First ladies lesbian lover died heartbroken and alone!

Eleanor Roosevelt’s ‘mistress’ died heartbroken and alone 

By Brooke Hauser New York Post October 23, 2016

They called each other “darling,” “dear one” and “heart.” They told each other “je t’aime” and “j’adore,” and wrote more than 3,000 letters to one another.

No not Hillary and Huma. 

“All day I’ve thought of you . . . Oh! I want to put my arms around you, I ache to hold you close,” the normally reserved Eleanor Roosevelt wrote in March of 1933 to her beloved. No, not her husband, President Franklin Delano Roosevelt, but a brilliant, bourbon-drinking, cigarette-smoking Associated Press reporter named Lorena Hickok, or Hick.

Their romance is at the center of Susan Quinn’s engrossing double biography, “Eleanor and Hick: The Love Affair That Shaped a First Lady.”

While Quinn is not the first to tell the tale of Eleanor and Hick, she brings new depth to their epic, three-decade-long love story.

First Ladies on the Stump

It is generally agreed that the first lady with the most dangerous bosom was Barbara Bush the wife of George Herbert Walker Bush. Although her bountiful bosom was to be expected with her matronly figure this was not the source of peril to her unsuspecting victims. Rather it was her unfortunate habit of clasping the unwary to her copious bosom in a hug and holding there while they feebly struggled to free themselves from her embrace. This lead to an unfortunate diplomatic incident when her husband was the envoy to China when she clasped the diminutive Prime Minister Cho En Lai to her chest for so long that she smothered him and he had to be revived by medical personal who were luckily on the scene. As a consequence she became know in China as 怪物 乳房 which means Godzilla tits which was a reference to the lovable monster that was a wonder and delight to all Asians as immortalized in a movie starring Raymond Burr.
(First Ladies on the Stump, Doris Kearns Goodwin Playboy Press 2007)

First Ladies on the Stump

Campaigning for President did really commence until after the Administration of James Monroe. The founding fathers felt that campaign for office was vulgar and unseemly and should not be encouraged. Thus first ladies did not lower themselves to campaign and were famous for other more important things. The first lady with the most generous and toothsome of bosoms was of course Dolly Madison who was a widow and a “woman of the world” before her marriage to future President James Madison. Her décolletage was so spectacular that the President often used it confuse and distract political and diplomatic opponents during tough negotiations. It has been speculated that it was the display of her bounteous bosom during the negotiations with France during the Jefferson Administration that led to the Louisianan Purchase having been made at such a cheap price. Her breasts were immortalized in the naming of the city of Madison, Wisconsin which is generally considered to have the biggest collection of boobs resident in North America. Dolly's heaving bussoms inspired a line of ice cream and diary products that is sold to this day. Everyone agrees that Dolly Madison’s breasts remained a wonder and delight to all Americans not least due to the fact that they were as big as the bald head of Aaron Burr.
(First Ladies on the Stump, Doris Kearns Goodwin Playboy Press 2007)

First Ladies on the Stump

The practice of wives campaigning fell out of fashion until it was revived by Ida McKinley who was sent out on the campaign trail by Mark Hanna the Karl Rove of his day. Mr. Hanna devised the “front porch campaign” where Governor McKinley rested on his porch and bantered once a day with reporters while surrogates went out to campaign among the masses. Ida McKinley loved to meet the people and enjoyed campaigning swings throughout most of the United States. The best part about these trips was the return sex she would get from the Governor who was a somewhat indolent man but was a great reader, scholar and a cunning linguist. In a strange twist of fate, President McKinley was also assassinated at the Pan-American World’s Fair in Buffalo, New York by an anarchist named Leon Czolgosz. The police of the day were very much in favor of profiling and were watching all immigrants with beards and more than six consonants in the their names but missed Mr. Czolgosz as he traveled under his mother’s maiden name of Nieman. In fact the last reported words of President McKinley when he expired on his deathbed was “Nieman.”
(First Ladies on the Stump by Doris Kearns Goodwin, St. Martins Press).

First Ladies on the Stump

The first wife of a president to campaign for her husband was Lucretia Garfield who campaigned for her husband James. It was considered vulgar and low class for women to engage in politics but Mrs. Garfield was a free spirit who delighted in mocking convention. This was because of her prior life in a geek show where she was a star performer because of the fact she had two vaginas. Young Colonel Garfield met her in New York when he was in charge of the troops that were sent to suppress the Draft Riots during the dark days of the civil war. They were introduced by Tom Thumb the world’s smallest man who owed a great debt to Lucretia as she had sheltered him in her vestigial vagina when he was trying to avoid an angry mob of rioters. Mrs. Garfield toured twenty states and was particularly popular in Wisconsin because of her love of cheese. Which she also stored in her vestigial vagina and began a practice that endures to this very day.  The Garfield’s had a legendary love story that is much neglected today because of the fact the details are so outré. It of course ended tragically when President Garfield was assassinated by a disappointed orifice seeker.
(First Ladies on the Stump by Doris Kearns Goodwin, St. Martins Press).