Sunday, February 28, 2016

"Boy awakes from coma addicted to cheese and swearing"

Independent: Doctors were forced to put Kai Thomas in a coma while he recovered from a brain bleed last year, and though he eventually regained the ability to move and speak he was left with two bizarre side effects (also ones I experience from time to time when drunk).
"He's addicted to cheese and he can't stop swearing," his mum Tracey told the Daily Mail.
"One day I was in the kitchen, when I heard Kai yelling in his bedroom," she added.
"He was screaming 'F*ck, bastard, sh*t'. I wondered what on earth was going on - the expletives were coming thick and fast."
She headed upstairs and found her son chowing down on a wheel of cheese. She's since noticed more of it going missing from the fridge.
"He had always liked cheese but now he was obsessed with it - he even added it to his cereal," Mrs Thomas said. (read more)

18 comments:

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

It could be worse, when you think about it.

AllenS said...

Did he wake up in Wisconsin? Welcome home, brother!

Jim in St Louis said...

GodFuckingDamm Brie!!

Adamsunderground said...

Mom, gimme some breast-milk cheese, and stop buying that Velveeta shit, you fucking neglectful cow

Adamsunderground said...

Nobody mention toe cheese or smegma around this kid

Trooper York said...

Cursing and addicted to cheese?

That's on my business card.

Trooper York said...

This is the Kid that Trump is going to send to negotiate with the Iranians.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

He could have woken up and asked to have his name changed to a girls name ;)

Methadras said...

Hmmm, an onset of Tourettes?

Dear corrupt left, go F yourselves said...

lol Lem.

'This guy he's terrific and we've filled the entire oval office with cheddar for him. Isn't he great!'

Trooper York said...

It's Trumplets syndrome.

ricpic said...

A life without swearing and cheese is no !X#@*&@*#X life at all!

Jim in St Louis said...

What did Charles de Gaulle say about governing a nation with 246 types of fucking cheese. Holy merde.

Trooper York said...

Blessed are the fucking Cheesemakers for they shall inherit the best spot in the deli showcase.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

Good one April, and Troops

ndspinelli said...

He'll have his own Reality TV Show and 2 minutes of fame soon.

Trooper York said...

Actually it is fifteen minutes of fame. Just sayn'

ampersand said...

Is it like " Moe, Larry, Cheese"? Do they shove a hunk of Cheddar in his puss when he goes off?