Sunday, July 28, 2013

Massage Parlor Innuendo

I Will Start With the Digression:

A Wonderful Sunday Night, and I Hope It Was Good or Better To Everyone Here.

For Those Who Lurk, or Don't Feel a Specific Urge to Comment, I Suggest Throwing out a TYL on Sundays.

TYL: Thank You, Lem. As In: This Is Your House, Thank You For Making All of This Possible.

To Keep on the Uplifting Sunday-Nite-Time-Zone-Monday-Morning Feeling: Massage Parlor Innuendo.

What Ending of a Book (or Movie, Or -- Possibly? - Opera?) Made You Happy? Still Brings a Warm Feeling?

Those Who Say 'Old Yeller' Should Be Ashamed. Unless it Is Freeman Hunt, in Which Case...


101 comments:

Pastafarian said...

Schindler's List, when Schindler fumbles the ring and scrambles for it on the floor.

betamax3001 said...

I Do Realize I Sound Like a Bad Wedding DJ:

• DJ at a Bad Wedding

• Bad DJ at a Wedding.

I Promise to Make a "Bad Wedding Stories" Post at a Later date - Hold Your Fire.



betamax3001 said...

You Should See Me in My Cheerleader Skirt: I Still Fit Into It. Because I Bought it Two Months Ago.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

Sometimes I get message and massage crossed up.

It is not porpoisely, I assure you.

betamax3001 said...

In a Previous Post I Saw That Orca Eat a Dolphin on Porpoise.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

The catcher puts down the signs and my pitches are usually all over the place. hitting batters. the ump. I don't go big papi when I strike out thought. you get ejected that way.

Baseball metas were against form, norm, the one from cheers.

But now, I don't have to worry about that. Free flow, I can throw baseball metas all the long. just to myself even. play catch solo.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

You saw that eh?

Given that it took place at sea... could it still be called "hot" pursuit?

I don't recall if the story called it that.

I Have Misplaced My Pants said...

I felt warm and happy at the end of Mockingjay. Yay, babies!

betamax3001 said...

Re: "I can throw baseball metas all the long."

But if it Was Basketball Could You Throw Metta World Peace?



Lem Vibe Bandit said...

I do admit to crying at the end and getting that Happy Book Fuzz in my stomach. I did enoy the book, it's just that the trilogy seemed to lose its edge here, without any arenas or Games to make it special.

Also, I hate epilogues. Hate them. I just don't care what the characters are doing after they've defeated Lord Voldemort or they've finished fighting the Capitol. I care about the story, not what they name their children. End of.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

That's sounds like UN.

c'mon.

betamax3001 said...

Re: "just to myself even. play catch solo."

I Fondly Remember My Dad Setting Up a PitchBack in the Backyard for Me in the Seventies:

PitchBack: Framed Netting You Pitched a Baseball Into that -- Theoretically -- Rebounded the Ball back to You So That You Didn't Have To Chase it Three Blocks or Through a Neighbor's Living Room Window.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

Arenas... titus, the architect.

he comes around sometimes.

justagal said...

A great big thank you to Lem for being just a gracious blog host.

And what a line-up of contributors!

Love the posts and comments....some that will stick in my mind for quite some time and some just so fun!

Also loving the new tone that you have encouraged Lem. It's good to see so many people treating each other more respectfully.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

I meant nice beta... I got to remember i'm not alone like George.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

That's another thing. TOP. bad form. or something.

My impression is that TOP is meant to measure what is meant to measure. If you don't measure maybe it has a better chance of existing.

betamax3001 said...

Re: "Also, I hate epilogues. Hate them. I just don't care what the characters are doing after they've defeated Lord Voldemort or they've finished fighting the Capitol. I care about the story, not what they name their children. End of."

Lem: You Are a Blogging Johnny Appleseed, Spilling Seeds of Future Posts Out of Your Pockets. This Will Make More Sense Later.

Karen of Texas said...

Thank you, Lem. I mostly lurk, although I'm commenting more then I thought I ever would... You have made this, along with all who are contributing and many of TOP commenting crew, a very nice place to hang.

And I had a pitckback, too. High flies, grounders or line drives depending on how you angled that jewel. Much better than having my sadistic 5 years older brother play catch.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

I goggle unfamiliar things. sometimes it leads me somewhere else where the texter does not intend. but I have no way of knowing that. ignorance is pain in the ass that way.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

the unfamiliar thing I just googled was Mockingjay.

that quote up there was what I found. goggling mockinjay.

I cant say it any clearer that that. if still unclear its not meant to be.

rcocean said...

