Not the Onion: North Korea bans sarcasm

"....because Kim Jong-un fears people only agree with him ‘ironically’"

North Korea has forbidden people from making sarcastic comments about Kim Jong-un or his totalitarian regime in their everyday conversations.

“One state security official personally organised a meeting to alert local residents to potential ‘hostile actions’ by internal rebellious elements,” a source in Jagang Province told Radio Free Asia’s Korean Service.

“The main point of the lecture was ‘Keep your mouths shut.’”

Officials told people that sarcastic expressions such as “This is all America’s fault” would constitute unacceptable criticism of the regime.

“This habit of the central authorities of blaming the wrong country when a problem’s cause obviously lies elsewhere has led citizens to mock the party,” an anonymous source said.

Another mocking expression, “A fool who cannot see the outside world,” was also said to be circulating in the totalitarian state, referring to the country’s notoriously isolationist leader.

The phrase was apparently conceived when officials voiced shock that Mr Kim did not attend celebrations held in Russia and China to mark the end of the Second World War.

"Sarcasm poses problem for computer algorithms in US election"

"Yeah right!"

When the U.S. Supreme Court upheld same-sex weddings in the same week that South Carolina debated keeping a controversial Civil War battle flag, Twitter user @xTomatoez posted “Gay marriage and the Confederate flag going down everywhere. Tough week for your redneck uncle on Facebook.”

The poster had no idea his tweet was one of many scrutinized by an analytics firm, whose algorithm took his mocking message seriously and decided it was negative toward gay marriage.

“They are by far the biggest stumbling blocks to trying to understand true sentiment in social media,” said Michael Meyers, managing partner of TargetPoint Consulting in Alexandria, Virginia. His firm, like many, is trying to tweak algorithms in-house now before the campaign season kicks into high gear.

Consider phrases like “sure it is,” “boo-hoo,” or “I’m shocked.” Given the proper context, most people can accurately size up their sincerity. But not a computer algorithm.

Ok people. Lets try to help the computers by not being too sarcastic. Curb your sarcasm.

"The Secret Service wants software that detects social media sarcasm"

"In a work order posted online Monday, the agency said it wants analytics software that can, among other things, synthesize large sets of social media data and visually present that data. The request for proposals was first reported by nextgov.com."

More specifically, the orders ask for a long list of specific tools, including the ability to identify social media influencers, analyze data streams in real time, access old Twitter data and use heat maps. And it wants the software to be compatible with Internet Explorer 8. (The agency is asking for a blanket purchasing agreement over a five-year period, which shows just how often the government updates its technology.)

Then there's the request to sift through the heaps of snark on Twitter and other social media services: "Ability to detect sarcasm and false positives," the request reads.