Tuesday, May 22, 2018

Lawrence, stop the hammering.

Old. But who cares? It brings joy.



The Trump faces that people find and select to use is the thing that cracks me up so hard. I've looked for Trump faces myself, quite a lot actually, I'm something of an expert on what is available on Google images. I've seen all these faces before from their source pics and it kills me seeing what people do with them. In my disabling hysterics, that is the thing that's so funny. Thank you, Person Who Did This, you are tremendously funny. 

In Photoshop circles the kids will remark, "Seamless." Meaning humor derived from slipshod Photoshopping skills that make no effort to blend, resize properly, adjust white balance, adjust color tones to match, ignoring all that so the faces look like they're cut from a magazine and those adjustments are not possible. When the subject is President Trump that is literally side-splittingly funny. Because Trump actually makes those faces. For us to use. Trump's plastic face evokes an enduring fondness for him. His expressions are fantastic. Open. Brilliant. Disarming. And comical. 

I love laughing this hard. 

It's the antidote to the perfect bitch of growing old. 

I'm learning. Part of growing old is learning to develop generosity to young people, to turn resentment to fondness. I had to ditch that old microwave and it is heavy. Here I have a way to measure loss of physical strength. I could pick it up twelve years ago. Now  I cannot. I can no longer lift the microwave up to shoulder height. Son of a bitch! What a dreadful realization. I say to the youngsters working around here, "I'll give you ten dollars to help me throw this microwave into the dumpster." They work here. For us. They're already paid to help us. All I have to do is leave the microwave outside my front door, and they are already paid to carry it off. But I want to be generous with them one-to-one. I want them to receive generosity from an oldster. I want to affect their opinion of us. So I take it down myself and position the cart next to the dumpster and say to the group of three young men, "I'll give you ten dollars to help me lift this microwave into the dumpster. They're eager to help for nothing. They're already paid. But I want them to have a bonus. One of them is ahead of the rest. He doesn't need any help, he simply picks it up and tosses it into the dumpster. That happens to be empty CRASH. I hand him a twenty.

"Sir, you don't have to do this."

"I do. Take this, please. You relieved a great burden from my mind."

"Thank you." 

This is what getting old means. I think.  

And laughing so hard like this at this ridiculous video, to the extended point that you're helpless, turns you back into a child. 

9 comments:

Dad Bones said...

As Larry the Cable Guy would say, "That's funny. I don't care who you are."

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

LOL. Where's that hammer?

XRay said...

That was funny... just one more instance of his being just 'one of the guys' at some level.

MamaM said...

Trump's plastic face evokes an enduring fondness for him. His expressions are fantastic. Open. Brilliant. Disarming. And comical.

That's why the turn of putting his face on the Queen works so well. She appeared resplendent in chartreuse and purple at the Royal Wedding, and sour as a lime.

Amartel said...

Hilarious. O'Donnell has always been such a self-indulgent, self-important prick.
Look how abusive he is to the underlings. I guarantee that they all hate him.
I remember way back when he tried to intimidate Cathy Seipp (anyone else remember her?) by yelling at her and his face turned all red with veins a'poppin' and bulging. She barely acknowledged his emotional manipulation. It was awesome. I can't remember the forum or I'd dial it up and provide a link.

Chip Ahoy said...

Neck veins.

Amartel said...

That's it!
(Ewwwwwwww.)

XRay said...

Yes, but I only remember the name, 'Cathy Seipp'. Why do I remember her name?

XRay said...

She did a comic strip?