Wednesday, December 17, 2014

“It’s one thing for me to be mistaken for a waiter at a gala,”

Barack Obama said.  (The Blaze)
“It’s another thing for my son to be mistaken for a robber and to be handcuffed, or worse, if he happens to be walking down the street and is dressed the way teenagers dress.”
You and your imaginary son again.

Stephen Miller has an hilarious piece on Obama's imaginary son on Ricochet.com. Every other sentence has the word "imaginary." Readers come out of it sticking the word "imaginary" in front of everything.

His imaginary son was shot by an imaginary neighborhood watch guard. But his imaginary son is plucky and resilient and has lived a(n) imaginary hard life in the (imaginary) hood so he keeps bouncing back.

See? Stephen Miller misses a few chances to insert the word "imaginary." But that's only because he's trying so hard to avoid being completely obnoxious. And at this point, I don't.

The piece starts out about Michelle Obama's "wonderfully" publicized visit to Target, hardly disguised at all. Funny, she looks perfectly ordinary to me. And I mean perfectly ordinary. Nothing says perfectly ordinary than a woman wearing a boy's baseball cap. And I mean nothing does. Good grief, she could be anybody. The only woman who even spoke to her was a woman asking for help to reach an item on an upper shelf.

Asked her for help!

Gawl! Doesn't the woman know she is speaking to a queen incognegro?

Oooooh, the indignities one suffers due to the color of one's skin. I'm still trying to process "wonderfully publicized." And where was her security detail? Were they all dressed like plebes too? 

Recommended reading for fun and for mockery.

83 comments:

Trooper York said...

Incognegro?

Chip you are the best.

I salute you!

Shouting Thomas said...

Fraud and fakery seems to be all we've got these days.

Steve Sailer reveals that the #ILLRIDEWITHYOU! meme is another hoax.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

You are all raaaaacist for even questioning this! Sometimes people have a target on their back!

ricpic said...

All this BS from Pinocchio about police harassing black teens who wear droopy draws.

I guess this means more consciousness raising classes for the police to stop them from...from even noticing black teens as black teens go about doing what they do at ten times the rate non-black teens do what they do. I mean isn't that the endgame?...to stop the "oppression" of black criminals?

Shouting Thomas said...

The "endgame" is the same as the one that followed the 60s civil rights movement and led to the crime wave of the 70s... selective non-enforcement of the law in black communities.

Blacks will pay the price for the most part as their neighborhoods descend into anarchy and the gangs run wild.

But, the violence will also spread out into white communities.

Trooper York said...

That's when they elect Giuliani mayor.

Takes about another decade or so.

edutcher said...

Choomie is dissed daily by his homies, being called halfa cracka and all, so he and Moochelle have to get some street cred if they want to replace Al and Jessuh as Black America's new potentates.

Because all the oppressed Negroes go to Ivy League schools, get 6 figure do-nothing jobs, are fawned over by dumb, rich white people, and are elected POTUS (even if it is only by vote fraud).

I have a feeling this will turn out to be this year's Pajama Boy.

(was that racist?)

Michael Haz said...

These people are offended by everything. Why the heck and Mooch help someone too short to reach an item on the shelf? We've all done that; it's not at all racist or sexist or any ist. It's being human.

Of course, dressing in red and white like a Target employee and going to a Target store couldn't possibly be a set-up, could it? Maybe fishing for a reason to be angry about faux racism?

Nah. The Obama's wouldn't do that. Would they? Say, did anyone get the name of the person who asked Mooch for help? Probably a Dem operative.

These people are horrible.

Amartel said...

Stingy of heart and mean of spirit. That's our First WRatched Lady of the U.S.A.

Never missing an opportunity to be offended. Anti-tallists!!! Tallicism!!! Can't do a simple favor for a fellow human being without turning it into an opportunity for whining self-promotion and phony martyrdom.

Oooh noooo, someone mistook me (ME!) for a commoner.

If Mrs. Thurston Howell III and Al Sharpton had a (really stupid) daughter ....

This would never EVER skate by if she was a Republican First Lady.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

White people are concerned that this disgust with racism is getting out of hand.

How many times have any of you been handed keys on the assumption that your standing by a valet, meant that you were the valet?

I know you think it's all a normal part of life that we should all accept, and that it doesn't hint at the possibility of more demeaning or problematic attitudes. But just out of curiosity, how often has it happened to you?

Of course, incognegro is a great word. But let's not let the writing obscure your penetrating insights into the truth of the details being explored.

Shouting Thomas said...

