A look back: Laura Bush's Diary

So I was in the sun room getting a bikini wax from Jeb’s daughter when W burst into the room. You see Jeb’s girl learned all about that from the time she was in prison for the drug thing and took up with this hairstylist girl from Oakland and all. Plus her momma worked in a salon in Tijuana before she hooked up with that sumbitch Jeb. She was a shampoo girl and they said she could really manipulate a hose if you know what I mean.

Anyhoo W burst in all hot and bothered. “Laura you won’t believe what just happened?” “What did they take a picture of Barry bowing to the Chinese take out delivery guy again?” “No, Bubba had a heart attack and they rushed him to the hospital…maybe you should give Hil a call?” “Oh that’s terrible W…I will get on the hotline right away.”

Now most people don’t realize that Hil and I have become pretty good friends over the years. I mean she used to attack us and criticize W all the time when she was Senator but that was all political bullshit that we didn’t take seriously. You see we had an unbreakable bond because of the First Ladies Traveling Underpants. When you share a secret that goes back to the founding of the republic you can gloss over little things like political posturing and sound bites. When the rubber hits the cootch you know that you have more in common than most and can understand the other girl’s point of view.

So I got on the phone and after a few minutes I got Hillary on the secret line. “Hil what happened? Is Bubba ok?” “Oh he’s fine that big phony” Hillary said. “He just got himself all excited because he was hanging out with those bitches from the Jersey Shore and Snookie got in the hot tub with him and took off her top. Then he grabbed his chest and they took him in for test.” “I heard they had to put in stints.” “Yeah they put stints in his dick the bastard. The Viagra is starting to wear off and he needs the stiffener if you know what I mean. I am so glad I switched teams.” “What did you say Hil?” “Oh nothing just that I had to root for the dog ass Jets this year. I might have to go back to New York you know if fucking Urkel doesn’t give me something to do soon.” “Oh I am sure you will be alright. Don’t sweat it.”

I went into the library to tell W and his Dad what had happened. Poppy and the bug eyed twat were visiting again and they were hanging out in the study as far away from nasty old Barb as they could. Luckily the Luche Libre from Mexico was on and she was eating chicken wings and drinking PBR in the family room. So that would occupy her for a while.

“Don’t worry boys, Bubba is fine. He just got a little excited cause he was fooling around with that bouton Snookie in the hot tub and had a little accident. But they fixed right up and everything is fine.” “Thank God” said Poppy Bush. “I would have hated to have to go through the same thing we had to do with Rocky.” “What’s that Dad” said W. “Have to sit through six sequels that get progressively shittier?” “No, not that Rocky, you know Rockefeller. Nelson Rockefeller. The governor of New York back in the day.” “What are you talking about Pop” I said. ”I bet there is a good story attached to that.”

Bob Dole calls Ted Cruz a Rino!

Briebart.com by Jeff Poor January 31, 2016

Sunday on a special edition of Fox News Channel’s “Your World,” former Sen. Bob Dole (R-KS), the 1996 Republican presidential nominee, criticized Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX), a candidate for the 2016 Republican nomination, on the eve of the Iowa Caucuses.

Dole ripped Cruz for being “an extreme conservative” and argued Cruz would shut down the government given the opportunity.

Time for a Poll here at Lem's Levity!

If only Lem would install the poll feature. But Lem hasn't had a pole in a long time so I guess we can forget about that.

Anyhoo now is the time for you to pick your favorite Bond Girl:

Pussy Galore

Honey Rider

Plenty  O'Toole

Vesper

Jinx

Pick your favorite Bond Girl and let us know why!

KLEM TV

Overheard at Lem's:

ndspinelli said...
Just like the moon landing. I was teaching high school history after that stupid fucking "documentary" came out that the moon landing was really just staged on a movie set. Many impressionable minds bought the horseshit.
January 31, 2016 at 1:46 PM

link in case the video doesn't load

"Diamonds Are Forever" was a great come back for Sean Connery. My late father believed that all subsequent Bond actors were phonies. Too bad he didn't live to see Daniel Craig.

The film also featured Jill St. John who was more coax than hoax.

"The moon passed between Nasa's Deep Space Climate Observatory and the Earth"

Link to source

TampaRay said.. 2 hours ago*

In case anyone was wondering, the Deep Space Climate Observatory, also known as DSCOVR, is a relatively new satellite. Launched on February 11th, 2015 on board of a Falcon 9 rocket, DSCOVR is in alissajous orbit at the Sun-Earth L1 Lagrangian point. Its mission is to study solar phenomena as well as the climate of Earth.

