Thursday, October 29, 2015

Frank Cannon for President!


Reporter: Excuse me Mr. Cannon but how can you justify driving around in a gas guzzling Lincoln Continental. If you expect to be elected President? Don't you want to go green?
Frank Cannon: Well how am I going to fit the girls in the car when I am driving them down to Atlantic City.
Reporter: What girls?
Frank Cannon: Stella Stevens, Angie Dickinson and Charo.
Reporter: What do they want with a fat load like you?
Frank Cannon: Don't be a wise guy you little pissant. Anyone who can see their pecker past a belly like mine must have a real shlong.
Reporter: I would like take a poll on that.
Frank Cannon: I don't swing like that.  You don't get to take my pole. Talk to Barnaby Jones. He was a dancer you know.
Reporter: I still don't believe you.
Frank Cannon: What do I give a shit? The girls like to take the pole. I mean I admit I am a fat bastard so they are always on top. But they love it. They invented a new sport when we started doing this in the 1970's. They call it pole dancing. 
Reporter: What a crock.
Frank Cannon: Hey why don't you go chase down Richard Kimble or some shit like that? Or go to work for CNBC. They always have room for another pajama boy pansy like you.
Reporter: The people have a right to know.
Frank Cannon: Why can't I just eat my burgers?

14 comments:

Trooper York said...

Now that's what I call a double cheeseburger!

edutcher said...

Smile when you say that!

Frank was a good man.

rcocean said...

Subtle yet funny.

ricpic said...

That Lincoln Continental waddled more than Conrad.

Methadras said...

I miss robert conrad.

WWIII Joe Biden, Husk-Puppet + America's Putin said...

did you know that Robert Conrad's last name was Falkowski. and that he was born to teen-aged parents?


Robert Conrad Falkowski.

He was hot in Wild Wild West. I miss him too. Not that he's dead. He's not.

Methadras said...

April,

Yeah, he's a Ski? A Pollock. That's why I like him. You can usually trust a Ski.

chickelit said...

Cannonical fodder: He'd gladly pay you tomorrow for those two today.

That's another triple.

chickelit said...

OK, I need to work on a Robert Conrad voice impression. It would be perfect for playing back bagoh20's comments in the "Wild Wild West Coast."

ndspinelli said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
edutcher said...

AprilApple said...

He was hot in Wild Wild West. I miss him too.

His last flick was Arnie's "Jingle All The Way".

From the look of that, he's aging nicely.

WWIII Joe Biden, Husk-Puppet + America's Putin said...

ah! I cannot imagine myself watching "Jingle all the way". My memories of Robert Conrad in Wild Wild West cannot be tarnished and must be maintained in a time warp.

chickelit said...

chick and I have eaten In and Out Burgers together. Hopefully again this winter.

I remember that. I was the one who sent Trooper this photo of you.

JoelClaunchArt said...

WILLIAM Conrad was great.