You've hit a new low of stupidity here, Ritmo.

Not that that surprises me.

Shouting Thomas said...

I've actually done service jobs, and people expected me to be docile and serviceable and fade into the background.

Didn't bother me at all.

Chip Ahoy said...

Every valet I've seen is white or Hispanic.

:-p

My friend from Boston tells a hilarious story of his first day as parking valet. He was quite young then but at forty still just as stupid. He is actually the most fun to be around. We put on accents and behave stupidly and have a great time. But that was then. Apparently he did not know how to drive a stick shift. How he got the job is beyond me.

He learned as he went. Somebody pulled up in an expensive sports car, I forget which type, Corvette, probably, or perhaps foreign. Tossed him the keys. He jacked with the gears and sent the vehicle straight through the restaurant's large plate glass window sending shattered glass all through the inside seating area where people were dining.

He didn't last.

Shouting Thomas said...

One of my more hilarious experiences on the web occurred when I actually tried to help Crack escape his misery by explaining to him how quickly and easily he could earn an LPN and earn $20 an hour.

Meade showed up on the scene to explain that this was the proof that I was a damned racist who wanted some poor black bastard to make his living wiping white asses.

My mother became an LPN after she lost her factory job at the age of 59. She passed her boards at the age of 63 and worked at that job until she was forced to retire at the age of 83.

Shouting Thomas said...

As I remember from my study of U.S. history, the notion that our political leaders are some sort of aristocracy to whom we must genuflect is a notion that the Founding Fathers explicitly rejected.

But, I'm sure Ritmo can explain to me why I'm wrong about that.

Beyond that, I suspect that Obama's story is fabricated.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

I've actually done service jobs, and people expected me to be docile and serviceable and fade into the background.

Well, if you were actually stupid enough to have done it without pay, just because you were there (as the question asks), then that's remarkable.

Quick! Shouty! Get my gloves and car keys! No pay, just because you're there! Fetch, good boy, I do say! We will get you a Milkbone afterward! And don't forget to fill the tank while I'm out. Good Shouty!

Hahahahaha

edutcher said...

Rhythm and Balls said...

How many times have any of you been handed keys on the assumption that your standing by a valet, meant that you were the valet?

About as many as he has.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

As I remember from my study of U.S. history, the notion that our political leaders are some sort of aristocracy to whom we must genuflect is a notion that the Founding Fathers explicitly rejected.

Only someone who humps his priest's leg gets this from "not interested in being assumed available for odd jobs just because of how I look."

Yep. Pretty aristocratic to expect pay if someone asks you to park their car. How elitist.

Shouting Thomas said...

About as many as he has.

Yes, the story is an obvious fabrication.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

About as many as he has.

Yeah, but that's you, ed. You kind of look like someone with nothing better to do.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shouting Thomas said...

It's been quite a week for complete fabricated bullshit.

I'll bet Ritmo swallowed it all.

Chip Ahoy said...

All the guys at a nearby service station are white. All of them.

They have mounted fish on the walls.

It is a tiny place at the corner of 11th & Speer. Always with the best little cars in the front. Tilden Car Care is the name. You have to make an appointment because the office is so small.

I went in one day and said, "I washed my truck just for you guys."

The guy shrugged.

"Because I thought if you got your hands dirty you'd blame it all on me."

The guy laughed.

"I was actually hesitant to bring my truck to such a posh garage as this."

The guy cracked up laughing and we've been friends ever since.

The last time I went there they called to say they were keeping my truck over the weekend. I kept thinking of things I wanted repaired in addition to our little contract. So, the cost kept rising, not because of them, rather, because of me. One-by-one I kept thinking of little things that bugged me but they had no way to know the cost. I expected a very large bill.

Then, one of the things, I forget which, they did for free. The kind of repair one can do for oneself if the tools and the space are available. The sort of things my brothers do all the time. Things I was shown how to do. But it's all such a pain in the ass. I think they fixed a loose side mirror for free.

Free!

It blew me away. It was a pain in the butt add-on item.

So I asked how many were there, mechanics, office and all. They told me. I asked if they had lunch yet. They said, "no." I asked if they like pizza. "Hell yes!" But I needn't do that. Oh, but I do, Jesus told me.

They laughed again.

Such a jolly group.

I just realized I told you this already.

The point is, a little fun, a little acknowledgement goes a very long way. And it does not matter what race you are. If only the Obamas were not so racist, living in a world of their own critical race theory, they'd know all this already. I refuse to allow them set race relations back decades as they appear to desire.