We received the first pictures of Earth from DSCOVR on July 6, 2015, a little after a hundred days after DSCOVR was launched. In addition to the pic op posted, you can view the dedicated website NASA set up for all pictures taken by DSCOVR. I particularly like this gif of the moon transiting the Earth taken on July 16, 2015.

Bad News? Leak it to a friendly NYT, so they can spin it

NYT: 22 Clinton Emails Deemed Too Classified to Be Made Public

Daily News: President Obama discovered Hillary Clinton's personal email use through news reports

"This Toad Isn’t Eating a Bug. The Bug Is Eating It"

Wired: As larvae, beetles of the genus Epomis actually entice frogs and toads and salamanders to attack them, then whip around and sink their huge, hooked jaws into the attackers, slowly draining the life out of them. When the larvae transform into adult beetles, they get right back to it, only now they dispatch amphibians even more brutally. Like, a kind of brutality that involves snipping a frog’s leg muscles so it can’t escape....

In fact, it starts digesting your [frog's] tissue. But strangely, none of your blood is coming out, and indeed “when you slice a larva open you don’t see it full of red blood,” says Gil Wizen, an entomologist at the University of Toronto. What’s probably going on here, Wizen reckons, is the larva is secreting enzymes onto the toad to melt its flesh. “So you can say that the digestion is already beginning before the food enters the mouth,” he says.

All the while, you go about the life of a toad. You take a swim and gobble up insects. You will not, however, turn into a prince, because after two days, you’re so weakened you can no longer move. It’s at this point that the larva enters what Wizen calls “the predation stage.”

The larva begins chewing more, says Wizen, “and what we see is that it sort of tears tissues from the amphibian’s body. After a few hours the amphibian is reduced to just a pile of bones and just a little bit of skin.”

But this was no crime of passion. The larva is more like a serial killer. Over the course of its development, it can take down as many as nine toads, frogs, newts, or salamanders.....

And like a serial killer, its methods grow ever more complex as it matures. The adult beetle ups its game into some seriously sadistic stuff. (read more)

Via Instapundit

KLEM FM

link in case video doesn't load

She looks like some celebrity but I just can't decide who.

I think there's a secret message in Dylan's song about Trump. Here it is:

She fluttered her false eyelashes and whispered in his ear 'Sorry, darlin’, that I’m late,' but he didn’t seem to hear
He was starin’ into space over at the Jack of Hearts 

Sing along after the jump

Enough already.

So I am flipping the dial to see what there was to watch. There were previews all over the place about a new cop show. It had two of my favorite hot chicks. J-Lo and Adrianna from the Sopranos. So I thought hey why not give it a shot. I mean I like cop shows. Hopefully it wouldn't be too graphic. The subtext was police corruption.

You see there is this special detective police unit that handles Brooklyn. In fact they use many actual street names and locations that I am intimately familiar with so of course that was interesting to me. It had a multi-racial cast. The premise is that J Lo is turned by the FBI who has got her on tape soliciting a bribe so she has to rat out her crew and wear a wire. And she has to betray her mentor the leader of her squad.

They establish that she is a courrpt cop from the get go because in the first episode she uses a throw down gun to make it look kosher for a bad shoot by the rookie cop that she had with her on his first day. He mistook video game noise for actual gunfire and killed a drug dealer  guy on his own couch. Now this guy was a bad guy. A dope peddler and skell to be sure but he didn't have a gun in his hand. The made it obvious that she was a bad actor.

Now another bonus was that Ray Liotta played the leader of the cops. He is always good in a tough guy Mafia/cop role. Sort of like a cut rate Lee Marvin. He has a few pounds and few miles on him so he would be perfect for the role of the corrupt but loyal boss of a bunch of thieving cops.  But then this happened.

Nikon awards prize to badly shopped photo, hilarity ensues

So say headlines that appear in results for browser search [nikon, photo contest, photoshop]

A fellow was walking around San Francisco and looked up into a ladder with a protective railing and thought, "needs something" and photoshopped an airplane and passed it off as authentic, verifying in comments when asked how long he waited for an airplane to pass over just the right spot, he answers, "I did not wait very long."

Hilarity, eh, if you say so. People then photoshopped  other things, mostly Star Wars things into the space where he put an airplane's underside shadow.

The fellow was awarded a Nikon branded trolley bag.

