Sunday, February 2, 2014

Place Your Bets

Alright, you gambling degenerates, it's time to place your bets on the outcome of the Super Bowl.  Since Lem doesn't want to go to prison hasn't enabled the gambling option on his blog,  we'll just do this by poll.  Bets have to be placed before kickoff.  Make you reasoning known in the comments.

Winning Team  The point spread is 2.5 points.

Who Will Win The 2014 Super Bowl?





  
pollcode.com free polls  
 Over/Under  The Over/Under is 47.5 Points

I Bet The Over/Under



  
pollcode.com free polls 

The 17 Most Ridiculous Bets Of This Year's Super Bowl

There are actual betting lines for these events.

Seventeen.  What kind of hat will Bruno Mars wear during the half-time show?  Fedora is such a heavy favorite that you have to bet $100 to win $66. It’s for good reason too. Bruno Mars showing up without a fedora is like Peyton Manning taking the field without a helmet or Joe Buck going live without a can of Aquanet holding his hair in place. It’s possible Mars could rock a fur hat (11/2) or a tuque (5/1), but the “wears no hat” option at 5/2 is absurd.

Sixteen.  Will Richard Sherman get a taunting penalty?  The odds are 4:1 on Yes.  Two weeks ago, maybe. But after his Super Bowl week conversion to NFL statesman, there are better odds Sherman plays a down wearing Bruno Mars’ fedora.

Fifteen.  Coin Toss - heads or tails?  Even.  RJ Bell of Pregame.com says this is the most popular prop bet of the Super Bowl because it’s easy to understand for people who don’t know much about point spreads and over/unders. “There’s also a perversity to it,” he said, “and it’s a topic of conversation.” Plus, bettors like a little action before the game even starts.

Fourteen.  Peyton Manning total passing yards over/under 289.  If coin toss is the most popular novelty, the yardage for the game’s most popular player is always one of the biggest on-field props. Manning threw for over 289 yards in 14 of 18 games this season. Of course, he wasn’t playing the Seahawks defense in any of those.

Thirteen.    Even.  Will the player who scores the first touchdown have a jersey number above or below 79.5?  You’ll push if a player wearing No. 79.5 scores first.

Twelve.   2,500:1.  Seattle or Denver to score exactly two points.  Since the merger, a team has scored exactly two points in a game eight times. But two of those games happened in the past 24 months. I’m just saying.

Eleven.    20:1.  Red Hot Chili Peppers to announce that they have renamed themselves Chili Peppers during the show.  This is a weather related bet, obviously.  Novelty props are easy to bet and the limits on the wagering (often as low as $50 on the quirkiest of props) invite light action.  There’s also another motive for setting ridiculous offerings, like the one above.  The word of mouth and viralness of these is an important consideration, the sports books are thinking if all these media outlets are talking about this, it’s free advertising.

How Did Everyone Else Miss This?

Richard "Duke" Wagner

The Duke explains what happened here in a chirbit:


Check this out on Chirbit

 h/t: Ron at Ambiance

Hey Hey Hey, The End Is Near!


Here's my lovely friend Tim , performing Joanna Newsom's song, "On A Good Day", over a period of 18 hours. I did editing and post-production work on the video.

Why is Amazon so secretive?

"[S]uppose you wanted to know not about the future, but about the present or even the past. About how, for instance, Amazon’s grocery delivery service is working out in the test markets, or how many Kindles have been sold. Surely this would be the easiest thing in the world for Amazon to answer, because, you know, it’s past. Apple is one of the most secretive companies in the world, but it will readily tell you how many iPhones and iPads it is selling.
But Amazon will not tell you any of this. Every quarter, the analysts get on the phone with Tom Szkutak, the chief financial officer, and pepper him with questions. But whether it is past, present or future, Mr. Szkutak ably dodges each query. Here were his replies Thursday:"
 
“I am sorry I can’t help you … you have to wait on that … In terms of the details, I can’t really give you a lot of color … you will have to stay tuned on that one … I can’t talk to the specifics of that … there is not a lot I can help you with there … I wouldn’t speculate what we would do or not do going forward … I wouldn’t speculate. We might or might not do in the future … if you look back at what we have done, you can’t expect that we might do [it] going forward … I wouldn’t want to speculate what they would or wouldn’t do related to pricing … it’s hard to tell, honestly. It’s hard to know … it’s very early … that’s really all I can say … I can’t comment.”
 
