical drugs, money, gold, clothing, knock off goods. Every kind of fer'ner on earth making a move on good old Ewe Ess of Aye.

A lot of people are incredibly arrogant.

You start out thinking, "Aw, he didn't get through," and "Aw, she's being sent back." and "Aw, she lied about her months of pregnancy and they're both refused entry." And you end up thinking, "Good! Get the hell out of my country. All of you. Out!"

And the travelers from English speaking countries are the worst. They've all got some kind of game. They all come off as regarding America as their trailer park cousin where they go for their slumming.

While our CBP handles them with class sending them packing or passing them a gigantic fee.

And dogs! You could say they are working quite hard, but I seem them playing like mad. This is their best game ever! The thing they can do very well and get their rewards. You can tell that the dogs are having a blast. Their handlers are so sweet to them.

But the really weird thing is our lovely neighbors to the north. The ones that travel here, shown on this show, all think America is their little bitch. The first woman shown is perfectly obnoxious. She just cannot believe that she's getting the treatment. "This is all so unnecessary." She says repeatedly, "I'm may not be the usual Canadian" then, "I'm not the usual traveler" then, "I'm not the usual sixty-year-old." Bitch, you are a lot more common than you imagine yourself to be.

The agents are portrayed as very well centered. They really have seen it all and their patience  is remarkable with a steady stream of arrogant liars.

There is also a Canadian version of this show that ran into some controversy. It picked up protestors complaining about intrusion into privacy. Viewers did not like what they saw about their own Canadian Customs and Border Patrol. The issue went all the way to Parliament. Wikipedia explains.

American episodes.