Everyone wants a trolley bag emblazoned NIKON to have rotating around airport baggage carousels.

To load up with Nikon equipment and advertise it as such. To bring attention to itself as something valuable possibly worth having.

Point/Counterpoint

Trooper York: It was obvious that the FOX debate was weighted to help some candidates and hurt others. Why should a campaign sign on to this. Future candidates will have to take control. They have to force the RNC to set up debates that help get a Republican elected. Not one that tries to destroy them.

bagoh20: FOX, and Kelly in particular, did their job in a way that we all have been begging for, and as I've said repeatedly, vote Republican if you want a real press fitting a great democracy.

--------------------------

This article is an excellent rundown of Kelly taking apart Rubio and Cruz by showing videos of each playing light and loose with the immigration issue. She begins with Rubio's videos, corners him with questions, then asks Bush's opinion on Rubio's behavior:

When Rubio tried to wriggle away, arguing that the “earned citizenship” he opposed in 2010 was different than the “earned citizenship” he supported in 2013, Kelly threw a softball to Bush: “Do you agree Senator Rubio has not reversed himself on his immigration promise?” Bush essentially committed the Republican primary equivalent of a murder-suicide, reminding the audience that he and Rubio both supported versions of amnesty—but that only Rubio lacked the guts to admit it.
“...He cut and run because it wasn’t popular among conservatives, I guess,” Bush said.

Bush acknowledged that his position might not be popular in the primary, but with a touch of charming I’m-not-Trump self-deprecation, he urged the audience to read his book stating his case, Immigration Wars. “You can get it at $2.99 on Amazon,” Bush said. “It’s not a best-seller, I can promise you.” When Rubio pointed out that Bush had changed his position on citizenship, Bush didn’t even deny it.

“So did you,” he said.

Rubio seemed taken aback. “Well, but you changed the—in the book …”

“Yeah,” Bush countered. “So did you, Marco.”

She did exactly the same with Cruz, showing the videos, cornering, but then turning to Rand Paul for his opinion on Cruz's behavior:

“Senator Paul, you know how Washington works,” she said. “Do you buy that?”

Paul [said...] “What is particularly insulting is, he’s the king of saying ‘You’re for amnesty.’ Everyone’s for amnesty except for Ted Cruz. But it’s a falseness, and that’s an authenticity problem … I was for legalization. So was Ted—but now he says he wasn’t. That’s not true.

German feminist welcomes refugees: ‘Better rapists than racists’

Link to story

Uh-oh Spaghettios

WASHINGTON (AP) — The Obama administration confirmed for the first time Friday that Hillary Clinton's home server contained closely guarded government secrets, censoring 22 emails that contained material requiring one of the highest levels of classification. The revelation comes three days before Clinton competes in the Iowa presidential caucuses.

[Some emails included] highly restricted, classified material that could point to confidential sources or clandestine programs like drone strikes.

http://bigstory.ap.org/article/e19abf78b6fe43e7b7719f059901630d/apnewsbreak-govt-finds-top-secret-info-clinton-emails

"Five steps to kiss someone without sexually assaulting them"

Washington Examiner: The University of Southern California held a "Consent Carnival" on Thursday to try and teach students how to have sex under the new intrusive and authoritarian "affirmative consent" standards....

One of the booths featured at the carnival was a "kissing booth," which provided students with a five-step checklist to kissing someone without sexually assaulting them. The checklist states that consent is:

Affirmative: We're really excited to share this kiss with you and we're letting you know!

Coherent: We're present and able to recognize exactly what's happening when we give this kiss to you.

Willing: We made the decision to give you this kiss ourselves, without pressure or manipulation from you or anybody else.

Ongoing: Should you come back for another kiss, check in to see if we'd still like to give you one.

Mutual: Sure, we offered you a kiss, but that doesn't mean you have to accept it. Coming over to our table doesn't forfeit your right to say no.

Notice the fourth step, about coming back for another kiss. This is where opponents of affirmative consent stop in their tracks. In theory, this means that for each kiss, both participants have to continually ask, "May I kiss you?" In practice, only the man is responsible for asking.

From the French: Radiation de pavillon

So I like to think I helped a man today better understand a pair of refurbished boats he is in the process of acquiring on behalf of his employer back in Europe. That man is a Frenchman, boat Capitan, who for the last ten years or so, has lived in the Dominican Republic, where he learned to speak Spanish more fluently. The Frenchman spoke little to no English.