The Ending of Star wars is good. So is the ending of Best Years of our Lives & GWTW. Trying to think of a great novel with a happy ending - hard. Will definitely have to think more about that.

Sports -Cartlon Fisk's HR in 1975 W/S; MJ beating Utah Jazz singlehanded in NBA finals with the flu. And "Miracle on Ice".

Karen of Texas said...

Warm, fuzzy endings... Meg Ryan with Tom Hanks - You've Got Mail, Sleepless In Seattle, and Meg Ryan with Hugh Jackman - Kate & Leopold. However, Meg Ryan with Nicholas Cage - City of Angels - not so much. Definitely not so much. In fact, buzz kill was that one.

rcocean said...

Boomer Self Pity party - Play "Bye Bye Miss American Pie"; talk about JFK and RFK and how it all went wrong after Nixon got elected.

betamax3001 said...

Re: "And I had a pitckback, too. High flies, grounders or line drives depending on how you angled that jewel. Much better than having my sadistic 5 years older brother play catch. "

My First Little League Team was a Group of Misfits That Is a Long Long Story That I Will Not Bore With Now: However, it Does Fall into the Same Year as the Movie That I Will Toss Out There (Toss Out There: See? Baseball) for Warm Endings:

The Original "Bad News Bears". Team Loses the Big Game. Team Still Wins. Cliche Made New, Beer, Uplift.

rcocean said...

Liked "The Dark Knight Ending" - I am not an old-fogey, movie-wise.

rcocean said...

I am bad typist though.

betamax3001 said...

Re: "I am bad typist though."

Was 'Bad Typist' That One With Harvey Keitel as a Naughty Police Stenographer?

Anonymous said...

Casablanca of course.

betamax3001 said...

Re: "Boomer Self Pity party"

If K-Tel Records Were Still Around A Double LP Would Not Be Enough to Cover those Highlights (even with the Narrow Grooves and Early Fade-Outs).

JAL said...

Lem -- Thank you so much. I don't know how you did this.

The bloggers are doing a great job. So many good posts I miss some.

Go Red Sox!

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

I just realized something. I missed the topic of the thread. I'm not even close.

Massage Parlor Innuendo.

I liked that guy Caliendo, Frank Caliendo.

He does a raving Madden.

Beta Rube said...

Thank you Lem for this second chance to get together.

I love the ending of South Pacific, when Emile returns safely to Nellie, who is tending his children. I cried at Lincoln Center and I cried when I watched on PBS.

I also happened to catch "My Favorite Year" last night. Seeing Peter O'Toole wave his sword while the audience goes nuts is pretty good too.

Karen of Texas said...

A League Of Their Own made me have a warm, toasty feel. And there's Tom Hanks again. Six degrees of Tom Hanks...

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Karen of Texas said...

Wicked... Saw it in Chicago. Made me cry because yeah, good friends can do that...

Anonymous said...

Another Bogey goodie with a happy ending, African Queen.

betamax3001 said...

Re: "Seeing Peter O'Toole wave his sword while the audience goes nuts is pretty good too."

I Need to See That Movie Again: I Originally Saw it in the Theatre and now -- just by Mentioning it -- I Half-Dozen Memories from it Come to Mind.

And Because Innuendo is in the Post Title:

Seeing Peter O'Sword wave his Toole while the audience goes nuts

or

Seeing Peter O'Toole wave his nuts...

Okay: I'll Stop.





JAL said...

Well for silly cult spin off, I liked the ending of The Last Starfighter.

On a serious note The Return of the King was a satisfying ending.

Another silly happy ending was The Muppet Movie. Collapsing rainbows and all.

I really don't like movies that have deeply flawed "heroes" and people making stupid damaging relationship decisions. Too much like real life.

I Have Misplaced My Pants said...

I know I shouldn't be glad that Suzanne Collins went ahead and gave us what we wanted, which was Katniss & Peeta babies, but I am.

I am sympathetic to the person who said what you Googled there though, Lem. Epilogues do kind of break rules of fiction that I'm not articulate enough to explain but I can kind of sense. Giving us the endings or continuations that will make readers feel warm and fuzzy but don't necessarily fit the tone of the book are pretty much literary masturbation.

Fanfic comes in handy when you want more, MOAR of particular characters.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

Oh, I see. Althouse is back. with moderation.

chickelit said...

Most anything by Frank Capra.

Beta Rube said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Beta Rube said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Beta Rube said...

On a somewhat less happy note:

Seeing the audience tool Peter's nuts with a sword.

chickelit said...

