Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Continued adventures in low-grade alcoholism

With this post I hope to recapture some of the scorn, profanity, and abuse heaped upon me after my first cocktail post, my take on the Old Fashioned.

Tonight's drink:  Gordon's Cup.

This is no ordinary drink.  I'll have you know that I've received glowing compliments on this, and not just from slobbering yobs already half in-the-tank.  I've had sophisticated people, actual hoity-toity Europeans (well, dirty Swedes, but still technically Europeans) tell me it's the best cocktail they've ever had.  It's refreshing and somewhat dangerous, in that you don't taste the alcohol and could drink them like it's your goddamned job.

You'll need:

3/4 lime, wedged
cucumber, two 1/2" thick slices
1/4 cup gin
2 tbsp simple syrup
pinch sea salt
crushed ice
Details after the jump.



(Yeah, I know, that's Bombay Sapphire Gin.  It's nothing fancy.  I received it as a gift from my sister [the crazy one, who's actually on antidepressants, and once went after my brother with a screwdriver].  It happens to work adequately in this recipe.  If you have a better recommendation, let me know in the comments.  Be forewarned, however:  There are a few commenters who might well be my crazy sister.)

Also needed:  Muddler, shaker, tall glass

If you're one of those readers on a Freeman Hunt low-carb diet, then

a)  Jesus, life's too short, eat a cookie, and

b)  There are alternatives to conventional simple syrup.

Even with sugar-free syrup, this drink wouldn't be quite as low-carb as Freeman Hunt's own signature cocktail, the Screamin' Freeman:  Combine 3 drops of rainwater with a tumbler-full of pure grain alcohol; garnish with a human adrenal gland.

Perhaps you're a normal carb-consuming person, but you're unfamiliar with simple syrup.  In that case I'd better present:

*********
Tool lemma:  Simple syrup

Bring equal parts (by volume) white granular sugar and water to a boil; stir continuously for a few minutes til sugar has completely dissolved.  Remove from heat, let cool a little, and pour into glass container.  You can store in the fridge, and you can add a little vodka if you're worried about it spoiling, but I don't bother with either.  The ingredients cost pennies and it takes 10 minutes, so if you buy simple syrup in a bottle, you should probably punch yourself in the balls.  Go ahead, do it right now.  We'll wait.
*********

Back to the Gordon's Cup:

Chill your tall glass by filling it with (normal cubed) ice and water.

Muddle the lime, hard, in the bottom of the shaker.  Add the cucumber and muddle that too, but don't turn it into mush.

Add gin, syrup, and ice; add just enough ice so that the total contents of your tumbler equals the volume of your tall glass.  Shake tumbler til it frosts.

Dump the ice and water out of your glass, and dump the shaker into the glass (no straining).  Sprinkle sea salt over the top.  No straw for this drink -- some drinks are better with a straw, but not this one.
This photo may appear blurry to you.  Rather than
impugn my photography skills, perhaps you'd better
slow down on that gin, buddy.

23 comments:

chickelit said...

The cucumber slices are to put over your eyes after you've had 10 of them.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

I have had that before. That is a very good drink. I like your recipe. Classic, clean.

chickelit said...

If you had posed two limes in that photo instead of just one...along with the cucumber...and the knife...it would have been art.

S.C.U.M. art

chickelit said...

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...
I have had that before.

I've noticed -- and I think it's admirable -- that there are very few things you haven't tried.

rcocean said...

Our favorite summertime drink:

Juice from 3 Lemons and 2 Limes.
Tall Frosted Glass filled with ice
3 oz Gin
1 Cup Mineral water.

Trooper York said...

I prefer Boodles myself but that sounds pretty good.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

Chick: I once took a bar tender class. It was in New York, caddy corner to Madison Square Garden (to the Northwest). We made drinks with colored water. Most of the teachers were old bar tenders who were into all the old school drinks. There were a bunch of similar folks and we would go out every day after class and go to bars. We would get slammed. We did it for a week. Best class I ever took.

bagoh20 said...

The photo sure looks like a nasty little party is about to start.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

Is that your photo Chick? Because it looks like a good kitchen knife.

chickelit said...

No, it's Pasta's. It looks like a Zwilling, though.

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

It has that Bob Kramer look...

Like one of his production knives...

Matt said...

Cool drink but do you know how to make a Screaming Viking?

Unknown said...

At first I thought this was the same as a Pimm's cup but that has some kind of soda in it, I think?

Gin recommendations: Tanquery 10 or Hendrick's.

Cody Jarrett said...

I LOVE that recipe! When I tried it I substituted a couple of things because of a supply difficulty. I had to use scotch instead of gin, and maple syrup instead of simple syrup. I didn't have any sea salt so I grated a little bit of my himalayan salt stone my mother gave me for the grill (you know, that pink stuff, you get it hot and cook fish on it). I didn't have any cucumber, but it's yellow squash season in the garden, and we're out of limes so I grated up half a granny smith apple.

It was pretty bad.

What? I said I loved the recipe, not the drink I made.


Meade said...

"Gin recommendations: Tanquery 10 or Hendrick's."

Or Death's Door. But then why waste in tonic such high quality gin? Sip it neat.

deborah said...

Looks great...I'll be right over. rc's, also sounds summery and refreshing.

virgil xenophon said...

As Gin drinks are the topic, ever notice that after the first few drinks one's mouth tends to become slightly parched? To counter this I usually switch at that point to rum & tonic--one can drink that all night w.o. one's mouth becoming slightly dry.....opinions?

angieoh! said...

Gin recommendation: Citadelle. I will never go back to other gin now!

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

Cool drink but do you know how to make a Screaming Viking?

LOL! Saw that episode just the other day.

ndspinelli said...

"Gin will make you sin."

Michael Haz said...

Nice. Thanks for the recipe; it goes onto to summer rotation. My current favorite is a tall Pimm's Cup.

A gin drink with tonic or soda needs a strong flavorful gin to stand up against the dullness of the other liquid. I use North Shore Distillery Distillers Gin No. 6, produced in Chicago by some guys who thought they could make a better gin. They do. Very flavorful, a richly herbed gin.

Cheers!

Michael Haz said...

For low-carbing - I make a low carb margarita. Very refreshing.

Silver tequila, a bit of fresh orange juice, a squeeze of fresh lime juice, club soda. In a tall glass filled with ice. Delicious.

Michael Haz said...

Three or four cocktails and someone might point at you and yell "You bad drink!"