Saturday, May 13, 2017

The Onion: "Woman Transitions From Being Terrified Of Getting Pregnant To Being Terrified She Can’t Get Pregnant"

Via Instapundit:  Acknowledging that she once considered conceiving a child to be the greatest threat to her future, local woman Rebecca Davis confirmed Wednesday that she has transitioned from being terrified of getting pregnant to being terrified she can’t get pregnant. “I’m just really scared that it may never happen at this point,” said the 34-year-old woman who has closed the chapter of her adult life when the sight of a negative pregnancy test brought on a wave of pure relief and is now consumed by anxiety that she may never see a blue plus sign. “All we can do is keep trying.” At press time, a desperate Davis was reportedly picking up fertility medication from the same pharmacy where she had once frantically purchased Plan B.

The Onion is more real than real life.

4 comments:

AllenS said...

Make up your mind.

ricpic said...

I notice fewer comments recently by the ladies. I hope they haven't been either scared off or put off by the macho posturing - I plead guilty - that can get a little out of hand around here. On a topic like this especially female input would be enlightening. DBQ, MamaM and the cartoon drawing lady whose name escapes me at the moment -- please don't give up on us because of a few over-the-top comments.

edutcher said...

The womyn hear the biological clock and want that designer child they can raise as a vegan transgender that hates anything that isn't Left.

ricpic said...

the cartoon drawing lady whose name escapes me at the moment

Think you mean deborah. Never fear, I believe all of them have a life.

chickelit said...

Her power of destruction was a given but her power of creation was a taken.

I do feel some empathy for her. I've know women raised to think that procreating was the most amoral thing they could do. Most of them snap out of it.