8Greens

There must be a million superfood products. Here are 25 of them with incredibly long descriptions of each. Some of them are only one ingredient, like wheatgrass juice powder, or spirulina, whatever that is, ashwagandha root powder, which is just an exotic name for withania somnifera, which is just another exotic name for poison gooseberry or winter cherry, a Solanaceae, which is a fancy name for nightshade; tomatoes, potatoes, eggplant, chili peppers and tobacco. Come on! Some of them are from a plant you never heard of from Hawaii. Others are ordinary like yeast. The apparent best ones are a combination of greens like 8Greens, except powder form that I suppose is mixed with water or used as powder in other recipes.

8Greens is distinguished from the rest by being the only powder compressed into tablet form with a trace of baking soda along with the natural acids and a binder that is also a sweetener to form a fizzy tablet. The tablet dissolves in bubbling action.

They're lauded as sugar free, but with another non-sugar sweetener, over and over we hear "sugar free, sugar fee, sugar free," even as the inventor, who looks a bit like Ann Coulter, sometimes mixes the drink with vodka.

Gawl, a health supplement with vodka.

That's my kind of gal.

The tablets are made from real greens.

I would really appreciate a video on green tablet production.

I need to see bushels of various greens dehydrated, processed to dust and and compressed into tablets.

I visualize a gigantic dehydrator loaded with bushels of greens that moves to a giant coffee bean mill that turns all the dry leaves to dust, with snow shovels adding artificial sweetener and baking soda, that moves to giant garbage compressor that punches out pills along a conveyer belt, that get shaken into stacks and slipped into little plastic tubes on their own conveyer.

The fizzy tablets are made from:
spinach
wheatgrass
kale
blue green algae
spirulina
aloe vera
chlorella
barley grass

Bring it. I'm all for algae and seaweed and kelp. I have 3 kinds around here and I use them a lot. They're delicious; nori, kombu and wakame. All three are excellent.

I made these flattened triangular rice balls called onigiri stuffed with teaspoon of ordinary tuna salad and wrapped in paper-like nori seaweed and the whole idea sounds flat and unappealing, and they're not attractive, but together they are compellingly excellent and a guy could get fat eating all that white rice.

Check 'em out if you like. 

The fizzy tablets contain the equivalent of:

6 cups spinach

15 cups broccoli

7 cups milk 

6 oranges

One tablet goes in 8oz of water. 

I bought one these tubes to try them out. 

What am I crazy? 

I don't want that many vegetables, milk and fruit all at one time. What kind of pig would eat that much broccoli?

The pills have a line impressed in the center so they can be snapped in half.

I used half a tablet in 1 pint of water for very diluted fizzy drink.  Twice. So one pill for 1 quart of water. 

They taste okay. Dey augh'ight. 

I don't know if I'll buy them again. I'll see how it goes. The pills can be mixed with any recipe that takes water. I could add a tablet to bread, to rice, potatoes, pot roast, salad dressing, cereal, oatmeal, cornbread, zucchini bread, anything. I could drop one in the coffee bean mill and use it as powder, sprinkle it into  meatloaf, into biscuits, into miso, into any soup. Whatever. Limited only by imagination. 

But if all that it does is darken my urine then pffffft there goes another health supplement. 

The cost is 1.20 - 1.40 a tablet, depending on where you buy them plus shipping. Less if you buy a box of six tubes. 10 tablets per tube.