Once the boats are finished, the Frenchman's employer is taking them to Morocco. The boats were originally from Panama. The job of refurbishing them has taken several years.

I spent the better part of the day going over the systems with the Frenchman and the electrical systems builder. I was not much help there, I must admit. It helped that the 70 year old Frenchman has spent most of life on fishing boats. So he was already well acquainted with what most of what the equipment does, except for some fancy electronics installed on one of the boats. We are going over those again on Monday.

The biggest glitch, however, was trying to explain to the boat builder what the Frenchman was talking about when he said he is going to need a "radiation de pavillon" (French).

The boat builder insisted that a certified "bill of sale" written on a form provided by the US coast guard was all he has given to new boat owners he has sold boats to for years.

The Frenchman insisted that Morocco would not register the boats without the "radiation de pavillion". After awhile, I kind of figured they weren't getting anywhere, so I told them I would look into where and how the Frenchman could obtain his precious "radiation de pavillon".

Trump raises $6 million for veterans charities while FOX Newsbunnies set up hit job on Republican Primary Candidates.

Well that about as predicted. Donald Trump had a very successful rally for which he raised $6 for various Veterans charities. Trump himself is giving a million. Here is a list of the charities. Of course if the news media would do their jobs they will make sure that these charities actually get their money. They won't follow up. Or if they do and the charities do get the money they will never publicize it. They are the most corrupt institution in America bar none.

It was a very interesting event. Huckabee and Santorum showed up to support the cause of veterans affairs. There was a moving speech by wounded Green Beret Staff Segarent John Wayne Walding who spoke about the terrible problem of suicide among veterans. Someone who would never get a platform in the main stream media. I mean he is not a Muslim extremist complaining about phony hate crimes or an illegal immigrants crying about the fact that they don't get everything on a silver platter as they steal Americans Jobs and clog our social services safety net.

FOX News illustrated this point of their own innate corruption by the hit job they set up in this debate. They cooked the books by running attack videos against Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio. I guess they wanted to bring them down. They didn't do squat to Jeb or any of the other midgets still in the race, I can only imagine what ambush videos they had set up for Trump.

I know that they had set up some "Youtube Activists" to ask questions. As though a Muslim extremist, illegal immigrant and apologist for the Ferguson riots are appropriate people to ask questions at a Republican Primary event. Are there Right to Life or  Western Land Use rebels invited to the Democratic Debate. Oh wait. The Democrats will not even appear on Fox News. Hmmmm.

I think we have to totally change the debate format. The idea of debates is for candidates to debate the issues and not attack each other. That is what campaign commercials are for. The pundits all bitched and moaned that there couldn' be a substantive debate without the Trump sideshow. That the Donald is a clown and serious questions need to be answered about substantive issues. How did they do with that? The horse race aspect that the media is obsessed with is just a joke. It was obvious that the FOX debate was weighted to help some candidates and hurt others. Why should a campaign sign on to this. Future candidates will have to take control. They have to force the RNC to set up debates that help get a Republican elected. Not one that tries to destroy them.

KLEM FM

Jimi Hendrix - Like A Rolling Stone HD by link to original 

This was Hendrix's American stage debut as The Experience. The Monterrey Pop Festival in June 1967 came only a few short months after his debut in England. This song was his first tribute to Bob Dylan.* Dylan had been invited to the Monterrey festival but declined for who knows what reason(s). Jimi's reference to "Bob Dylan's grandma over there" was a dig at bassist Noel Redding who sported "granny glasses" and a dylan-esque afro. The two never did get on together and Hendrix ultimately replaced Redding with Billy Cox who is the last surviving bandmate.
__________________
* The second one being his recording of "All Along The Watchtower" a year later. 

"San Francisco park reopens with city’s first outdoor urinal"

NY Post: San Francisco’s iconic Dolores Park is now home to the city’s first open-air urinal, the latest move to combat the destructive scourge of public urination in the City by the Bay.

The cement circular urinal is out in the open, though plants and a screen offer some privacy. It’s a welcome addition for the park that had just three toilets, which led many to relieve themselves in bushes and on buildings.

“Honestly, we were ready to go pee anywhere,” San Francisco-resident Aaron Cutler said told KNTV. “So any facility is better than none.”

"Forget Cat Videos: YouTube is Powered by Schadenfreude"

Acculturated:  Acting out in public means always having to say you’re sorry — at least if your actions are captured on video and posted online. (video at the link)....

