Top Ten lines I love in the Movies

"What we have here is failure to communicate." Cool Hand Luke.
"I expect you to die Mr. Bond." Goldfinger.
"Here's a stick to beat the lovely lady with." The Quiet Man
"What's a Bath without Bubbles." Back to School
"Like the turning of the Earth" The Searchers.
"You were my brother Fredo." Godfather Two
"I'm your Huckleberry." Tombstone
"Doncha walk away from me you chalk faced whore." Chained Heat.
"Because you're a whore." The Long Riders
"Leave the gun take the cannoli." The Godfather

Top Ten Lion Films of All Time

1."Born Free” engrossing tale with a fraught sexual subtext. Tasty Hungarian Pastry Joy Adamson adopts Elsa a tawny lithe lioness who loved to lay around on her and lick her as she stroked the pussy until she cried for mercy. Later remade as the cable series “The L Word” it is without a doubt the best lion flick around.
2. “The Lion King” which the Disney Musical that tries to make life in Africa palatable by using animals (lions) instead of other residents of the continent. It is the story of a young boy who has his father murdered and who runs away only to return to wipe out his uncle and take over the family business. It later became was spun off as the HBO series called “The Wire.”
3.       “Clarence the Cross Eyed Lion” which starred the delectable Betsy Drake formerly best known for her service as a beard. She survived the sinking of the Andrea Doria and this disaster as well. Although it was popular enough to be spun off into the sixties TV show “Daktari” about an animal hospital in Africa. It is rumored that they treated the first monkey infected with HIV. But this has not been proven beyond a reasonable doubt.
4.       “The Ghost and the Darkness” which is the story of two man eating lions working as team which devastates a railroad project. Principally famous for being the last movie where Val Kilmer weighed less than 300 pounds it also considered quite ironic that Michael Douglas dies after getting eaten by a pussy instead of the other way around.
5.       “Savage Harvest” is a story about a family being attacked by a starving pride of lions who relentlessly attack and attempt to eat a family that includes Tom Skerritt and Michele Philips. The lions were uncontrollable and caused an enormous amount of damage and death. It was later recreated at a CVS in Baltimore Maryland.
6.       “The White Lions” tells the story of a professor and his family who went to Africa to study the behavior of the White Lions. These lions were known to rely on their privilege and got many carcasses to feed on just because they were white. This later was spun off into the collected works of Ta-Nehisi Coates.
7.       “Hold the Lion, Please” a Merrie Melodies cartoon starring the inimitable Bugs Bunny. Leo the Lion tries to show he is “King of the Jungle” by hunting down a small defenseless animal (Bugs). After a long chase Leo captures Bugs and is about to administer the coup de grace until he gets a call from his wife and meekly lets him go and returns home. Currently the same scenario is being reenacted by Secretary John Kerry and the Iranians.
8.       “Zebra in the Kitchen” is a sixties movie in which Dennis the Menace Jay North in his first movie role has a pet mountain lion that is sent to the zoo. When he sees how the animals he loves were being mistreated he sets them free and they wander the streets of his town getting in various difficulties. Currently the same scenario is being reenacted by President Obama as he releases various criminals from federal detention.
9.    “Napoleon and Samantha” a film starring two very annoying child stars of the 1970’s Johnnie Whitaker and Jodie Foster. As well as the communist Grandpa Walton and Michael Douglas before he started eating pussy. The two annoying child stars run away from home after the commie dies and have adventures with an old lion named Major who they inherited from a dead clown. The events and tone of this movie were later reenacted by Whitaker when he was Dana Plato’s manager and by Jodie Foster’s relationship with John Hinckley which of course caused a tragedy by her continuing love of pussy. Hinckley should have known by the way she stroked that cat.
10.   “Secondhand Lions” is the story of two old coots and their demented great-nephew. They buy a lion they intend to kill and stuff but decide they like it and let it live with them. There are many complications and bull shit stories about World War One, the Foreign Legion and a rich Arab sheik. In the end the lion saves the kid and dies heroically and they all live happily ever after. It is currently being reenacted in the Republican primary with Scott Walker as the boy and Donald Trump as the cowardly lion.

Top Ten Westerns of All Time.....if you want to talk about movies!

In Inverse order from 10 to 1.

10. She Wore A Yellow Ribbon. I don’t know it this really qualifies as a Western but the themes and the photography are great. I want to include Ford’s cavalry pictures as westerns. The theme of an old warhorse retiring to be replaced by the younger generation is a recurring one in Ford’s later work. John Wayne gives a stellar performance as Captain Nathan Brittles and his cemetery scene where he talks to his wife let me go to my dad’s grave and talk to him without feeling self conscious. The photography and costumes were influenced by the great western artist Fredrick Remington and the shots during the storm were just a lucky break that Ford just kept rolling through. Superb.

9. The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance. Lee Marvin is the best villain that I ever saw. He had this fuck you attitude that was right on the money. Jimmy Stewart can get a little cloying but he had an edge here as the slightly sleazy lawyer who steals the Dukes girl. Woody Strode had another of his great almost silent performances as Pompey. “When the truth disagrees with the Legend, print the Legend.” Or the modern newsman’s motto, “Just make shit up.”

8. Johnny Guitar. Man this is a great movie. Joan Crawford is unbelievable and the dialogue is unreal. Nicholas Ray is a great underrated director.

