A barn full of mummified chickens, suspended from 20 foot rafters by their necks.
Hundreds and hundreds of them, and all on individual ropes.
30 years ago and I still think about it...
I was driving home a few years ago in a car that was only a year and a half old. It was pretty late and the streets were completely empty. I stopped at a red light, light turned green I step on the gas a few times the engine reeves but the car doesn't move, it sounds exactly like it would if my car was in park, I remember being annoyed and checking to see if the car was in park NOPE in drive. I look up and a HUGE truck runs the red right where I would have been making my left turn. The truck passes and my car once again drives correctly. My car saved my life!
When I was a wee lad, my school was shut down for an asbestos problem. My tiny public school was moved into the wing of a high school for four months during renovations. We were told to stay in our section of the school, but as a lonely child with few friends, I would sometimes go exploring.
Once, I was walking through the second floor of the school and wandered into one of the washrooms. A putrid smell hit my nostrils and I followed it into a stall to investigate.
The toilet was filled to the brim with shit. It was more shit than I had ever seen in my entire life. Logs and logs of shit amongst some kind of mushy paste. And at the top, somebody had stuck in three uncooked hotdogs like little flags. It was like some kind of macabre crime scene from the movie Seven, but with shit.
Ever since that day, I've wondered how the shit got there. Was it one person? Did they collect it for weeks and dump it in? Or was it the work of many? Did a group of boys line up and take turns shitting on top of each others' shit? Who came up with the idea? If they had hotdogs to stick in it, does that mean this was premeditated? How long had they been planning this?
Thursday, April 23, 2015
Reddit: What's the most unexplainable shit you've ever witnessed?
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7 comments:
The most unexplainable shit I ever witnessed was the outcomes of last two Presidential elections, and maybe the next one will even top those.
I mean, I might have an explanation, but it's too depressing to face, so I'm sticking with "crazy shit happens.
This kind of stuff always makes me feel inadequate.
I live such a mundane life.
Appreciating the levity in the tags as much at the post, with the last of the Top 3 stories beating out Number 1 and Number 2 for visuals and content rivaling some of the overly explained shit and lampooning the tagged one has trotted out.
How about good stuff that is so unbelievably good that you never forget it? When I was three I was taken to downtown Brooklyn for some reason that I don't remember. It was a clear cold winter morning and my mother took me into a diner. Everything was white and gleaming and steaming. That's all I remember: the winter sun whitening the plate glass windows and flooding the interior, all the surfaces, with light. It was so wonderful. I've never forgotten it.
Meade
It was so wonderful. I've never forgotten it.
Yes.
Mid-day, mid-March, 1976, I had the experience of being the only one standing at the otherwise deserted pavilion on the American side of the Niagara Falls, during a major snow storm that was dumping on Buffalo as I was driving east from MI to MA. I was 22 at the time and foolish enough to be traveling in the storm and stop there to walk down alone in the snow to the pavilion to experience the falls in absolute solitude and awe. I wondered as I stood there what the early explorers might have felt when they came on these falls for the first time without anything or anyone else around them.
Today, I found one of their responses: "Betwixt the Lake Ontario and Erié, is a vast and prodigious Cadence of Water which falls down after a surprizing and astonishing manner, insomuch that the Universe does not afford its Parallel." The Niagara River, the Franciscan missionary, Father Louis Hennepin wrote in 1678, "is so rapid above this Descent, that it violently hurries down the wild Beasts while endeavouring to pass it to feed on the other side, they not being able to withstand the force of its Current, which inevitably casts them down headlong above Six hundred foot. The Waters which fall from this vast height, do foam and boil after the most hideous manner imaginable, making an outrageous Noise, more terrible than that of thunder; for when the wind blows from off the South, their dismal roaring may be heard above fifteen Leagues off."
Me, falling in love.
Like Niagara, but less controllable.
Every principle, no matter how ingrained, every rule, no matter how absolute,
all tossed asunder like boiling foam.
All remixed and assembled into something completely unplanned and more astonishing than any dream world could fashion even with it's freedom from realities, and yet it is real, touchable, holdable, and capable of drowning a man with a smile.
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