NYT All Quiet on the Amazon Front

WLEM AM

Where Woody Hayes would feel at home. 



The spread favors Denver over Seattle by 2.5, but keep in mind that three out of the four times the Broncos lost the Super Bowl, they were in orange jerseys, as they will be today.

Saturday, February 1, 2014

Valentine Day pop-up card with LED

The dread of finding the perfect card with the perfect picture expressing the perfect sentiment for a completely contrived holiday made up for the purpose of selling cards is matched by the dread of receiving one insouciantly picked up from the grocery store where often the best cards are found.

I'm here to help you make a pop-up card for you to give somebody. I'm here to help you discover your inner creative streak, and tap that bitch, I meant to say tap into your inner creativity, that's what I meant. I will show you step by step what I do, what works for me, what I get away with, what charms the pants right off people and executed so abruptly and crudely you'll go, "I can do better than that."

Apparently light emitting diodes originated in rocks. Or crystals in rocks with special properties when touched with electricity. That is irrelevant to our card but I found it interesting.







5mm LED -- eBay.
2032 3V batteries -- eBay
ream card stock, 250 sheets, 110LB -- Amazon
Glue
Ruler
Paint, either watercolor children's set or acrylic. 
tape

You have half a month to knock out a card. There are two things going on here, either one would make a decent card on its own or multiplied but they are combined here for added pop-uppery fun and for increased depth because we abhor flatness. Nothing actually pops up, rather a heart-shaped platform fails to fall down and two arms arc across the page for 45˚ but they do not actually lift off the page. You will see it is all tricks. 

No soldering. It would be better more solid all around with wires and solder but instead to keep this simple an arm will shove the battery between the anode and the cathode wires.  The arrangement forgoes a current-controlling resistor. It's a card after all, not an heirloom toy.

A paper band is created to set across the central fold of the card.

The band will be formed into a step.

The paper band is in the shape of a step when the card is half opened.

The paper band is flat when the card is fully opened.

Two crimps will be dented into the step.

The crimps close inward and open flatly with the band. The movement in the crimps made by opening/closing the card powers the arms that move paper hearts and a battery.

KLEM FM


This is the original, uncircumscribed version. The original was too long for AM radio airplay.

Superbowl Town Gets Ready (Open Thread)



Clean
 
Accessible

Secure

They Found My Favorite Cocktail Lounge

They are Esquire Magazine, and they named my favorite cocktail lounge as number one on their list of the top ten bars in America.

This is good for the owner of the lounge, but bad for the customers. I'm selfish, so it's bad for me, too.  Notoriety brings too much attention; too many curiosity seekers; too damn many college kids who don't know how to behave in a cocktail lounge with grown-ups around.

Bryant's Cocktail Lounge is in an old, quiet residential neighborhood in a working class part of the city.  My wife and I began stopping there for cocktails when we were in our twenties, long before we met.  It's dark inside, velour on the walls, a cozy bar,  and nooks with tables and chairs.  There is no jukebox.  The owner plays standards over a McIntosh music system that has knobs and red lights and VU meters.  There are no signs, neon or otherwise, and no television sets.  There is no food, no bar snacks, no sandwiches.  Just cocktails, period.

There are no beer tappers, a very odd thing for a joint in Milwaukee.  Order a beer and a bartender or waitress will politely remind you that Bryant's is a cocktail lounge.  There are no drink menus.  The bar has a rolodex with recipes for more than 400 cocktails.  If you don't know what you want, they'll pick out something for you.

Now Esquire "discovered" Bryant's and made this video about the place.



We stopped for cocktails last night about 10:30.  The manager warmly welcomed as usual, and two places at the bar opened in a few minutes. We had a couple of cocktails, then a couple more. And enjoyed precious time for a happy, long talk about whatever was on our minds; in a dark, quiet bar, Sinatra, Bennett, Holiday, Mercer, Dorsey and so many others quietly playing and singing in the background.

Things were normal, a comfort to those who love this place.  The Esquire video hasn't resulted in the place being mobbed.  Things are good.

