I was just now looking for something different to watch on Netflix and stopped on The Catch. Right off, within the first minute, they show young people are needed to pick up the dangerous trade of ocean fishing. A twenties-something man looks at the camera and says, "What do I know about fishing? Nothing."
That's one of the first grade-school jokes that heard in Spanish.
Que hace una pez?
(Shrug shoulders) Nada.
What does a fish do?
Nothing / it swims.
An elementary double entendre. One time I told this joke to two guys and one of them goes, "That's a stupid children's joke. And your accent sucks." He didn't like me.
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Care to hear the craziest karma anecdote ever?
I keep hearing on the Christian channels when I pause on them and give them a few minutes during their begging sessions extolling their viewers to donate money to them because through God's mysterious ways you're always repaid abundantly.
Such nonsense.
Last Friday I sent off a card with a fairly expensive certificate for brewing sessions downstairs. I had to really think about this. So much room for it to go awry. This was to patch damaged friendships, frankly. After the brewing lesson they take home 10 gallons of beer. I did it before and it worked out very well, but it was still an unusual thing to do. Nobody spends that much for Christmas present for a fairly remote friend.
Then today I opened a Christmas card from another out-of-state person unconnected with the one just mentioned, and even more remote, that contained two Amazon gift certificates that equaled the exact amount that I paid. For a net difference of zero.
And my mind was blown. Just a bit spooky. Nothing like this happened before. There is no way to predict such a thing. I don't even know how to respond, except to say thank you.
Ecclesiastes 11English Standard Version (ESV)
Cast Your Bread upon the Waters
11 Cast your bread upon the waters,
for you will find it after many days.
2 Give a portion to seven, or even to eight,
for you know not what disaster may happen on earth.
3 If the clouds are full of rain,
they empty themselves on the earth,
and if a tree falls to the south or to the north,
in the place where the tree falls, there it will lie.
4 He who observes the wind will not sow,
and he who regards the clouds will not reap.
Why did the cowboy sit backward on his horse?
Because he was a horseback rider.
Strange things happen. Twice now, the one whose heritage links back to the One whose Name cannot be spoken outloud, has spoken up in this forum to say how much he has missed the voices of women who've commented and posted at Lem's and twice now those voices have returned in stronger presence as a result.
Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."
What does a Chevy II do?
Nova.
I forgot that one.
Nova was my older Brother's first car. He love that thing with a love that was pure. He was one with that car, attuned to its every nuance. He'd go, "Hear that?"
"Hear what?"
"That's not right."
The next red light, he'd pop the hood, jump out and adjust something with a screwdriver. Then return before the light changed green, satisfied that he fixed the thing that sounded wrong to him.
I owned one briefly. Patched the rusted out quarter panels with fiberglass cloth and bondo, the holes in the floor were covered with sheets of aluminum I screwed down to what solid steel remained in the floor pan, I used a can of spray paint to cover my work, and I tripled my money on that investment.
I used to have a Saab 96 that would backfire - and when it did that the carburetor would catch fire. I was trying to sell it, it backfired, I had the potential buyer pop the hood, I put out the fire, closed the hood and the guy bought it anyway. People in Fort Collins loved their Saabs.
And that, my friends, is today's Saab story.
I had a bright red Subaru in the 70's (made by Fugi Heavy Industries!) that would blow a fuse and entire car would STOP RUNNING. How that design feature passed inspection amazes me to this day. I kept a pill bottle of fuses in the glove box and would have to hop out where ever it would coast to a halt, pop the hood and change the fuse, and it would be good to go for another few months. There's be no clue when it was about to happen. I really liked that car, and ended up duct taping black plastic garbage bags over the holes in the floorboards in the back seat. My brother bought it from me, holes and all, kept it running for several more years.
"Because he was a horseback rider."
Yours is better than the answer in the kids' joke book:
Because he wanted to see where he'd been.
Because he was looking for a pony in the poop was my guess.
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