“Think as I think,” said a man, “or you are abominably wicked; you are a toad.” And after I thought of it, I said, “I will, then, be a toad.” ― Stephen Crane
Do turkeys ever wonder, "Am I trapped in a pattern of behavior that causes me to lose sight of something greater in my life? Does that bird, who has no ostensible reason to choose me over other toms, do so only for security? Is she so jaded? Am I? Vacillating between self doubt and an overwhelmin desire to part her feathers, how long before I sour her trust?
Hey, get stuffed! I'm--er, a sentient animal who bears no likeness to a human...wait, uh yeah, is emoting here, you freaking spam jerk!
I fucking swear to Ganesh, if I ever see your filthy bubble wrap floating on the Ganges again, I'm gonna split you like Sunny Leone wandering off a Bollywood shoot
If the great turkey farmer above misses with his axe someday, severing me from my wattle, but only leaving me to live as a shadow of my former turkey-self for many years later, will my meat become too tainted for consumption?
And what's a "circule"? You think I'm gonna trust you for my next relocation with my fine china, festooned with the elegant periwinkles, you shitheel?
Chip can you do a gif of Hillary having a tongue shoot out to eat that fly off her face.
Aw, don't be too hard on Bill, I mean Gupta. He is lonely since he and Titus broke up. He planning to rewrite on own blog, "Are Articles Really Necessary, or Was Tonto Really an Indian?"
Somehow wild turkeys doesn't have the ring of wild horses.
Spam removed that Adamsundeground is responding to. How did that get through?
Oh, thanks. Now I look crazy. Why doesn't that surprise anyone?
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