Tuesday, May 31, 2016

URGENT

<ALERT>

I have been contacted by attorneys representing Lem.

Lem was taken into custody by federal agents earlier today as he was attempting to cross the border between Florida and the rest of the United States.  He handed his attorneys a slip of paper on which he had scribbled in blood my email address and whispered to them that they should give me the secret password to his blog with the instructions "carry on until I'm set free."

<ENDALERT>

35 comments:

Trooper York said...

Wow. I didn't know that Legal Aide was that efficient.

chickelit said...

Haz, if you go to "draft posts" I believe there is an old unpublished one of yours.

Steg said...

I can Haz posts?

:P

Hooray!

Rabel said...

I say we keep him locked up until he tells us what kind of tree that was with the double sided fruit.

Trooper York said...

Hey that was a transgendered fruit. Don't be a bigot. Shame on you.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Ha ha.

Here I'am back in the middle with you...

Methadras said...

One Lem enter, no Lem leave.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Yes Haz is back on with us. We are very fortunate to have him back for as long as he wants to stay.

BTW. I guess this is as good a post as any to make an announcement.

Relax... it's nothing earth shattering. I'm going back to New Jersey for a week. One of my nephews is getting married friday.

I dont know if I will be able to post regularly from up there. But, I'm confident our collaborators will not let us down.

thanks.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Also... I could use some your help in the form of donations?

I'm going up there, will need to put something in an envelope for my nephew and a few incidentals.

Anything, I will accept gladly. Thanks.

Rabel said...

If Lem falls into the gorilla cage in New Jersey should they:

A. Shoot the gorilla
B. Shoot Lem
C. Video the encounter and post it on youporn.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Well, B is out, as far as I'm concern.

Call me biased.

Chip Ahoy said...

You got me thinking about possible wedding related pop-up cards.

Shut up, I'm thinking. That's what my dad said to anything I peeped when he was working on an automobile. It made learning mechanics such an enjoyable childhood experience with lasting worthwhile repercussions. Turns out, my friends do it too.

I'm trying to see how opening the card can cause two things to pass right by each other as two ships in the night, two camel caravans, Two trains colliding but instead pass by each other, a cat misses catching a bird, a puppy runs to the right while a porkchop flies overhead to the left, a chameleon's tongue goes past the spot a fly vacates to arc in the chameleon's direction, Tarzan and Jane swing past each other on vines, page after page of things passing each other and just missing, as many pages as patience for the project allows, scene after scene, and then finally on like the sixth or seventh page the same mechanics except this time tuxedo and wedding dress meet at the top of a cake kaboom married the end.

Okay? Now that would be a wedding card they would keep for the rest of their lives if not the rest of their marriage.

Maybe it should be a tearaway two-part card with two fronts and two backs. There's a survival trick even yeast cells and worms know about.

Michael Haz said...

Haz, if you go to "draft posts" I believe there is an old unpublished one of yours.

Chick, thanks. There were three; two had no content, the third was rambling, and I may or may not delete it.

Interestingly, there are unpublished drafts form Pastafarian and Freeman Hunt in the archives, as well as a ton of unpublished work from TY and Lem.

Trooper York said...

Hey we are lazy bastards.

I am so lazy I am an honorary Dominican. Just sayin'

Michael Haz said...

I am so lazy I am an honorary Dominican

Huh. I would have pegged you as a Franciscan, or maybe a Jesuit, but not a Dominican.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I never touch other people's draft figuring they might want to go back to it at some point. You never know.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I haven't seen bags in a few days around here.

Did somebody drive him off?

Trooper York said...

No Lem. He is posting elsewhere so he can hang out with other people who agree with him that Trump is the worst. He can't support his arguments anymore.

I wouldn't put any motive on why people are not around. They have a host of reasons. Some just have lives and are too busy.

Why not let people speak for themselves. We don't know. I mean I don't know for sure.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I'm going to have to pay more attention to what's going on.

Bags is a good friend, been very supportive from day one.

I can't afford to lose him.

Trooper York said...

You should contact him directly Lem. That would be best. Let him speak for himself. Not that he owes anybody anything.

ndspinelli said...

Lem, Bags was called everything in the book here. He came back briefly to give a tribute about his late mother. He is valuable, and I think the comment @ 6:28p speaks for itself, now doesn't it. You should do what YOU think is right, Lem. You have a good heart and good instincts.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Thanks

Trooper York said...

Once again let bags speak for himself. Don't listen to people who want to start trouble. You are the boss here. You should find out what is what.

chickelit said...

Bagoh20 has a lot of integrity as a commenter and it is sad that he apparently left. I don't think that he was "driven off" and Troop is the wrong one to blame anyways. He does comment at TOP now. I was amused by a whip-smart female commenter named Angelyne over there who basically cleaned his clock he other day. This is why I don't enter into political arguments. :)

chickelit said...

@Haz: Regarding the older unpublished posts by former co-bloggers: I made a post about it a while back called: The Great Post Abortion Debate.

Catchy title, huh?

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Bags closed off his profile.

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

I miss the wisdom of Bagoh20.

chickelit said...

I miss the wisdom of a lot of people, including bags.

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

I miss my wisdom. (what little of it there was) It died and blew away in the wind.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I found Bags email and I sent him one asking him to come back.

I hope he will.

bagoh20 said...

"Bags is a good friend"

You know that's true, Lem, and you are the best blog host I ever read. Really an exceptional mix of humility, balance, intelligence and humor, but I don't feel that I really fit here like I used to. Being a lover of freedom above most values, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. I've just found that this thing I used to enjoy is getting to be like being a gamer, which I find a ridiculous obsession - too intrusive and costly in the living of a life. I'm not running away, just circling wide. I comment occasionally at TOP where, like here, I'm still in a tiny minority, which I prefer, but my orbit has just gone much more elliptical and the internet is no longer in the center. Still, I'll be drawn back without doubt.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

I understand. Thanks for your quick response.

Trooper York said...

Hope you find time to comment now and again bags. Sometimes it's good to take a brake.

Michael Haz said...

.....my orbit has just gone much more elliptical and the internet is no longer in the center...

Bags, that was well said, and it describes perfectly where I now am. Life outside the computer is pretty interesting.

ndspinelli said...

Bags, Welcome home.