This goes with post two below but I'm slow on the uptake and output. She's so privileged. Honestly. Compared with everyone else in the world. And yet always victim at heart, at her core she is victim, and not just feigning sympathy. She needs to be. We've seen this before. It's not that she would have us believe, it's that she really does need to be victim. But what do I look like a psychologist over here? I know what I've seen and what I've heard for six years.
But she is not talking to me anyway and she never was. Here is this uncomfortable feeling again cast over me as a pall that I've become so familiar, of myself overhearing something I shouldn't, or eavesdropping (eyesdropping, actually) on signed conversation that reveals girlish nonsense hardly worth bothering like the two smart pre-teen girls at Glenwood Springs who caught my attention by their signing whose entire conversation was through their fascinating little hands.
"Then she has her hair all tied in a knot."
"With frizz and bits of hair hanging out."
"And she just barges in and takes over everything."
"And she's always bossing everybody around.""I hate her so much. Are you guys going biking? I'm not."
"I'm staying here.""Me, yes, too let's stay put."
And I question, why am I looking at this, why am I studying it, why am I paying attention to a private conversation between girls? I feel icky pervish for watching even though it's a huge crowd, it's a very large outdoor pool. She is somebody else's first lady. And yes, it has everything to do with race and with racism. She's studied it. Written academic papers on it. I haven't. It's not my thing and it never will be. Better to not listen to this. Do you see what I mean about not listening in?
