Thursday, January 16, 2014

Robot Bartender Joke

Because a pub with a robot hamburger making machine must also have a robot bartender.

A guy goes into a bar in Louisiana where there's a robot bartender!  The robot says "What'll you have?" and the guy says "Whiskey."   The robot brings the guy his drink and says to the him "What's your IQ?"  The guy says "168".  The robot then begins to talk about physics, medicine and space exploration with the guy.

The guy finishes his whiskey and leaves.....but he is curious about the robot.  So he goes back to the bar.  "What'll you have?" asks the robot.  "Whiskey" says the guy.  The robot brings the guy his drink and says to him "What's your IQ?"  The guy says "100".    The robot then begins to talk with the guy about NASCAR, Budweiser and the Chicago Bears.

The guy leaves, but finds it very interesting and decides to try one more time.  He goes back into the bar.  The robot says "What'll you have?" and the guy again says "Whiskey."   The robot brings the guy his drink and says  "What's your IQ?"  The guy says "uh, about 55".  

The robot leans in and says "So.......you people still happy with Obama?"

9 comments:

Michael Haz said...

When buying a robot, the first thing to find is the Emergency Kill Switch.

If you hit the switch, the robot kills you.

ndspinelli said...

A couple are having marital problems and the wife gets the husband to go to marriage counseling. The guy hates all the feelings stuff. The female shrink and the wife begin talking about mixed emotions and how someone can say something and in just one sentence it can bring on happiness, sadness and anger. The husband is fed up now and blurts, "Wait a minute, you say one sentence that can make me feel those 3 emotions." The wife smiles and says, "Out of all your friends, you have the biggest dick."

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Well, if we want the robot to mimic humans as much as possible...

Oh, hell, it's a joke, isn't it?

Michael Haz said...

Is this thing on?

ricpic said...

"...you people still happy with Obama?"

His stash. They're happy with his stash.

And don't confuse them with questions about how Obama got his stash, who he took it from or whether his stash might be running low. Don't be "nasty."

Unknown said...

I went to the gym and watched a little MSNBC. Hilarious. It's all Hillary Hillary Hillary! big money big money big money!
And then Rachel Maddow comes on and she's wall to wall Christie.

AllenS said...

For your entertainment, I present to you, Eli the Accountant:

The Farmers Daughters

Sorry about the ad.

Icepick said...

Robot Bar Joke:

A guy walks into a bar and sees a robot bartender. He slides up to the bar and asks in a low voice, "Know where a guy can get a good lube job around here?"

[Insert your own punch line -- HERE}

William said...

Are killer robots protected under the second amendment? What if they don't use firearms but lasers or death rays?