She got drunk; she had a public tantrum. She launched an unprovoked attack on a man who was just trying to do his job. It’s hard not to sympathize with those who argue that this form of digilante justice offers swift, sure punishment to the entitled and badly behaved. We’ve replaced the public stocks in the town square with YouTube video shaming, a harsh but effective form of justice.

Ramkissoon at least had the opportunity to try to redeem herself by offering a nationally broadcast apology (she appeared on Good Morning America and declared, “I’m ashamed”; one imagines that had she not been a privileged medical resident, she’d have been giving that interview from the county jail, not across a table from George Stephanopoulus, but no matter).

And yet, those of us who film and watch these meltdowns aren’t entirely without fault either. YouTube is powered by schadenfreude, and ours is an era that has embraced a new voyeuristic bystander effect that encourages us to watch the shameful acts of others while reassuring ourselves that we would never do such a thing.

Perhaps we wouldn’t, but let he who has never had a bad day and said regrettable things in public cast the first stone.

Ramkissoon will soon fade from public memory, to be replaced by the next rude person unfortunate enough to have his or her behavior captured by a phone. But what shouldn’t fade is this question: Is this the kind of justice we want to encourage, one that rejects empathy for immediacy and forgiveness for shaming?

Political survey by former Rep. John LeBoutillier (R-N.Y.) The Hill

LeBoutillier wrote his summation of the political landscape that I found particularly irritating for it being so late. So behind. It sounded to me while reading it like a Republican version of VOX, the explainers, laying it all out in bullet points as if each one is unique insight and never brought together like this while in fact each one is already discussed at length often across several posts right here. Thanks, Late Guy, for the review.

But before that, a few new things not included that contribute to his case. Last night on CNN Anderson Cooper said of Iowa a few times "this is the center of the political universe" in front of a screen split four ways, one with Hillary and another with Bill Clinton.

Not mentioned is Bill is not drawing the crowd he once did even up to recently, and Hillary's crowds have shrunk as well. While Chelsea is reported hosting her own separate fundraising, an attempt that was later reported a blow out.

Slowest guy in the class explains things here, at this late juncture 27 utterly vapid points incredibly late to realization. It's actually funny. Read it and have a good mock.

Apologies for slipping in between two scheduled posts, but it's minor.

"Can YOU solve the 'hardest puzzle in the world'?"

"30,000 people have submitted entries to British intelligence service's Christmas teaser with NO correct answers"

gun buyback program

I did not catch this during the debate. I did catch a few good moments, especially from Chris Christie a couple of times, and I did see more nattering than I care for, especially between Bush and Rubio and between Rubio and Cruz. Kasich, I can't even. And as for CNN, that was mostly about the debate itself with such gems as Bob Beckel saying both Bernie Sander and Trump have the college crowd enthusiastic so now it's just a matter of ... wait for it ... wait for the stunning eclat of Beckel ... turnout.

Beckel for the win, among much more of the same astute analysis.

But between switching back and forth I did not hear mention of gun buyback program. This is a terrible argument to make against it, nice try but a terrible example to choose from the type of analogy. I see the remark is favored 29 times. That means at least 31 people do not hear the immediate stopping reply.

Pop quiz!

What will a liberal familiar with standard liberal tropes snap back at this?

FOX-Comcast Republican debate

Ted Cruz has to dominate this debate

Everyone complains that he is a nasty putz.

But I am sure that underneath it all he is a nice guy.

Because after all he is a Canadian.

You hoser!

Overheard: Amartel

Amartel:

"[C]andidacy is about...persuasion. Reps are constantly caught in the cross-hairs of the Dem Media, looking mean and/or stupid when faced with sad refugee children, widows, orphans, devoted old gay couples who can't get married. etc etcetcetcetc. The list never ends because, of course, the victim parade is politically expedient and opportunistic. Of course it's not fair, but it is the reality. THEREFORE, effective Rep candidates MUST be able to deal with this effectively, turn it around, spin it on its ass (including but not limited to pointing out how obviously political and opportunistic and infinite the Dem party's interest in their victimhood is), argue the facts and the law, and do it with consummate ease, and (IMHO) without looking like a holy roller or some other nut...I'm advocating for an effective presentation of actual conservatism. Yes we can."

Josh Marshall, TPM:

"...[I]ntra-Republican political battles are really about demonstrating dominance - not policy mastery or polling leads but a series of symbols and actions that mark the dominating from the dominated.