Shouting Thomas said...

I don't know if you can stop them, Chip.

Inflaming racial and sexual hatred is just about all the Obamas have left.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

No one evades the question better than Shouty does. And he never wonders why, either.

Shouting Thomas said...

Michelle has been up to this shit for a long time.

She grew up rich and well connected in Chicago, thanks to a family connection to the Jesse Jackson shakedown machine.

She got into Princeton despite apparently not being academically qualified, and immediately took up the study of how to bitch about suffering from racism.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

Whatever the ghetto equivalent of lawyer is, that's Shouty.

He will never incriminate himself when it comes to Me first!, I know you are but what am I!, or the law of cutting the cheese.

Chip Ahoy said...

The linked stories include the same misunderstandings in reverse.

An officer and another colonel were at the airport. A woman mistook the colonel for a sky captain and instructed him to take her bags.

So they did.

They loaded her bags and rolled them over to the conveyor then went on their way.

Now see? That's class. Simply oblige, it was no skin off their... whatever gets skinned in those circumstances.

Another of Obama's administration, Valerie Jarrett , I believe, mistook an Army general for a waiter.

Come on, that's funny!

Shouting Thomas said...

I can't figure out what the fuck you're jabbering about, Ritmo, but that's not a new phenomenon.

Apparently, we're supposed to be worried about the horrible suffering of people who are about to shuffle off to a retirement of giving $1 million speeches at rubber chicken fund raisers.

Have I got that right?

Shouting Thomas said...

I can't recall ever complaining that I've got some racial grievance.

I'm quite happy with my life and I did exactly what I wanted to do with it.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

Well, they did manage to dress the part, Chip.

Shouting Thomas said...

The suffering of the most powerful man in the world who's about to retire to unimaginable wealth never ends.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

I can't figure out what the fuck you're jabbering about, Ritmo, but that's not a new phenomenon.

Your inability to figure things out is actually a very longstanding phenomenon. It's practically a venerable old tradition, worthy of celebration, in fact.

Lol. I'm just fuckin' wit ya.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

I can't recall ever complaining that I've got some racial grievance.

I'm quite happy with my life and I did exactly what I wanted to do with it.


That's cause your memory's poor. Even Inga used to worry about that.

You bitched incessantly at Althouse about how blacks were taking your job.

It was quite dramatic.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

The suffering of the most powerful man in the world who's about to retire to unimaginable wealth never ends.

Come on. I'm sure you felt the same way about Nixon.

Obama's "wealth" is quite imaginable. Warren Buffet's OTOH takes greater leaps of imagination to understand in proper context.

edutcher said...

Rhythm and Balls said...

About as many as he has.

Yeah, but that's you, ed. You kind of look like someone with nothing better to do.


Actually, that's the Choomster.

Me, you've never seen.

Shouting Thomas said...

Black couldn't take my job because there are no black people with high level tech skills.

So, you're lying.

Shouting Thomas said...

In 45 years in the high tech biz, I probably met 2 or 3 black people who actually had the skills to take a job.

They were black guys who had been trained in the Navy.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

Black couldn't take my job because there are no black people with high level tech skills.

So, you're lying.


I wouldn't lie about that and I'm sure my memory's much better than yours.

I have little inclination to GOOGLE your personalized anti-affirmative action screeds. If you graduated to taking AA less personally, kudos to you. But back then you seemed to have an awfully personal grudge about it and recounted quite a few diatribes about how it personally hurt you. But maybe you were confusing your job issues with your feelings.

I'm pretty much against AA, too. But I won't scream about it. I think it's ridiculous how much whiny entitlement it gives blacks. By now it's bad for them, and by extension, everyone else.

Shouting Thomas said...

If I were a black guy, I wouldn't learn tech skills, either.

A much easier and higher paying job is theirs for the asking in HR or management, and they don't have to sit in a cubicle banging on a computer.

A black guy would have to be a fool to be a Dilbert. There's much easier money available.

Shouting Thomas said...

Here's the story I actually told, which you have converted into a "blacks took my job" fable.

I worked in a start-up company that hired a black man as its manager. He supposedly had an MBA from Dartmouth.

My team quickly discovered that he was functionally illiterate, and that he couldn't write a simple memo. He spent all of his time bitching about racism and dividing the team into competing factions.

The team, not surprisingly, broke down into competing factions and couldn't get any work done.

After about six months of this, the company disbanded the entire team and fired everybody but a few people who were transferred to different departments. One of those people transferred was me.

