Sunday, July 24, 2016

Dragnet 1972

We were working the Night Watch out of the Intelligence Division out of the Police Headquarters. The Captain was Lemuel Cuchifritos. My Partner is Bill Gannon. My name is Friday. I carry a badge. And a grudge.

Bill Gannon walked into the division and hung the shiny jacket of his Robert Hall suit on the hook on the wall at the back of the squad. We had been partners for twenty years. We agree on most things. Except barbeque sauce. And Politics.

“Do you want some coffee Joe? I will make a fresh pot.” “We need to get it to go. We have a call. There seems to be a problem at the office of the Democratic National Committee.”

Bill laughed. “Yeah I heard about that Joe. But wasn’t that in Washington DC? I heard about it on the radio. What that have to do with us? We are the Intelligence Division. We deal with organized crime and communist subversion. Does that mean we can arrest the Democrats for being Commies? Wow that would be great. Tell me I can pistol whip that commie scumbag Sam Yorty.”

“Stop with your John Birch Society bullshit Bill. I don’t want to hear it. It seems that someone has leaked some documents to the Russians from the DNC. We have to go investigate.”

“How’s that Joe? Somebody leaked. We had that problem in Korea. There was this one nurse, a Major that loved to get leaked on. I mean she let me piss in her mouth. What a whore. Is that what you are talking about Joe?”

“No you idiot. I don’t want to hear about your time in the Army. That’s another show for Crissakes. Now come on. We have to talk to these fools down at the DNC. Some Jewish lady is in charge.”

“Aren’t they always Joe? Aren’t they always?”

“Stop with the Birch Bullshit Bill. I am not going to tell you again. Let’s go. I will even let you drive if you stop with the politics.”

“Ok Joe. That works.”


ricpic said...

I don't get the allure of the golden shower. Seriesly, what's up wid dat?

Keepin' it real here, boss!

Trooper York said...

Some people are into it. If you ever heard Jim Norton do his act he spends an hour talking about it. It seems kind of sick to me. It is the ultimate humiliation I guess. If your sexuality is tied up in power games I guess that is a turn on.

I bet Frank and Hot Lips did a lot of that kind of stuff. Just sayn'

Sixty Grit said...

Guy walks into a bar - he is missing his left hand.

Barkeeps says "Where'd you get that?"

Guy says "Verdun."

Another guy walks in, his right hand is missing.

"Where'd you get that?"

"Battle of the Bulge."

Third guy walks in - no hands at all.

Barkeeps says "Where'd you get that?"

Guy says "Robert Hall"

My father told me that joke close to 60 years ago - it's best if you can see the visuals, you know, pulling your arm up first one sleeve, then the other, then both, but it just doesn't work as well if the punchline is "Men's Wearhouse".

Trooper York said...

Robert Hall is old school. I was so proud when my Dad took me there to get a suit just like his.

chickelit said...

@Sixty: LOL!