Monday, April 14, 2014

Carney family profiled in Washington Mom

So many things right off that are odd even more on closer look, but who would do a closer look in this heavily Photoshopped piece? Who cares enough to examine? Why bother doing all that? It doesn't make sense to do it, and it doesn't make sense to seek them out. And who can bear to read through this whole puff piece, with prices of things that they wear in staged photos and have enough additional interest to dig through uncovering details in this seriously flawed unreal photo set.

Let's put a pineapple over here and another pineapple over there because we always buy two pineapples each trip, at least, along with all melons available, in fact we already ate five.

All that fruit cut open and ready to go, bananas all yellow, delivered fresh every day. Enough carbs to fuel Boston Marathon, all at once, opened for this family of four. Pancakes piled up, soft eggs in cups and one in the air.


As food stylist type, I'm offended.

I have a dumb photo too like this published I'm ashamed to have participated in. I allowed a dumb person to talk me into it when I knew better, I knew it would not work. She had what she thought was a great idea but there is no way you can create spontaneity and surprise convincingly, like oh wow, look at brother flip the pancake so acely. The kids here are actually pretty good, given the task is impossible.

I should dig out the printed photo and scan it. Maybe I will later. Even though I'm ashamed of it. I was asked to interpret for Jeff for two whole days and that right there is inhuman. That really does need to go in shifts. For a seminar that he was assigned. And that was the stupidest thing on Earth because it was for communication skill improvement. Something happened and that was Jeff's punishment, and nobody in Jeff's department communicates as well as Jeff does, honestly, I know them all, of the whole lot Jeff is the best communicator of all, whatever happened it was not his fault, although deaf, nobody matches Jeff's knack for getting across any idea straightforwardly. But the thing is, Jeff withdrew. He had no use for idly talking to people. A shame too, because everyone wants to talk to Jeff. He's adorable and people want him. He'd rather be alone with his horses. 

Human Resources asked me to interview with them to write up a story about that unusual task of interpreting for Jeff. They thought it would be a good item for their office newsletter. I told them I already wrote the story and typed it, a letter to Toni describing the experience down to the raw details, as I do. I gave them a copy instead. 

She said my letter to Toni had the whole office in tears. Alternately cracking up laughing. Back and forth crying and laughing. They were thrilled with it. FRB newsletters are not all that interesting. 

The piece that they published edited out the best parts where I don't hold back on impressions and descriptions of all that occurred. Unprintable in anything so anodyne as newsletter. My letter to Toni was watered down, shortened drastically, whole sections omitted, swears removed, shined up and polished to nothing at all. Like a big chunk of diamond nicked down to stone for a finger.

Even so, there were notes left on my desk of people who read piece in the newsletter and were moved to tears just from that. I think I saved their notes.  I had no idea bankers are so emotional. 

The HR lady wanted a photo for the article but Jeff works at night. Her idea was take separate photos of us at at different times in the same spot, facing each other, and put them together as if we are speaking to each other. That is that part that was dumb. Dumber even than these photos of Jim Carrey's family.

19 comments:

Unknown said...

All the DC democrat media proobes are coupling and breeding.
One of the many reasons American journalism and the press are a big fat unprofessional incurious narrative pushing one-sided biased joke.

virgil xenophon said...

FORGET the Soviet propaganda posters! What about that BLATANT in-your-face declasse display of that Confederate flag! Are our "sophisticated" "power couple" to be forever consigned in the public mind to dwell in the nether regions of un-PC Hell along with northern rural Alabama knuckle-dragging troglodyte racist HS drop-outs? Inquiring minds want to know what the Social Register has to say about future dinnner-party invitations for the Carney family..

deborah said...

Please provide a link to your misbegotten food stylist picture. I wish to critique it.

Known Unknown said...

That's a Politburo breakfast if I ever saw one.

virgil xenophon said...

@EMD/

That's a Politburo breakfast if ever I saw one."

"Is the fish fresh?"

ricpic said...

But of course all Carney's in-the-know friends, relatives, peers and colleagues understand that the Stars and Bars are an IRONIC gesture.

Dust Bunny Queen said...

LOL.

I love the mountains of food that would feed 20 families for breakfast. Screw the little people. Let them have food stamps!!!!

I feel sorry for the kids. Growing up clueless.

Known Unknown said...

But of course all Carney's in-the-know friends, relatives, peers and colleagues understand that the Stars and Bars are an IRONIC gesture.

Click the link. The originals are Soviet propaganda posters. (Unless you are being IRONIC with your comment)

ricpic said...

Oh. I thought they actually had a Confederate flag in their kitchen. Didn't realize it had been photo-shopped as a substitute for commie posters. My mistake.

Amartel said...

Heheheh. Chip is funny.

I'm Full of Soup said...

Carney apologists, natch, are claiming the couple met in Russia in the 1990's when they were both on assignments there.

Methadras said...

The confederate flag in the back totally throws me off and frankly the staging of this photo is so blech.

Methadras said...

Of course confederate flags instead of commie posters. Because Carney.

William said...

The Confederate flag is photoshopped. The point is that given that the atrocities of the Soviet Union are of so much more recent vintage than those of the Confederacy, then shouldn't Soviet propaganda posters be given the same disrepute as open displays of the Confederate flag.....In the interests of accuracy, I am obliged to report that Carney's son is flipping an egg, not a pancake as erroneously reported by Chip. Flipping an egg takes, in my estimation, somewhat more dexterity than flipping a pancake. Carney has tried to flip a lot of eggs but rarely does the yolk remain unbroken. It's good to see that his son has mastered the skill.

ricpic said...

Many eggs must break to make omelette, comrade.

Known Unknown said...

then shouldn't Soviet propaganda posters be given the same disrepute as open displays of the Confederate flag.

Well, art*.

*- that's the justification.

Known Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Fr Martin Fox said...

The Soviet propaganda is outrageous, but I doubt anyone will even ask Mr. Carney about it.

The other notable feature of the photo-shoot is the heaping mounds of food. I'd be curious to know whether the food, after the photos were taken, was eaten, or thrown away.

ken in tx said...

They keep breaking eggs but nobody gets an omelette.