Johnny: How many men have you forgotten?
Vienna: As many women as you've remembered.
Johnny: Don't go away.
Vienna: I haven't moved.
Johnny: Tell me something nice.
Vienna: Sure, what do you want to hear?
Johnny: Lie to me. Tell me all these years you've waited. Tell me.
Vienna: [without feeling] All those years I've waited.
Johnny: Tell me you'd a-died if I hadn't come back.
Vienna: [without feeling] I woulda died if you hadn't come back.
Johnny: Tell me you still love me like I love you.
Vienna: [without feeling] I still love you like you love me.
Johnny: [bitterly] Thanks. Thanks a lot.

What a great movie chock full with lesbian overtones and the female lead is named after a sausage


7. The Long Riders. A great Walter Hill flick where he had a set of brothers play the members of the James Gang. The gang was actually made up of brothers who had run away to fight with Quantrill during the Civil War. The James and Younger clans were cousins and the Millers and the Fords were part of the extended kinship of intermarriage of rural America. As Cole Younger, David Carradine gave his best performance ever. One of my favorite lines of all time is in this movie.

Belle Starr: Coleman Younger! Seems like you folks are havin' a real nice party in there.
Cole Younger: I expect so, with free food and drink and all.
Belle Starr: How come I wasn't invited?
Cole Younger: 'Cause you're a whore, Belle.
Belle Starr: I might be; but at least I ain't a cheap one

"Cause you’re a whore, Belle." Love it.

6. Unforgiven. A great Clint Eastwood flic that really shows what violence is all about. The performances by Richard Haris and Gene Hackman are great as well. Morgan Freeman overdoes the saintly Negro bit but at least it can serve as a blue print for the Barack Obama campaign. This movie is a distillation of all that Eastwood learned about Westerns throughout his career. The greatest compliment I could give him is that it easily could be a work from Ford or Peckinpaugh. It is by far his best work.


5. Stagecoach is the movie that set the archetypes for almost all subsequent westerns. The whore with the heart of gold. The greedy banker. The southern gentleman fallen on hard times who lives as a gambler and gunman but retains his courtly ways. The drunken doctor who is a truth teller but still a drunk. And most important of all is the Anti-hero. A bad man who does good. A killer who is in the right and does what he has to do. The Ringo Kid as played by John Wayne is the model for hundreds of movies and TV shows and is the archetype of the western hero. In this movie, the shots and the action and the characters set the standard for western movies.

4. Red River is the movie that really made John Wayne a star. His portrayal of Dunson is one of his top three performances and his chemistry with Montgomery Clift is amazing. You could believe that they were father and son. Adopted son but son all the same. This set the tone for all the trail drive movies to follow. The funny part about the movie is that most people assume because it was a Wayne movie that John Ford directed it. The real Director Howard Hawks loved to bust on Ford that he made Wayne a star. Ford would pour his drink over the heads of fans who told them how much they loved Red River. He might have been pissed, but Red River and Stagecoach were the originals that thousands of hacks have copied from for decades.

3. Rio Grande is my sentimental favorite. A great love story with Wayne and Maureen O’hara, the themes of conflict between duty and family is always a favorite. The comic scenes with Victor Mclaglen were stellar as always and the movie could be seen as a metaphor for the war against terror. General Sheridan comes down and tells Colonel York that he has to break the law by crossing into Mexico to stop the attacks by the Apaches. The government might have to disown him but he still has to do the job. It’s fun and lighthearted in an engaging way and better than 90% of the crap we get to watch today.

2. The Magnificent Seven is one of the best action westerns ever made. I much prefer it to the Wild Bunch as it is more stylized and has such a great cast. I mean James Coburn and Charles Bronsen as supporting players. Eli Wallach plays the best “bad tooth” Mexican bandito this side of the Treasure of Sierra Madre. It was a copy of Seven Samurai which Kurasowa has often said was heavily influenced by John Ford’s westerns. So it was a western influenced by an eastern which was influenced by a western. Yul Brenner gave such an iconic performance that he lived off it for years as witness the comic turn it took in Westworld. This is just great popcorn entertainment.

1. The only real agreement I have with AFI is that The Searchers is the best western ever made. Wayne was great as the uncle searching for his niece so that he could kill her because she was ruined by being raped by Scar the Comanche chief. It included most of Fords stock company in their usual roles but they seem sharper and more in tune. This movie has been ripped off in so many ways and so many times that it is impossible to list them all. The themes of lost love and redemption are universal and it is above all great entertainment.


Honorable Mention: Fort Apache, The Gunfighter, The Big Sky, Cheyenne Autumn, The Angel and The Bad Man, The War Wagon, The Daybreakers, Ride the High Country, Will Penny, The Alamo (the one with the Duke of course), Destry Rides Again, The Star Packer, The Tall Horseman, Duel in the Sun, They Died with their Boots On, Drums Along the Mohawk, Rancho Notorious, Major Dundee, Broken Arrow, Lonely are the Brave, The Way West.

Are "ism's" Contagious?

Squirrels, Rabbits, Blue Jays, and Mockingbirds

My favorite scene from an old classic:

 

The clip cuts off too soon and should have included how Calpurnia calls Scout into the kitchen and proceeds to give her a lecture on hospitality: Walter was a guest and therefore could do whatever he wanted to do. The absentee mothering that Calpurnia did was underplayed in the movie, IMO. Maybe it was too controversial/suggestive for movies in 1962?