Wednesday, August 14, 2013

An Illegal Mountain


While most property and homeowners might be lucky to erect a small fence, add a new wall, or plant a few trees without applying for a permit or checking local zoning laws, things in Bejing are apparently quite different. For the last six years an eccentric doctor built a sprawling mountain villa on the roof above his top-floor flat in this 26-story residential building, all without asking permission of residents or local authorities. The enormous addition covers the entire 1000-square-metre roof and was built using artificial rocks but with real trees and grass.

Top YouTube comments:

AhnenerbeTA said...
Fucking hell that looks cool
Rezzuan Rahim said...
It's obviously the final boss level.
Top Comment comment:

Titus said...
I did something I am very proud of tonight.

A chink moved into my building from Arkansas! Why he was allowed I never know and he is from the South, major warning signs. And because no one wants to be on the condo board he, being new, was selected as the trustee. No one attended the meeting either so he was kind of default.

Anyway, we have 5 days after the first of the month to pay our $975.00 condo fees. Well on the 6th the property manager informed me that the trustee has requested that I submit my check. My check was sent on the 4th and they actually received the check later in the day on the 6th.

Now I plotted my revenge on Mao, which is what I call him, because he is chink. And although I live in the Penthouse I can still sometimes smell the stench of him and MIng Vase's food waffling up...but I didn't complain. But in the future they are going to hear about their stinky chink food.

Mao has been in Mass for over a year and still has Arkansas plates. In Mass you must enroll in Mass license and insurance after being here 6 months. Knowing that Mass insurance is like a million times more that Mayberry I decided to do something.

I got a parking ticket for $50.00 which I get most days so today I used the envelope from the Cambridge Parking Department and wrote a note on it and plastered it on Mao's windshield (in his older bmw, compared to my newer and more fab Beamer 328XI) stating that it is illegal in Mass to have an out of state redneck plate after being here for six months and that he needs to immediately register and get insurance and plates from Mass, which costs a shitload compared to Mayberry/Walmartville.

I had the honor of actually walking in the door of the building while he and his chink wife Ming Vase were reading the note. Mao and Ming were devastated and I said, "Hi, how are you"? Mao said not good...I said so sorry.

Simple pleasures in life.

And moral of the story is clean your house gook before looking to clean others. And your a chink and have a small dick.

thanks and tits.

24 comments:

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

I CAN HAZ MOUNTIN GOATZ?

Cody Jarrett said...

I really don't understand highlighting the crap Titus spews.

Literal or figurative.



Lem the artificially intelligent said...

He took the time to do it?

Cody Jarrett said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cody Jarrett said...

Whatever Lem.

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

Do they breed snobs in JohnKerryville?


Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

The fake American suburb on top of the Chinese shopping mall is wild.

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

There's an episode of Arrested Development where Kitty and Lucille are at a restaurant and things get snippy and Kitty challenges Lucille to a drinking contest. Lucille accepts and a waiter happens to walk by with a tray of drinks meant for another table. Lucille snatches one of the drinks, downs it, and slams it to the table top.

She sneers at Kitty, "That one didn't count."

A crowd gathers round and the two women start their drinking. Eventually, Kitty is passed out under the table.

Lucille gathers up her things and announces to the crowd that it's now time for her to be getting back to rehab.

edutcher said...

Probably a Party member

ken in tx said...

I gave Titus some good advice about triple-antibiotic ointment on another post. I didn't tell him that the best place to get it is Walmart. He wouldn't know where one was and wouldn't go there if he did. He would pay three of four times the price for the same thing at Rite-Aid or Walgreens. He can afford it.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

The weight of that thing could be beyond the structural capacity of the building. So while I despise overly restrictive zoning laws and I like the aesthetic of a mountain penthouse (while not an architectural gem, it has that home made House on the Rock feel to it), I am all for structural building reviews!

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

ken in sc, I am thinking Palladian's fine fifh fauce can be used for what ails you.

Even for Titus.

Joe Biden, America's Putin said...

Obama administration running a Potemkin village.

Well, it takes a village.

ricpic said...

If I had to exist in a hi-rise apartment house, no matter how upscale it supposedly is, I'd go into a deep depression and never come out of it.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

ricpic, agreed. It is not the way to live (then again, I am a cow so that is not surprising I would say that). I know plenty who do it in places like New York. They like it, but that most of them look at their houses as just a place to sleep and occasionally hang out. They are mostly out of their apartments.

rhhardin said...

I cut the grass short where the neighbor cuts it long, and vice versa, so as to make an obvious propertly line for the dog to observe the rule about.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

Earlier to day I was remembering what I might unconsiouly found appealing about the Chinaman building top setup.

I used to go to a café in North Bergen called Enigma. It has since changed name.

A comment there says...

"I always refer to this spot as "the cave place."

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

There was something appealing about the feeling that you were in a cavern, or a cave.

rhhardin said...

Cave canem.

Titus said...

Speaking of China do you know they pinch loafs everywhere. There is shit everywhere.

Titus said...

Read David Sedaris latest book and he has a hilarious section about all the phlegm and shit in China.

Titus said...

One last thing dolls....the button on the elevator has all the floors and mine is PH.

I love when a guest or a cleaning person or plumber cums into the elevator with me and I say, "could you be a dove and hit PH".

toodles.

Pastafarian said...

Shit everywhere?

Don't you have an Indian boyfriend, Titus? They say you can smell many Indian cities before your plane actually lands.

I've yet to figure out what some find so charming and witty about your commenting, Titus. Just a lot cringe-worthy attempts to gross people out with TMI about hogs and logs; presumably so that you can play the sophisticated cosmopolitan, above the plebeian disgust at your stories of shit and cock-sucking.

And then there are the attempts to boast of your "wealth", like your fab apartment, income, and BMW 328xi. You seem to fall back on that one when other attempts to outrage fall on deaf ears. By the by: The 328 is a heavy, underpowered Honda Accord, without the annoying reliability of the Honda. I'm not sure what sort of retard would pay $40,000 for a 200hp straight-six that could have come from a '75 Chevy Nova; but the naive ponce that would actually brag about that purchase -- Jesus, that's just sad.

Maybe this racism schtick is your next attempt to outrage. Sorry, but you're going to have to step it up a notch. Maybe in your next comment, you can link to graphic depictions of necrophilia, or shit-eating, or a BMW fan-boy meet up.

Pastafarian said...

And: You know, $40,000 isn't really a very expensive car. But maybe it's all that you can afford. Even I've owned more expensive cars than that.

I'm sure your PH is just as fab as your super-awesome $40,000 straight-six jalopy, Titus.