If you are in town, stop at Bryant's on a Tuesday night around 6:00 PM.   I'll be sitting at the bar, enjoying a cocktail.  If you see me, you can buy me a drink.  I'm friendly like that.  If you don't see me, just leave a ten dollar bill with my name on it.  John the bartender will know what to do.

Guest Post: "wanted to share the good news"

I've mentioned that I'm on a brand new drug therapy for Hep C. It's called Sovaldi, and it looks like it's gonna be a miracle drug. It's incredibly expensive unless you have good insurance, which I do for now.

I've had this virus for 36 years. After my transplant in 2006, my viral load doubled. I guess the little bastards saw the new liver as a buffet and started fornicating like rabbits. Anyway, viruses are incredibly small, so small that one ml of my blood contains about 1,300,000 copies of the virus - at least it did. After being on this drug for 2 weeks (one pill a day) I had my blood tested and got the news today. My viral count dropped to 114/ml. I'm in week 4 now, and probably have entirely eliminated it from my blood.

This incredible drug does this with zero side effects and no drug interactions. A true miracle invention. I will be taking it for 24 weeks if my insurance approves it for that long. They have so far. They have good reason to balk at just under $1000 per pill. I pay , not even a copay. I know, crazy isn't it? It has a 70% cure rate so far for people with my genotype which is the most common and hardest to eliminate. I'm very optimistic. This virus acts extremely slowly, but causes cancer eventually, first in the liver, but later lymphomas and others too.

If I get cured of this after 36 years, I'll be fucking stoked. I've spent so much time, energy and misery fighting it and it's effects for so long. I suppose if I do get a cure, I'll get hit by a bus the next day.

Anyway, I'm just as pleased as a boy can be, and wanted to share the good news. Have a great weekend all. I know I will.

Commenter Bagoh20

"You know what the best predictor of future behavior is? Past behavior."

Excerpts of a National Review editorial "Wrong on Principles".

"The way to do enforcement first would be to pass enforcement bills and leave it at that. If the Senate passes them and the president signs them and subsequently enforces them after they survive legal challenge, well, then you have enforcement first. But everyone knows that none of this would happen — such bills wouldn’t pass the Senate, or even get a vote if Harry Reid had anything to say about it. And even if they did and the president signed them, no one can have any confidence that he would enforce them."

"For some reason, House Republicans have fastened on eventual citizenship as the key issue. It isn’t. What will matter most to the illegal population is getting legalized. The experience of the 1986 amnesty was that most formerly illegal immigrants didn’t take advantage of the opportunity to become citizens. And it is the legalization itself that will act as a magnet to new illegal immigrants. They will take notice that we eventually welcome anyone who manages to come here to live and work in defiance of our laws."

This post title quote is a line from the movie Side Effects (2013), now streaming on Netflix.

WLEM AM

Where we aim to please.



Free Will Astrology by Rob  Brezsny
horoscopes for week of January 30, 2014

Aries (March 21-April 19)

On my fifteenth birthday, I finally figured out that eating dairy products was the cause of my chronic respiratory problems. From that day forward, I avoided foods made from cow's milk. My health improved. I kept up this regimen for years. But a month ago, I decided to see if my long-standing taboo still made sense. Just for the fun of it, I gave myself permission to gorge on a tub of organic vanilla yogurt. To my shock, there was no hell to pay. I was free of snot. In the last few weeks, I have feasted regularly on all the creamy goodies I've been missing. I bring this up, Aries, because I suspect an equally momentous shift is possible for you. Some taboo you have honored for a long time, some rule you have obeyed as if it were an axiom, is ripe to be broken. 


Taurus (April 20-May 20)

Psychologist Daniel Kahneman, who won a Nobel Prize in Economics, says that consulting experts may be useless. In his study of Wall Street traders, he found their advice was no better than information obtained by a chimpanzee flipping a coin. Meanwhile, psychologist Philip Tetlock did a 20-year study with similar results. He found that predictions made by political and financial professionals are inferior to wild guesses. So does this mean you should never trust any experts? No. But it's important to approach them with extra skepticism right now. The time has come for you to upgrade your trust in your own intuition. 


