Showing posts with label Hiedi Cruz's Diary. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Hiedi Cruz's Diary. Show all posts

Saturday, March 26, 2016

Heidi Cruz's Diary



I don’t know if I should do this. Laura Bush called me up and said I should record my thoughts. She said she had contacted all of the potential first ladies and told them that it is very important that we record our thoughts during the campaign. That it was important for posterity. So I discussed it with the voices in my head and they voted six to two to do it. So I will start writing down my thoughts and dreams. All of them except for the ones with Cthulhu in it.

This was a really tough week for me. Donald Trump threatened to spill the beans about me. After someone took a shot at his wife Melania. It wasn’t us. It was this bimbo who used to work for Scott Walker before she got canned for being a jerkoff in Iowa. She was the one who tried to slut shame Melania. It was really unfair for Trump to blame Ted. Why doesn’t he blame Scott Walker? He was the first to quit like a pussy and try to derail Trump. He is from Wisconsin so you know he would do anything. Ted is above all of that. He is so straight. So rigid. Most of the time. Just not when it counts.  Trump got them twisted and he said he would rat me out. The only question is what he was talking about.