...Trump doesn't apologize. He hurts people and they go away. He says things that would kill a political mortal (ban members of an entire religion from entering the country) and yet he doesn't get hurt. Virtually everything Trump has done over the last six months, whether it's a policy proposal or personal attack, has driven home this basic point: Trump is strong. He does things other people can't.

This is why Trump has so shaken up and so dominated the GOP primary cycle, at least thus far. As I've said, this kind of dominance symbolism is pervasive in GOP politics. It's not new with Trump at all. Most successful Republican politicians speak this language. And yet somehow for most it is nonetheless a second language. But it's Trump's native language. I still believe it's rooted in the mix of the hyper-aggressive New York real estate world, his decades of immersion in the city's febrile tabloid culture and just being, at the most basic level, a bully. Wherever it comes from, he seems to intuitively get that for this constituency and at this moment just demonstrating that he gets his way, always, is all that really matters. Policy details, protecting the candidate through careful press releases and structured media opportunities ... none of that matters. Trump doesn't kiss babies. Babies kiss him. He doesn't have a billionaire backer; he is a billionaire. Trump doesn't ask for support. He just tells you that you need to stop being a loser and get on board.

So this debate power play is all of a piece. He can just take the table, flip it over and walk out of the room. It's all about him."

Basic Instinct!

Megyn: You know I don't like to wear any underwear, don't you, Nick?

So for all of you purists who think Trumps Veteran Event is a cheap stunt.......what do you think about Cruz and Carly's repsonse?

So Trump is going to have an event to raise money for veterans tonight instead of going to the Fox Debate. Questions are being raised about where the money is going to go. Which is absolutely right and proper. Charitable contributions often are siphoned away for administrative costs and other bullshit. Trump  has to know that he will be thoroughly scrutinized over this event and I bet that it will all be on the up and up. He is too smart to get caught not producing the money to the reputable charities. I bet it will go to the Fisher House as he has contributed to them many times in the past.

Now Cruz has come up with his own wrinkle. Two of his corrupt political PAC's have offered a $1.5 million dollar contribution if Trump agrees to a one on one debate. Carly jumped in and offered the same amount if she is included. Obviously they really care about the Wounded Warriors.

If anyone wants to call this charity stuff a political stunt that uses the vets well this is even worse than Trump. I mean Trump is just raising money. Sure he is using it to make Fox look bad but he is not holding money hostage. Cruz and Carly have the money but are holding it out as bribe. If they want to donate to the vets they should just do it. I don't even know if this is legal. Can a PAC use it's money that was given for political purposes transform it to charitable contributions? I guess they can but it is pretty low rent to use it as a carrot to get a debate. Of course FOX and the rest of the Trump haters are not going to see it that way. They will not criticize Cruz the way they eviscerate Trump on this issue. It is all a rigged game by the Duopoly.

Comedian tries to buy gun at gun-show without a background check

Link to source story

Full circle

This is a satisfying full circle moment of the Oprah Winfrey type. I'll try to explain why it is so satisfying to see all those red dots.

We were free of school when we moved to Japan and that's the same thing as not having to go to prison. We couldn't believe our good luck in skipping the whole Easter season. The entire time we were at the huge complex Green Park there was no school for us. So the origami package was picked up the next stop. This odd package was opened in a tiny house off base with the oddest bath tub we've ever seen.  I used the book that came with the strangely attractive and precisely tissue-thin square paper, colored on one side only and white on the other. I went through all the exercises in the book and noted their similarities, say, the construction for a frog being similar for a crane. I used the whole package of paper.

The strange paper folding art form cannot be avoided. It's everywhere. I don't think it is possible to end a tour without somehow learning to fold a crane.

The basic form has strict rules. Perfectly square paper, and no glue. Later forms developed from dollar bills and the like, but the basic form is simple and solid rules. No tearing, drawing, cutting, glueing, just folding a square.

You can buy a kit on Amazon for your kids or your grandkids cheaply. I'm pretty sure they will enjoy indulging the book and learning how to manage the paper.

My pop-ups are very different from origami and they don't adhere to any of origami's simple rules. But that was the start of interest in what paper can do and what books and cards can do so it's satisfying to see all those dots all at once meaning Japan. Although not origami Japanese are still mad over paper and mad for pop-ups. They display Western pop-up books and wear white gloves to  handle modern Sabuda and Reinhart productions.

Well, that makes me feel great. Somebody is learning from me whence I was taught. *glows* I cannot be the only one this sort of thing happens to. Even Oprah Winfrey has a word for it. Please, tell us what happened with you.