About six months later, that black guy called me and laughed his ass off while he told me that he had been hired by a company in London at twice the salary.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

HR would have to be the most boring job of all.

Shouting Thomas said...

It's boring, but it is also quite often a no-show featherbedding job, both for blacks and whites.

Leland said...

It has gotten to the point that I'm surprised when I walk into a BestBuy and do not get asked to provide help. I had no idea it was racism.

Oh for Ritmo, like edutcher and Barack, I've been asked to Valet a car. It unfortunately happens when you wear cheap black suits and look fit enough to run to a car.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

I find that to be an even more fantastical story, actually, on the basis that:

1. London jobs paying more than U.S. jobs (not in finance) would be tricky, I presume (unless he was lying).

2. A London job offering something to a functional illiterate is even less likely than in America.

The rest of it I buy. But if you're right, then he could have been lying too. In fact, the rest of the story makes it likely that he was.

Shouting Thomas said...

Perhaps he was lying, since he was lying about everything else.

Damned if I know.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

Oh for Ritmo, like edutcher and Barack, I've been asked to Valet a car. It unfortunately happens when you wear cheap black suits and look fit enough to run to a car.

Lol. Maybe so. Wardrobe discrimination! ;-)

ndspinelli said...

I don't even need to look. Over 40 comments, RITMO v ST.

Shouting Thomas said...

It's Old Home Week, Spinelli!

Doesn't it make you feel warm and cuddly all over?

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

We're working stuff out, nd. ;-) But yes, the stream of red and white and brown (or whatever color my avatar seems) must be telling.

In any event, I sort of agree with him on the big issue. Race issues I find sometimes unnecessarily complicated, sometimes necessarily so, but affirmative action makes it all worse and just needs to go.

Shouting Thomas said...

It's the holidays!

I'm ready to kiss and make up!

Shouting Thomas said...

You know, I never thought that the guy might have been lying about the job in London.

You've actually made me think of something here, Ritmo.

The lamb is laying down with the lion!

Shouting Thomas said...

Quick... look out the window!

Anybody see the Four Horsemen?

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

No problem, ST. Glad to help.

You're not such a bad guy, yourself. Enjoy the holidays and sorry for being a pain in the past on these things.

Shouting Thomas said...

By the way, boys and girls...

I'm about to become a grandpa again!

Twins!

We know one is a boy, but the sex of the other is still not recognizable in the pics.

I'm doing the Mr. Mom thing big time with my 18 month old granddaughter! I'm getting more baby love than you guys can imagine.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

People who call up co-workers they don't ordinarily interact with at recess to brag about their changed work experiences are almost definitely lying, as far as I can figure.

Not that that happens to me often. But I know the type. And he liked to stir shit up also.

It was all fun and games until I jumped ship and he had HR throw his ass (predictably) out of there not long afterward.

Not sure what he's doing now. And I'm not sure I want to know.

Shouting Thomas said...

So, what are you doing for the holidays, Ritmo?

Hope you have a great time.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

Congratulations on the births, ST.

18 months is definitely an age when they can be fun. It lasts for almost as long.

Unless, like my nephew, they're too cute for their own good and don't know how to stop being an asshole at age 4.

I'm smarter than my brother, and trying to devise the best way to teach his kid the importance of not becoming the center of the universe.

Some of you might find this ironic.

Shouting Thomas said...

The role of a grandpa is to make the little angels think they are the center of the universe.

Life will beat them into shape in due time.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

You too, ST.

I'll be out seeing friends (including a lady-friend) and family abroad. It'll be a great ten days away and I hope to come back well rejuvenated.

Good friends and family do that. I'm just surprised how much of it I appreciate even after having had much of the same in late November.

How about you.. what'll you be up to?

Shouting Thomas said...

The last month has been hilarious for the Old Dawgz.

We started November playing for a benefit at my Catholic parish.

We ended the month playing for a Hell's Angels drugged out bash.

I'm having a hell of a good time.

Shouting Thomas said...

I'll be doing Christmas Eve with my Filipino extended family.

Christmas day with my daughter and her in-laws.

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

Then, Jam On.

And party on.

Cheers -

Shouting Thomas said...

And, tonight...

Pan fried t-bone steak smothered with sauteed sliced garlic and covered with fresh pepper accompanied by a bottle of Beaujolais Nouveau.

I'm getting a little sloshed.

Synova said...

WTF... Michelle Obama cites as some sort of evidence of RACISM that someone at Target asked her to reach something on a high shelf?

Because, what, it's treating her like a servant? WTF?

