This is Lem's Levity

 

The name of this blog is of course Lem's Levity. But we haven't seen Lem in a while. He posts occasionally in the new beef joint but he doen't hang out with his old friends.

It's like he cut us or something. Just sayn'

KLEM FM

Overheard:  "Everybody is right and nobody is wrong ;)"

FWIW:

Rookie Hazing

I knew it would happen.

Since I'm the rookie on Lem's plantation, I've been told to review all the purchases made through the Amazon Portal last month and issue gracious and fulsome words of appreciation for your providing Lem with Cheetos money thoughtfulness.  I'd better hop to it before the Lemster goes all Incognito on me.

*Opens and reviews list of purchases provided by Amazon*

It's probably best to do this without naming the guilty mentioning the names of the people who you'd never imagine would buy this stuff were careful Amazon shoppers in order to keep shit quiet protect their anonymity.

Hitachi Magic Wand and Attachments.  Several buyers.  One of them female

Vino Italiano Wine Making Kit.  Two buyers, both in Wisconsin

Doc Johnson Butt Plug For Men.  One buyer, eastern state

Haribo Sugarless Gummi Bears.  Many buyers, some also ordered item Christmas gift wrapped

Geiger Counter.  One buyer, California

Canned Unicorn Meat.  One buyer, Lake Country

Porcelain Gay Wedding Cake Toppers.  One buyer, California

Thomas Kinkade Painting.  Delivered to an Art Department at an east coast university

Deepak Chopra book.  One buyer, Utah

Bitter is The New Black.  One buyer, Madison

My Third Husband Will Be A Dog.  One buyer, Madison

Rubber Bulldozer Track.  One buyer, rural Wisconsin

Kenworth Stering Wheel With Skulls.  One buyer.  Picked up at warehouse

Pacemaker Synchronization Guide.  One buyer, New York

Dagobert Wooden Toilet Throne. One buyer, last name is "Archy"

Boobs, An American Obsession.  Multiple buyers.

Lem asked me to say thanks for the spare lunch and porn money your taking time to order things through the portal on his blog.  So, thanks very much!

For Lem, Who Seems Obsessed With Patrick Stewart