"Former TV Personality 'Mr. Wonder' Arrested After Nearly 4 Decades on Child Sex Abuse Charges"

Link to CNN coverage

Two photos of Frank Selas, also known as "Mr. Wonder"

Remembering the Challenger Disaster

Do you remember what you were doing 30 years ago today, when you heard the shuttle had exploded?

"10 Financial Choices You'll Regret in 10 Years"

Credit.com: Life is full of financial decisions, some simple, some complex, but all with the potential to make a real impact on your life. In a decade, your world can look quite a bit different than it is today – all because of these decisions.

Today I'd like to focus on some financial choices you're likely to regret in 10 years. I'd like to save you from the pain, the chaos and the heartache that occurs when people make these decisions.

Put these on your not-to-do list. You'll be glad you did.

10. Letting Recurring Expenses Rule Your Budget

Have a high smartphone bill? Paying too much for garbage service each month? How about that cable TV bill – how many channels do you have that you don't really watch?

9. Not Getting on the Same Financial Page With Your Spouse

If you want to crash and burn financially, not getting on the same page with your spouse about money is a surefire way to do it.

When you got married, you became one – one in purpose.

8. Putting Retirement on the Back Burner

Saving for retirement is critical. If you're trusting Social Security to be your sole source of income, think again. It's not likely that you'll be able to maintain your lifestyle with Social Security benefits alone. If you would be able to, congratulations, you're living pretty frugally!

7. Ignoring Your Insurance Options

If you were to die right now, would your family be financially OK? If not, you may need life insurance.

6. Letting Hubris Get in the Way of Smart Investing

If you're not a financial professional or haven't been exposed to financial education, you really can make some huge mistakes by going it alone. That's not to say some people can't do it, but you may regret it down the road when you try to short a stock (a move that the pros make) and end up losing a huge amount of money. Investing in your own financial education by at least meeting with an adviser, however, is smart.

5. Buying a New Vehicle When You Can't Afford It

Vehicles are important for many people, but they can also become a discretionary black hole. If you are planning on buying or leasing a vehicle when you know you don't have the money, please don't.

4. Neglecting Your Emergency Fund

Emergency funds help protect you from the inevitable. You're going to have a financial setback at some point. It could be a few hundred dollars, or a few thousand.

3. Buying a Financial Product Without Doing Your Homework

I know a woman who paid more than $3,500 in variable annuity fees and didn't even know it. Don't think it can't happen to you.

2. Not Paying Off Credit Card Balances Every Month

Credit card debt can pile up fast. If you're not paying off your credit cards every month, you should start. The interest on credit cards can divert money from other important goals like buying a home or saving for retirement. (You can make a credit card payoff plan using this calculator.)

1. Waiting to Start a Budget

Have you procrastinated on starting a budget? It's time to sit down and get your spending under control.

The beautiful thing about a budget is that it not only keeps you on track with your spending, but it tells you what you should feel free to spend. Have you ever eyed a triple-scoop ice cream cone and thought to yourself, "You know what, I'm not sure I should buy this – perhaps I'm spending too much money on little things."

No more, my friend. No more. When you have a budget, you know how much you can spend and still be OK.

The long-term benefits of having a budget are incredible.

"Danish teen fought off her attacker - now she'll face fine"

The Local DK: The girl was able to save herself from further assault by using pepper spray on the attacker, but now she may be the one who ends up in legal trouble.

“It is illegal to possess and use pepper spray, so she will likely be charged for that,” local police spokesman Knud Kirsten told TV Syd.

Numerous readers wrote in the comments section on TV Syd’s story about the incident that they would be willing to pay the girl’s fine, which will most likely be 500 kroner.

The man who attacked the 17-year-old fled from the scene and has not been charged.

Sexual assaults have been in the news in Sønderborg recently after several women in the town reported earlier this month that they sometimes feel harassed by the aggressive behaviour of some male asylum seekers and refugees at the local asylum centre.

Via Instapundit...

Update, from the BBC ... Sweden 'to expel up to 80,000 failed asylum-seekers'

One lump, or two?

"One more cup of coffee for the road
One more cup of coffee 'fore I go
To the valley below"

Tielman Brothers

Indonesian rock, Dutch East Indies, Dutch Indo, the first of its type to break internationally. Popular in Holland and then Europe and then Australia in the late 50's onward. The last of the brothers passed 2014. 

Their Wikipedia page.

