I saw this piece of . . . prose, I guess, for want of a better word . . . while reading a story at PJMedia about a sexual-harassment suit:
Alive Seminars and Coaching Academy began with a vision and a statement powerful. That as the declaration is made, the action is taken Which was done with love and passion. With that love and passion creating basic and advanced programs and Leaderships To prepare leaders both in their community, in their jobs and their homes Alive continues to thrive on our dedication and passion given to each individual person and that is why great doors continue to open in our walk. Always remember the change in me will change the world
That's from the website of the company being sued. Here it is, and it looks exactly as you'd expect it to look.
I've worked as a proofreader and copyeditor, and that's just fingernails-on-a-chalkboard for me. It's not even bad English, like the instruction sheet for a cheap Chinese gizmo. It's as if someone fed a bunch of New Age self-help books into one of the early AI writing programs, say mid-1980s, and this is what came out.
And the thing is, someone looked at this website, thought about it, and then decided to hire them and give them money.
(The picture at top is by Bruegel the Elder.)
9 comments:
Good one. I have done some proofreading, but I have never been an editor of any sort. Or type. Or font. That cited mess needs moar random capitalization and non-sequiturs - it is way too close to being cogent and comprehensible. OMG - the testimonials are funny, too! Great stuff.
Also, I like Northern European Renaissance art and ol' Elder was among the best. I also like the compare and contrast discussion of his two towers paintings. He was no nimrod, that's for sure!
Never eaten at a Panda Express. It looks like MSG on stilts. It seems to me to be one choice we could do without.
Newspeak. Hate it.
It's passive aggressive and fuzzy and filled with jargon and feelings and terrible grammar.
Whoever wrote that may have just come out of a "Be Less White" seminar or more likely never needed to attend.
Schizophrenics make more sense.
It looks like MSG on stilts
This falls under the old "Things are not as they seem" meme. When SonM, who has eaten there, told me they don't use MSG, I wasn't ready to take that as truth. Even with that claim backed up by this: "Panda Express’ suppliers aren’t permitted to add MSG to their ingredients, and no MSG is added to any of its food during preparation." I've yet to give it a try.' https://www.thedailymeal.com/eat/13-things-you-didn-t-know-about-panda-express-slideshow/slide-5.
I love the Babel story. The reversal or complement to that one from The Beginning is set out in the opening chapters of the book of Acts. When the Holy Spirit descends with the sound of a roaring wind to land like tongues of flame on the dejected disciples, everyone is able to hear what was said their own tongue.
Now there were staying in Jerusalem God-fearing Jews from every nation under heaven. When they heard this sound, a crowd came together in bewilderment, because each one heard their own language being spoken. Utterly amazed, they asked: “Aren’t all these who are speaking Galileans? Then how is it that each of us hears them in our native language? Parthians, Medes and Elamites; residents of Mesopotamia, Judea and Cappadocia, Pontus and Asia, Phrygia and Pamphylia, Egypt and the parts of Libya near Cyrene; visitors from Rome (both Jews and converts to Judaism); Cretans and Arabs—we hear them declaring the wonders of God in our own tongues!” Amazed and perplexed, they asked one another, “What does this mean?”
The same question asked then applies here.
Speaking of Mesopotamia, what goes around comes around - they named their city Ur and now that name is heard on the tongues of those who speak Textic every single day.
The result was also the opposite of what happened at Babel
Whoever made a place for his message in their hearts received the baptism; in fact, that day alone, about 3,000 people joined the disciples. The community continually committed themselves to learning what the apostles taught them, gathering for fellowship, breaking bread, and praying. Everyone felt a sense of awe because the apostles were doing many signs and wonders among them. There was an intense sense of togetherness among all who believed; they shared all their material possessions in trust. They sold any possessions and goods that did not benefit the community and used the money to help everyone in need. They were unified as they worshiped at the temple day after day. In homes, they broke bread and shared meals with glad and generous hearts. The new disciples praised God, and they enjoyed the goodwill of all the people of the city. Day after day the Lord added to their number everyone who was experiencing liberation.
In all my years of listening to preachers expound and explain, I can't say that I ever heard anyone link those two stories together, yet in my mind, they're a matched pair. The internet, however, turned up this link when I went looking to see if Breughel had painted something on the coming of the Holy Spirit!
https://www.breadforbeggars.com/2019/06/pentecost-reversals-and-the-tower-of-babel-by-peter-bruegel/
There I was off on my own tangent, interested in speaking my own language, and I almost missed clicking on the link provided which led to another paired set showing two different perspectives on Babel. Can't say which of the paintings I like better, appreciating seeing both together. Thanks for this quiet extra in the midst of the confusions of language that doesn't make sense, Mumpsimus.
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