Lem said..."Oh, I see. Althouse is back. with moderation."

Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like excess. ~Oscar Wilde

I Have Misplaced My Pants said...

Oh, I know! The Pillars of the Earth has THE happiest, most satisfying ending. Which I will not give away, because if anyone here hasn't read it, he or she needs to, posthaste. Terribly enjoyable read!

I Have Misplaced My Pants said...

I'm about to start The Long Ships. Anyone here read it?

betamax3001 said...

RE:

"Inga said...

Casablanca of course."

Happy Sad Sweet But Not Mumblecore: Yes.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

It had to be with moderation, otherwise it would have been some mild admission of wrong doing. slight admission... very small. like some of Chips text.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

That logic however could be flawed. i'm just throwing it on the fly.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

I suspect people that want to be on the roster are going to be saying - no comment.

chickelit said...

Admission has multiple entiendo.

sakredkow said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Lem Vibe Bandit said...

What is TOP phx?

betamax3001 said...

1976: 'The Gumball Rally'. Cross-Country Car Race Movie -- a Seventies Thing, I Think. Starred Michael Sarrazin, Another Seventies Thing.

Anyway.

Saw it in the Old-Fashioned Forties-era Corner Theatre in Millbrae, CA. My Friends and I Would Skateboard Down the Long Hill to the Polished Stone that was in Front of the Theatre at the Bottom of the Hill; Skateboards Flying into the Traffic on El Camino Real, on Occasion.

Anyway, Again.

From 'The Gumball Rally":

Franco: And now my friend, the first-a rule of Italian driving.

[Franco rips off his rear-view mirror and throws it out of the car]

Franco: What's-a behind me is not important.

I Like This Freeway.








Lem Vibe Bandit said...

Admission has multiple entiendo.

That is why I said small. I believe, I have a notion, like I said, the logic is probably flawed.

chickelit said...

@phx: Are you saying that Weiner should be more frank with the truth?

Bleach Drinkers Curing Coronavirus Together said...

Oh, I see. Althouse is back. with moderation.

They're taunting the Site-Meter!

betamax3001 said...

People Often Spurt Out Hidden Truths in the Evenings: These are Called 'Nocturnal Admissions'.'



Yep.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

Movie endings. the topic. lets see.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

I'm going to cheat looking at my profile where I list some of my favorite films.

caplight45 said...

The worst Baby Boomer drek movie was "The Big Chill." That was one where you wished the ending had been a surprise mass murder by an escaped Charles Manson.

I like "Field of Dreams":
John Kinsella: Well, good night Ray.
Ray Kinsella: Good night, John.
[They shake hands and John begins to walk away]
Ray Kinsella: Hey... Dad?
[John turns]
Ray Kinsella: [choked up] You wanna have a catch?
John Kinsella: I'd like that.

And Lem,thank you for making this great place. You built and we came.

Anonymous said...

I've read Pillars of the Earth and the sequel World Without End, excellent!

betamax3001 said...

Re: "You built and we came."

See? A 'Nocturnal Admission'!

chickelit said...

@betamax3001:

Nobody likes a wet dream blanket.

Karen of Texas said...

Field Of Dreams... that was excellent.

The Natural was pretty good, too.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

I don't remember endings much.

isn't that convenient?

I don't, I really don't.

I remember the ending to My Dinner with Andre.

Wally went home reflecting on the conversation he had with his friend Andre.

Anonymous said...

Night Sweats and Menopause, a hot read, no flash in the pan.

Karen of Texas said...

Say, there was an X-Files episode with an alien who played baseball. That was a very good episode.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

Betamax said...

People Often Spurt Out Hidden Truths in the Evenings: These are Called 'Nocturnal Admissions'.'

that sounds a lot like Althouse.

betamax3001 said...

RE: "Nobody likes a wet dream blanket."

Was 'Wet Dream Blanket' a Song By ZZ Top or The Smiths?

-and-

If it Was a Song By Annette Funicello Would it be "Sand In My Wet Dream Blanket"?

yashu said...

Hmm, good question. I think, for me, the most satisfying endings, the ones that stay with me, that "change" me (I feel myself somehow transformed when I emerge from the movie back to life & the world), the ones I love most, are often not "happy" ones.

For example, IMO, two of the greatest movie endings of all time:

The Third Man

Nights of Cabiria

James Wood had a nice little piece on endings here. So right about Chekhov: probably my favorite endings in literature. I'm also always haunted every time I get to the end of Joyce's "The Dead."

It's easier to think of short stories with great endings, than novels… I'm coming up short on the latter. Naturally: the short story has a jewel-like perfection of form, in which the end is what makes it, in a way, defines it.