As someone who frequently asks all sorts of perfect strangers to reach things on high shelves at stores I wonder where she's been living on this planet or maybe off of it that she doesn't understand that she is TALL as well as black?

ndspinelli said...

I think if Ritmo and ST were arguing in person they would get in each others face, and then spontaneously smooch. NTTAWWT.

Rabel said...

Odd that that's the best story she could come up with. She could have just made something up like Barack.

And the cab thing, that's as much about tipping habits as it is racism. But, I guess it's still racist to profile based on perceptions of generosity to people in service occupations.

chickelit said...

This whole story is shades of Oprah in Zurich.

chickelit said...

As someone who frequently asks all sorts of perfect strangers to reach things on high shelves at stores I wonder where she's been living on this planet or maybe off of it that she doesn't understand that she is TALL as well as black?

FLOTUS is a veritable tower of glower.

chickelit said...

We know one is a boy, but the sex of the other is still not recognizable in the pics.

That usually means it's a girl.

Congrats, ST and Merry Christmas

Chip Ahoy said...

Tonight I found out a friend I've known for 15 years is a twin. And I didn't even know he had a sister.

edutcher said...

Congrats, Shout.

AllenS said...

Hey thugs, if you're going to steal something, steal a belt.

AllenS said...

I remember BJ Clinton mentioning something about how at a previous time, Obama would only be qualified to serve coffee, or something like that.

virgil xenophon said...

AllenS/

Newsflash: Obama is STILL only qualified to serve coffee..

Michael Haz said...

I don't believe a word of her story. Do yu think someone could get close enough to Mooch to ask her to get something off of a shelf, what with all the Secret Service people and reporters all around her?

Didn't happen. No photos. No name of the person who asked. Nada. Made up to fit a narrative.

Aridog said...

Chip Ahoy said ...

The point is, a little fun, a little acknowledgement goes a very long way. And it does not matter what race you are.

Very true. It helped me immensely when I lived in places half a world away. In fact, the same philosophy helps me today, everyday. I'd only add to the above statement by Chip that the ability to honestly laugh at one's self is part of the equation. And, man, I can inadvertently do some really funny stuff...but I have always found laughter to be contagious.

ken in tx said...

Even though I am retired, my daily attire is slacks, shoes with socks, and a shirt with a collar. For this reason, I think, I am frequently mistaken for a store employee. Other customers dress pretty much like they were going to a mud wrestling contest. I bet Michelle wasn't even wearing flip-flops. Everyone who saw her knew she was not a normal Target customer.

Aridog said...

Michelle is just a rude crude lady. I ask, and am asked myself, periodically, to help with something in a store or to find something. Nobody ever appears offended, glad to help in fact. Normal people like to be helpful. Being a civil human being isn't that hard...unless you just aren't one.

Aridog said...

ken in tx said...

Even though I am retired, my daily attire is slacks, shoes with socks, and a shirt with a collar.

Oh, noes..there are two of us!

Full disclosure, my usual "slacks" are Levi's these days, but still wear a shirt with a collar, and socks with my shoes...usually penny loafers or laced up Rockport chukas.

Seldom mistaken for the hired help (it's the Levi's I'd guess :-), but still frequently asked about where to find things or help get something down from a shelf. I am never the least bit put off by that...and I've done it myself at times.

What is wrong with people that they cannot just "communicate" with others graciously? I can't recall when any assistance I provided wasn't met with a smile...and smiles are contagious.

Aridog said...

Even fuller disclosure: I've got feet so ugly that they scare little children and old ladies...so sandals and no socks were gone long long ago. :-(

Michael Haz said...

Even though I am retired, my daily attire is slacks, shoes with socks, and a shirt with a collar.

Oh, noes..there are two of us!


Three. We had a rule when I was a kid that the men and boys were required to wear shirts with collars at the dinner table. It was so deeply ingrained that the only time I wear tee shirts is at the gym, doing chores, and riding my motorcycle.

Aridog said...

Haz...I do wear tee shirts a lot, but only at home or when doing something demonstrably casual in the yard perhaps. Otherwise, I "get dressed" as dear old Mom used to put it. I have it so bad that even when I am going to dinner at a nice place I wear at least sport coat or blazer as well. Long ago, the good places to eat all had "coat & tie" rules...and kept generics of both to give you if you came in otherwise. I never planned to be embarrassed by that (thus the habit has stuck)...wearing some dumpy coat last worn by whom? Drooled on by whom? Oh, please. Or a tie that would win any ugly Christmas tie contest :-)