Laura Italiano writing for NY Post describes stalker harassing Anderson Cooper as gay, Jewish white supremacist named Hausner. He has long hair and that runs counter to stereotype. *adjusts stereotype* Psychiatric patient from Queens, he has already been told numerous times to leave Anderson alone. Has scraggly hair and wears an X-Men t-shirt. Is a thug, says sweary words. Oh, ex-neighbor says he believes in one race, white race *readjusts stereotype back to default*
Italiano for the NY Post describes Anderson as steely-eyed stud, has posh red lacquered doors and a four-story West Village firehouse, three decades newsman, ducked Israeli rockets in Gaza, a hunky bar-owner boyfriend named Benjamin Maisani, who actually owns an East Village gay bar. And finally, the firehouse is a 1906 landmark, 8,000 sq ft, cost $4.3 million, has a pole, purchased 3 years ago, and he has a another place too.
Goodness.
All that extra lifestyle stuff. Ducking Israeli rockets in Gaza means ducking rockets fired by Israel army. Poor Laura. She meant to say ducking rockets in Israel. Fired from where? That is too much to expect Laura Italiano to know, please, she is more interested in having us know she knows all about Anderson Cooper's boyfriend.
16 comments:
That sounds like Titus.
All the story needs a rare clumber.
And tits.
I Stalked Ann Curry For an Unspecified Time. I Only Wanted a Lock of Hair to Complete My Collection: Was That Too Much to Ask?
ndspinelli said...
That sounds like Titus.
July 28, 2013 at 11:54 AM
Evi L. Bloggerlady said...
All the story needs a rare clumber.
And tits.
**************
Dang it I was sitting here trying to resist making the joke....
Or the other one....
Fudd-C
"Psychiatric patient from Queens" pretty much says it.
Every now and then it occurs to me that I might just as well be a homo, for all the difference it would make.
But then I'll read something about Anderson Cooper's being a homo and how he's supposed to be so very, very good-looking.
And then I'll snap out of it and realize that there's no way I could make it work, being a homo.
That's because I think Anderson Cooper is grotesquely ugly, like one of those Japanese monkeys.
I'm not gay, don't care about the born-stupid-rich, don't watch CNN. And I'm STILL more interested in hearing about Anderson Cooper's gay boyfriend (and what a shock it would be TO THE BOYFRIEND if he wasn't gay!) than I am about whose rockets Anderson Cooper dodged on whichever side of the Israeli/Palestinian clusterfuck he happened to be on during the time in question.
Cooper is totally hot.
And sweet.
And adorable.
This story is the first example of the kind of evidence which won't accrue going forward to the sentencing.
This creams, er screams, Velvet Cabal coverup.
Why is it so hard to believe that Coopers boyfriend would send "people" to "see" this guy? Shit I believe it.
And a "next door neighbor" says the guy's a Jewish white supremacist. Yeah sure. You people know the demographics of Far Rockaway? About 90% African American. Yeah the neighbor's a reliable source.
No doubt in my mind Cooper fucked this guy (or vice versa) and he turned out to be unstable. Now it's time to bury him. In prison.
Who needs evidence when you can plea bargain an unsavory loner?
That's why they should get gay-married.
It will take care of all these messy problems.
Trying my best to be open-minded about this whole homo thing, I did my level best to masturbate while fantasizing about Anderson Cooper.
I worked at it, and worked at it, and eventually I managed to get him down on his hands and knees getting drilled from behind by a black guy.
But it was no use.
Just when it mattered most, in my mind, Anderson Cooper disappeared and he was replaced by Sandra Avila Beltran doing a shitload of cocaine while getting botox injections and that's when I had to finish up.
Bummer.
ndspinelli said...
That sounds like Titus.
July 28, 2013 at 11:54 AM
Blogger Evi L. Bloggerlady said...
All the story needs a rare clumber.
And tits.
July 28, 2013 at 12:11 PM
ROFL!!! Titus got pinched. HAHAHAHAHA!!!
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