Whereas almost any end to the sprawling novel feels arbitrary, abrupt, artificial.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

Who goes to movies for the ending?

chickelit said...

Time for "Dexter"

See y'all tomorrow.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

When Betamax asked me to play a youtube video the other night, I thought, wait a minute, how does he know that I like to do that?

but the temptation to play a video, specially on request, was too much to reject with impertinent questions of who are you and how do you know that this seemingly insignificant act would serve to calm me. not to put too much of a melodramatic touch to it.

betamax3001 said...

Re: "When Betamax asked me to play a youtube video the other night, I thought, wait a minute, how does he know that I like to do that?"

Lem, I Followed Many of Your Late Night YouTube Song Mixes. Among Many Things, You are a Great DJ.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

oh god.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
betamax3001 said...

Hell, No. Truth, Simple as That.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

ok.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

Movie endings. now. as opposed to back in time.

Movies, the ones that want to make a lot of money are about franchise now. So the endings are not endings in the sense of the end fin finite for ever and ever.

the end now is a temporal proposition.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

the end now is continued tweeting after you die. dead under the ground. you can pay a service to continue tweeting. after you are dead.

look it up on Althouse.

betamax3001 said...

RE: "Movies, the ones that want to make a lot of money are about franchise now. So the endings are not endings in the sense of the end fin finite for ever and ever.

the end now is a temporal proposition."

I Agree. It Is Difficult to Invest Time in a Movie That is Basically Serving as Little But a Coming Attraction for Its Own Sequel(s).

yashu said...

Some happier, warm & fuzzy, and/or bittersweet endings I like:

The Apartment
Rushmore
The Lives of Others
Raising Arizona
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Goodfellas
The Long Goodbye
Rosemary's Baby

OK yeah, I'm stretching "warm and fuzzy" a little.

betamax3001 said...

RE: "OK yeah, I'm stretching "warm and fuzzy" a little."

Warm and Fuzzy is Meant to Be Stretched, Otherwise it Would be Cold and Brittle. I.e., Ingmar Bergman.

Related: What Would Ingmar Bergman Do With CGI?

betamax3001 said...

Good Night to All...

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

Night.

yashu said...

Related: What Would Ingmar Bergman Do With CGI?

That reminds me of this photo.

Que duerman bien.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
chickelit said...

Lem 12:19

Darcy said...

Well, the ending to Pride and Prejudice. The book and the BBC's version of the movie.

Chennaul said...

Man I'm with Lem--I just realized I have a hard time remembering the endings of movies.

So I liked the ending of Inception because it gave the audience a lot to talk about.

Hi--Darcy!

I was just looking at your twitter pics from that mud race you did.

Darcy said...

Hi madawaskan!

That is a fun race. I'm all beat up today, though.

Darcy said...

Oh! An Affair to Remember.

I get chillz. :)

Chennaul said...

That is a fun race. I'm all beat up today, though.

********

It looks so damn fun but--ya the physics of running through that much mud is grueling times four.

Man--I gotta get back into shape.

See that doesn't look boring--the treadmill--ugh--well if I have Housewives and/or the Kardashians on then fine.

Darcy said...

I tripped over a tree root and went sprawling yesterday. A guy behind me asked if I was okay and I said "Yeah. Until tomorrow."

Ouch.

I don't want to derail betamax's thread further, but if you're at all interested in this madawaskan - do it! Even if only once. :)

Darcy said...

The ending to Bridget Jones' Diary.

I am telling you, if I haven't rewound and watch the last few minutes 50 times or more, that would shock me.

"Oh yes, they fucking do."

Yeah. That.

ndspinelli said...

To Kill a Mockingbird. I cry every time I hear Scout say gently as Boo appears from behind the door, "Hey, Boo."

Rocky, to show I'm not gay. NTTAWWT.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

Lem 12:19

I was asking Betamax if he wanted me to delete this...

Lem, I Followed Many of Your Late Night YouTube Song Mixes. Among Many Things, You are a Great DJ.

I thought that question would be putting him on the spot unnecessarily. But, by then Betamax had read it and he responded...

Hell, No. Truth, Simple as That.

Lem Vibe Bandit said...

I delete my comments sometimes because I have to be cognizant not only of how the other person might interpret what i'm saying, I have to be aware of my motives as well.

I want to communicate while juggling those. I make it sound harder than it is.

Chennaul said...

Ya--Lem you are in a really difficult spot.

the only thing I suggest is good people will give you the most charitable interpretation that they can...