Friday, December 16, 2016

What untrue fact did you believe to be true for the longest time?

Reddit top voted answers:

If I swallow gum, it'll stay in my stomach for seven years.

My big brother convinced me that your appendix was your testicles. For years and years, whenever I heard someone was getting their appendix removed, I thought they were getting their balls removed.

If you ask a police officer "are you you a cop?" they have to answer honestly.

A young horse is called a pony.
Nope.  Ponies are full grown horses, they're just small.

As a kid I thought you smoked by blowing the cigarette, not sucking in.

I always thought ambulances changed their siren when they passed me. I believed this until I was seven when I asked my dad about it and hee tried to explain the Doppler effect to me.

For more go here: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/5io0ey/what_untrue_fact_did_you_believe_was_true_for_the/?st=IWS5ONAM&sh=9f3b7e77

29 comments:

edutcher said...

If you sleep with a girl, she'll get pregnant.

Actually, you just have to have sex with her. Sleep has nothing to do with it.

AllenS said...

I can't remember the original fact, but hair did not grow on my hand. So, mark that down as untrue.

ricpic said...

Are you shocked when someone lies to you? Then you still haven't let go the illusion that people are "good at heart," to quote the 14 year old Anne Frank.

ndspinelli said...

That you have to go to church every Sunday in order for God to accept you into heaven.

ndspinelli said...

That if you bite the communion host it will bleed, and the bishop will have to come to clean it up.

ndspinelli said...

Eating meat on Friday was a sin.

Methadras said...

That Santa Claus was real.

ndspinelli said...

I could go on.

Amartel said...

When I was really small my dad used to tell us he could make the stop lights change from red to green. He would occasionally drive us to school in the morning if we missed the bus and would make this claim on those occasions. This was his version of entertaining the kids. I strongly suspected that he was just slowing down as he approached, waiting for them to turn, (BECAUSE HE WAS), and said so, but always harbored a little completely unreasonable belief.

Leland said...

Hillary had a chance to win.

ndspinelli said...

Amartel, Dad's love to ball bust. There is a reservoir near where I grew up. A bridge we would drive over went over the middle of the reservoir. My old man told his 4 kids one side of the bridge was hot water, the other side cold water.

AprilApple said...

We didn't have a fireplace in the first house we lived in when my parents moved from WI to CO. I was confused how Santa got in. They told me he just used the side door.

Oh - OK.

Santa - what a load of crap.

AllenS said...

This might be the last year that I write to Santa Claus. I keep writing to him every year, but when I awake on Christmas morning, and dash downstairs, Christie Brinkley isn't under the tree. I'm beginning to have my doubts.

ndspinelli said...

April, I didn't know you were a young Cheesehead! Where?

ndspinelli said...

AllenS, She takes turns every Christmas. You're up in 2027. Will you get it up?

AllenS said...

In 2027, I don't know if I'll be able to climb out of bed, Nick. I suppose I could put up the tree on the bed. I have this theory about erectile dysfunction, that is, if the woman looks like Christie, or those women you see in the commercials, you wouldn't need those pills.

AllenS said...

I should probably head over to Reddit with all of my words of wisdom.

Leland said...

Anyone answer, "that she was over 18"?

Trooper York said...

That they are all pink on the inside.

ndspinelli said...

Allen, You strike me as a guy who, as mourners kneel and pray over your casket, say, "Man, he looks good..is that a boner??"

windbag said...

Hard work pays off.

Chip Ahoy said...

I believed Audubon had eidetic memory, incredibly refined artistic skill and a high appreciation for the beauty of birds. And I held that belief until I was 22 years old and went skiing in Aspen and a grandpa aged dude named Tom Dusterberg, an architect up there, told me flatly, "HE SHOT THEM! in a chiding ridiculing incredulous manner that snap me out of my absurd boyish belief. And I've hated Tom Dusterberg ever since, more so than I hated Audubon for psyching me out so badly. (But not mad at myself for being so incredibly naïve.) What a dope.

And many many many many many more misapprehensions. And I hate everyone involved for bullshitting me so badly. They must have thought it was cute.

And I told myself very young that I'll never do that. When I grow up I'll carefully keep children straight. That their impressionable minds are open and they're trying to figure out the world. They're grasping at physics and science and the truth of the real world, like brand new computers awaiting new data, and it's my duty to help them collect truth.

Turns out they're just too much fun to f with to keep that promise 100%.

Dad Bones said...

I believed Santa's reindeer were eating that hay I put out for them and I wanted to believe that Roy Rogers would come out to the farm and visit me some day. A couple years of believing such things seemed like a long time to me when I wasn't able to convince anyone else.

Guildofcannonballs said...

GOP was the party of "small government."

AllenS said...

Having been to many funerals, I can truthfully say that nobody looks good in the casket. I'm thinking about having a closed casket. Damn! What if when I eventually get to heaven, after doing my time in Pergatory, everybody looks like they did in the casket. That would freak me out, man.

AprilApple said...

ND - small town outside of Madison.

ndspinelli said...

Allen, LOL! The open casket is starting to fade away. It was done before travel was so easy and people did not see each other for years or decades. I was just a pallbearer @ my uncles[mom's fraternal twin] and he had an open casket. It was tough on his grandkids..that freaks kids out. Open caskets had a place in time, and that time has passed on..as it were. Finally, I agree, nobody looks good. Even Ms. Brinkley will look bad. But, you might still jump her!

ndspinelli said...

April, then you, chick, Titus and myself all have that in common.

AprilApple said...

Kinda odd but very cool. On Wisconsin!