Remembrance of Things Pabst

So the nieces and nephew came over today and we decided to go out. I wanted to cook but the wife didn't want me to work as I have been pretty tired lately. Now of course it is hard for us to go out because we have to find a place with gluten free options. Luckily there is this burger joint that has a bunch of gluten free stuff so we went there. It is called Bareburger.

Now this is a chain and it has a California vibe. Laid back. It gives you menu place mats. The kids get coloring pages and crayons. This hipster douche with a man bun grabs his kids paper and starts coloring. The shit you have to put up with when you want to give someone a slap.

Anyhoo we all look at the menus. Now it was early bird Saturday night and they had the second team in. It was only 3 and the heavy hitters start on the night shift. So they had a couple of brothers working as waiters. Not actual brothers. You know. Soul brothers.

So this kid comes over and takes our order. Got pretty much everything wrong. I am pretty easy going but they fucked up the wifes order and she don't play that. She ordered turkey bacon and guacamole on the side but the poured it over the top of her gluten free veggie burger. And the bun wasn't toasted. It was basically frozen as they must keep the gluten free buns in the freezer and they never toasted it when they corrected the order. Still they comped it so they did the right thing and I can't complain..

But that wasn't the funny part. You see after every item on the menu they have letters that denote something. They have a "V" for Vegan or a "GF" for gluten free. So my niece sees one that she doesn't understand. She asks the waiter "There's an "N" after this burger....What does the "N" stand for?"  My mother in law shouts from across the table as she points at me and yells "DON'T ASK HIM WHAT THE N WORD IS."

We are still laughing.

Remembrance of Things Pabst.

These days I have to be careful about what I eat and what I drink. No salt. No alcohol. The wife can't have gluten or dairy. So all of those post about the restaurants we would go to is a thing of the past.

Now my cardiologist is a guinea and he knows what's what. He tells me that generally I have to be strict but once a month I can have a drink or something a little salty. You see we don't eat out because it is very hard to find gluten free alternatives. So the wife gets this app that list all the gluten free joints within five miles of where we might be. That really worked out for us tonight.

We had to go to our new favorite place "U Break I Fix." It is a new chain that fixes electronics. Ipads. Ipods. Computers. Basically anything with a plug. We brought a couple of things that were so easy to fix that the guy didn't even charge us. Today we brought a track pad mouse for an Mac computer. The guy fixed it one two three and we were good  to go. We step outside and decide we want to eat out and check out the gluten free app. Low and behold we are standing right in front of the first thing on the screen. Monaghan's Irish Pub.