Monday, December 19, 2016

A Roman walks into a bar...

... and asks the bartender for a martinus.

The bartender asks, "Don't you mean a martini?"

The Roman replies, "If I wanted a double I'd have asked for it."

But aside from old jokes something similar to that really did happen last Saturday at the Bull and Bush. Joe decided a Bloody Mary sounded like a good idea. The waitress asked, "Do you want the bacon and pickle?" This sounded weird to Joe. On the menu it says that garnish is $1.00 extra and that was the deciding factor against it. Funny. Joe could buy the whole restaurant and not even feel it, but still, it didn't sound that great to begin with. I said, "Come on!"

A young girl sitting next to me on the same bench but at an adjoining table overheard that and thought it was funny. "Great sales technique! Come on. How persuasive."

This started conversation between us. Now she's a regular there and become explainer of the odd garnish, cold bacon fat doesn't sound very good dipped in tomato juice. The next question was single or double? I visualized a double would come in a double size glass with twice as much tomato juice but that's wrong. And I wanted half the amount of vodka, best in a double size glass. That would be a double size tomato juice with 1/4 the regular amount of vodka, but that's not what's happening there. A double is twice as much vodka in a regular size glass, more vodka and less tomato juice. I don't know what I ended up with, a single with 1/2 the usual vodka, it still tasted strong to me and the bacon and pickle really is weird.

Broncos lost. Everyone was wearing orange sports shirts with numbers.

17 comments:

Some Seppo said...

Our beloved World Champions have fallen on hard times this season. So no double like '97 and '98 seasons. Even the defense quit in the third quarter yesterday. I think Kubiak will be having a very hard meeting with Elway in three weeks.

ndspinelli said...

I don't drink Bloody Marys. Although I love tomatoes, as all Eyetalians do, I hate tomato juice. I did bartend in my younger years. I quickly learned Bloody Mary lovers are very persnickety. So, I would pour the vodka and juice in the glass and put all the accoutrements in front of the customer, allowing them to make it themselves. Over the ensuing years, I have seen bar owners putting all the ingredients in 6 pack bottle cartons for customers to use. I like that. I think the Bloody Mary garnish, like so much in this obscene US food culture, has gotten out of hand. Celery, pickle, or olive. Basta!

ndspinelli said...

More is not always better. It is often worse.

ndspinelli said...

The Broncos are fading. But, Osweiler has been a bust in Houston. They yanked him yesterday.

AJ Lynch said...

Yeah I saw the Texans pulled Osweiler and put in Tom Savage who went to Cardinal O'Hara High School which is maybe ten miles from me.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

Sorry about the Bronco's losing.

I like bacon martinis, they are good. Bacon in bloodies are good too. But the best bloody I had was one loaded with an oyster, lemon half stuffed with crab meat, the olive stuffed with crab meat, bacon wrapped prawn, and a little sandwich with crab meat on top. It was incredibly good and quite filling. It ended up being lunch.

It was at the Fish Hopper in Monterey

AprilApple said...

Yeah. The trend to stick bacon in everything - I'm over it.

edutcher said...

Martinus, second declension.

I love it.

chickelit said...

"Martinus, second declension."

Martinis do have a way of making people declench, especially after a second one.

ken in tx said...

I ordered a scotch and soda at a Ruby Tuesday's in Virginia, last summer. As the waitress was leaving, she asked, "Is Coke OK?" I told her "Club soda, not just any soda." This is not the first time my order of scotch and soda was misunderstood in this way, but the others were in foreign countries.

deborah said...

Good one, chick.

Sixty Grit said...

I had bacon with my egg. Thanks for the reminder.

ndspinelli said...

Old joke. Martinis are like tits. One is not enough, three is too many, two is just right.

ndspinelli said...

From a guy who, in his drinking days. would have 6-7. Dry, Beefeater, olive.

Methadras said...

AprilApple said...

Yeah. The trend to stick bacon in everything - I'm over it.


but but but but, bacon...

ndspinelli said...

Meth will stick his bacon in everything.

ndspinelli said...

I'm interested in how people eat their bacon. I will eat it from limp to fairly crispy. I like it all. There's a great scene in Dances With Wolves where a settler is cooking bacon over a fire and eats it damn near raw. That's just before the savages come and scalp him. I actually prefer sausage, slightly over bacon. Pork is my favorite meat. We're having a crown pork roast w/ cornbread stuffing for Christmas.