Gemini (May 21-June 20)

I'm a big fan of logic and reason, and I urge you to be, too. Using your rational mind to understand your experience is a very good thing. The less stock you put in superstitious head trips and fear-based beliefs, the smarter you will be. Having said that, I recommend that you also make playful use of your creative imagination. Relish the comically magical elements of your mysterious fate. Pay attention to your dreams, and indulge in the pleasure of wild fantasies, and see yourself as a mythic hero in life's divine drama. Moral of the story: Both the rational and the fantastical approaches are essential to your health. (P.S. But the fantastical needs extra exercise in the coming weeks.) 


Cancer (June 21-July 22)

Sorry, Cancerian, you won't be able to transform lead into gold anytime soon. You won't suddenly acquire the wizardly power to heal the sick minds of racists and homophobes and misogynists. Nor will you be able to cast an effective love spell on a sexy someone who has always resisted your charms. That's the bad news. The good news is this: If you focus on performing less spectacular magic, you could accomplish minor miracles. For example, you might diminish an adversary's ability to disturb you. You could welcome into your life a source of love you have ignored or underestimated. And you may be able to discover a secret you hid from yourself a long time ago. 


Leo (July 23-August 22)

Cosmopolitan magazine is famous for offering tips on how to spice up one's sex life. Here's an example: "Take a few of your favorite erotically appealing flavor combinations, like peanut butter and honey or whipped cream and chocolate sauce, and mix up yummy treats all over your lover's body." That sounds crazy to me, and not in a good way. In any case, I recommend that you don't follow advice like that, especially in the coming days. It's true that on some occasions, silliness and messiness have a role to play in building intimacy. But they aren't advisable right now. For best results, be smooth and polished and dashing and deft. Togetherness will thrive on elegant experiments and graceful risks. 


Paula, I am impressed with your father.

Leo: Manuel, for you to be on our crew, you have to cut it between 2 and 3 seconds. We'll see if you can be part of our team.

boss: How long have you been in the United States? 

Leo: Since I was two.

boss: I came here eleven years ago. To the United States, you know, I got my green card, I just got my citizenship last year.

Leo: Oh nice.

boss: Have you thought about citizenship in the United States? That's really important to…

Leo: Oh no, yeah. 

boss: Because that was really important for my family

Leo: Nice.

boss: We have two boys and we knew it was very important to get citizenship.

Leo: I got one daughter.

boss: How old?

Leo: Six.

boss: Six?

Leo: Yeah.

boss: Are you going to have more children?

Leo: No. A matter of fact, I adopted. 

boss: Oh really, you adopted? Ooooh!

Leo: She was two yeas old. 

boss: What's your daughter's name?

Leo: Paula.

The video is cued to the segment with Leo. It is the full episode of Undercover Boss, USA Chiquita Brands. I am deeply impressed with this individual, a manager who supervises the lettuce harvest. Later in the show his humanity is truly humbling. The team works with a cleaning and packing machine. The field supervisor is talking to his boss. This portion seems a bit staged, Leo must know this is not an average field worker, but it drives the point very well. They could not have chosen a better person to represent. 

As represented these are the people I welcome. I do not understand why Leo has not pursued U.S. citizenship, it seems the reasonable thing to do. It seems like he wants it, and could attain it with or without help. I do not see the problem. Exactly where is the problem? 

Paul Ryan the strongest supporter for a path toward legalization appears to have been possessed of change of heart somehow. Some pressure from parts unknown. 

But business is still saying:
Bullshit. It never stops. Cheapskate profiteers. Unpatriotic. Such caterwauling.  Collectively they have the resources to train whoever they want for whatever they want. So do it and shut up. Apparently they need to be made to train their own employees themselves or pay for it themselves. Or else wait patiently until they come along in the right numbers to suit them. Provide the education they keep saying they require and stop bending the rules all over the place to the tremendous disadvantage of the nation's working class. Step up and take responsibility and help shape the society they say that they want. 

They make themselves less sympathetic too when it comes to the bizarre 99% VS 1% talk about just taking their boats and their planes and their watches that can buy a six-pack of Rolexes. It is not possible to protect ALL of your houses and all your vehicles and all your possessions all at once, you know. There needn't be any broken crystal to throw you overboard.

There may be something for Leo and for immigrant techs as far as expedited pathways to citizenship, just make sure you do not stick it to American workers. Again.