Thursday, June 5, 2014

Obama's next trade


The next big White House deal was revealed today, already in the works, the details having been sorted months ago. Bypassing Congress and the usual channels through various commissions, the deal tentatively called "The Big Wham-O"  is to be carried out before the dust settles on the recent trade of five top Taliban fighters for one Army deserter, and before opposition can balance themselves from reeling through a series of previous administration scandals too large and too numerous to list that would derail any previous non-racial administration. The idea is to keep opposition Republicans flailing hopelessly and making them appear hapless, ineffectual, confused, acting from anger and utterly hopeless. The plan involves characterizing opposition as "just more of the same old Washington nonsense we see too often and come to expect."  

The next deal involves trading all the remaining Guantánamo prisoners clearing the place out for five billion in reparations paid directly to the Taliban over a ten year period ignoring official Afghanistan government seen as too corrupt to do business with, thus, "killing two birds with one stone, as it were" according to an unnamed high-level official*  Speaking under anonymity the source elaborated, "the first trade was a test run to see how far the White House can go without collapsing, and now having ridded Guantánamo of the worst of U.S. captives held at Guantánamo, the rest will be easy-peasy lemon squeezy." Thus after having been thwarted by opponents his first five years in office Obama can finally fulfill one of his chief campaign promises and secure his historic legacy in his own way by his own methods.

* A house wren that lands on my terrace railing and speaks to me in my mind. 

7 comments:

chickelit said...

Does that bird tweet?

Chip Ahoy said...

No, it talks with its mind. But it did cause me to tweet.

William said...

It's pleasant to think that this is all part of a Machiavellian scheme whose details are not, at this time, known to the public. But the most simple and reasonable explanation is stupidity........I'm for treating Bergdahl and his family with kindness and charity. Accordingly, I think the best thing that Obama could have done would be to keep them out of the spotlight. The father certainly wasn't ready for his close up.

Chip Ahoy said...

OT.

Last night I awoke within a dream with a new Belgian puppy. She was walking the edge of my fifth-floor apartment. The architecture is different than it is in real life, a long terrace without any railing. Something below caught the dog's attention and she stepped off to pursue it and fell to the ground level messing up her little bones inside her body.

I became distraught and questioned myself harshly. How could I bring a dog into the city like that? Why was I willing to endanger the dog like that? Why was I willing to pay $50.00 each month just to have a dog? How was I to get the dog to the veterinarian when I cannot even pick her up? How can I be so thick about having a dog? Why am I so bad and unthinking? I raced to ground level and tried to hold the dog and pull her body next to mine and both of us just lay there together but I couldn't even touch her without hurting her. I couldn't even touch her head without her yelping in pain. Her fur felt soft as feathers and she was not yet fully grown and I hadn't even had her for one single day. I felt like shit. So badly that I snapped awake again and for good in real life, immensely grateful that didn't actually happen, and I mean grateful! Grateful my building really isn't made like that, the terrace is actually safe, and I'm not so thick as to have a dog downtown where there is no place for her to run freely as she must. Grateful I have more sense than if led by my heart.

And that caused me to begin emptying out my storage. It made me finally aware that paying $40.00 a month for convenient storage for things I have no intention of ever using again is unacceptable. In fact, I show signs of the type hoarding that I abhor. I don't have to clear it all at once, I can take a full month, but I decided on a plan to clear it in stages and today was step one.

I threw things away. Good things with possible future uses. And I started a pile to donate. Eventually, and probably more quickly than I expect, the whole thing will be cleared. Including clothes and other things inside my apartment besides.

And that is one way how dreams directly affect my real life.

edutcher said...

5 bil in reparations?

To the people who helped set up 9/11?

That really is treason.

Michael Haz said...

It could happen.....

deborah said...

Sometimes a Belgian puppy is just a Belgian puppy. You have the most vivid dreams, Chip. I could give you a run for your money, but yours are slightly more imaginative and bizarre, like the time you stepped over the Downs Syndrome girl saying beep beep.

I wish you could get a dog. I'm not kidding when I say poodles are one of the very best dogs (I prefer the miniatures, I think that's the size.) Standards are too big for my taste.

I know what great dogs they are as I had one as a teen.

Are you not a cat person?