OH NO GODZILLA IS COMING!!!!!!!

"Oh no Mr Burr Godzilla is coming and he has the Chinky Flu"
"WHAT? Fuck that shit. I survived AIDS and spent ten years in a wheelchair and I be damned if I let the Hop Sing Crud get me. Get the fuck out of my way I am flying back to Key West."
"So sorry Mr. Burr but Godzilla is Japanese not Chinese."
"Iceberg Goldberg I don't give a shit. Get me a ticket to get the fuck out out of here you sushi sucking slant."
"So sorry Mr Trump say no airplanes from infected areas. You shit out of ruck whitey."
"Thank God I am dead already so this doesn't make any sense."

Florida Man is Lucky To Be Alive

"Rutledge is a truck driver from Orlando, Fla. He was on his way to Indiana with a delivery when this week’s winter storm hit."

About 6 a.m. Monday, after the snow passed, Rutledge was staying at a truck stop in Whiteland. His brakes were frozen, so he went under the truck to fix them. That’s when the truck shifted in the snow.

“It caught my left side and my left arm was pinned by the axle of the truck,” Rutledge said.

He was stuck in below-zero temperatures, unable to move.

“I wound up being frozen to the pavement in the snow,” Rutledge said. “As I got colder and colder, I was yelling but nobody could hear me.”

That’s where that miracle – or maybe something more – came in.

What is the lesson? Never go under the cab without a Bluetooth. Which you may buy using our Amazon portal, at no extra cost to you, while supporting this blog's contributors. Thanks.