I wanted to show a video that blows my mind but it cannot be displayed here. The Beginning of the End is the video title of the song Funky Nassau with the dancers of Soul Train busting their moves in pairs and they are very entertaining to watch. The fashion is outrageous and the shoes quite incredible. One young woman dancer kicks high as her head toward the camera, had the strap broken on her heavy white clog shoe and it flung, it would kill you. Among them, an older couple dances smoothly, others acrobatically, we see the incipient moves of break dancing and robot moves and all sorts of moves being busted in sequence. 

Scientist Shoot at Himself Underwater to Prove a Point

Link to story

Look who gets to question the GOP candidates tomorrow

This is noticed among Michelle Malkin's recent Twitter messages.  She has a couple of posts up on the subject linking to her own writing on Conservative Review.

Malkin is pointing out that FOX has invited guests to ask the candidates questions. Among the invited guests are an illegal immigrant activist and Muslim activist, both with YouTube accounts stating their positions. 

She also points out all this is fine with RNC. 

The debate is FOX-Google. Google owns YouTube. Three YouTube stars are invited. 

Dulce Candy who entered the U.S. illegally from Mexico and Nabela Noor an outspoken Muslim activist are the two individuals that Malkin insists does not make sense for Republicans to accept offering questions, and why FOX and RNC would agree to cohost with Google is inexplicable. 

Democrats would never accept anything like this. Republicans do. Republicans are confident they can handle any sabotage tossed them. 

The main stream media values?

Hee!

A tale of two tapes:

Teen Cruz vs. Terror-Coddler Obama, is how Michelle Malkin titles her post, presently front page on her site, that contrasts media's two conflicting obsessions, that are not conflicting when viewed as politically motivated and not journalistically motivated.

It is a familiar complaint rehashed with a new example of Ted Cruz bragging as a teen about world domination that supporters find cute and detractors find terrible.

This is Michelle Malkin's concluding paragraph:

This is transparency, liberal media-style: Teen Cruz video goes viral. Terror-coddler Obama video gets deep-sixed. As always, selective media coverage of our politicians’ pasts reveals more than it conceals. 

After all that, I think she intended the reverse, conceals more than reveals.

Or reveals even more about themselves by what it conceals when contrasted with what it chooses to reveal, but that summation is insufficiently pithy.

Cuckservative Candy Crowley revealed to be a "Chubby Chaser" (as tweeted by Ivanka Trump)

Bleeding Cuckservative Candy Crowley Clone Megyn Kelly has doubled down on her battle with Donald Trump. After hosting an anti-Trump Festivus gathering featuring the clown car kids from the National Review....the Fox "Journalist"  and swimsuit model decided to show her true colors by having Michael Moore as her guest. To give her a tongue bath for doing the work of the duopoly. As reported on Briebart:

As though the gods smile on The Donald, just a few hours after the world came crashing down on The Mighty Fox, left-wing filmmaker Michael Moore made an already-scheduled appearance on “The Kelly File,” and it was an unmitigated disaster.

After the August debate, I actually defended Kelly’s questioning of Trump. My rationale was that Kelly, unlike the rest of the mainstream media, is tough on everyone — right and left alike. Presidential candidates should be asked tough questions. As long as the questioner isn’t biased in favor of one side or another, nothing should be off-limits.  As Kelly played kissy-face with Moore last night, I started to feel like a fool for defending her.

Moore isn’t some run-of-the-mill celebrity pitching his latest blockbuster. He is an anti-American propagandist, a fabulously wealthy hypocrite, and a degenerate liar. Under normal circumstances, it would be nauseating to watch Kelly giggle, joke, softball, and get all chummy with this cretin. The fact that she did so in the wake of Trump’s charges of bias showed an extraordinary lack of judgment.

ee cummings on Abe Vigoda

it is funny, you will be dead some day.
By you the mouth hair eyes,and i mean
the unique and nervously obscene

need;it’s funny.  They will all be dead

knead of lustfulhunched deeplytoplay
lips and stare the gross fuzzy-pash
—dead—and the dark gold delicately smash….
grass,and the stars,of my shoulder in stead.

It is a funny,thing.  And you will be

and i and all the days and nights that matter
knocked by sun moon jabbed jerked with ecstasy
….tremble (not knowing how much better

than me will you like the rain’s face and

the rich improbable hands of the Wind)

"Video suggests Clinton shared info that 'would never be on an unclassified system' normally"

Fox News: In the [2013] video, veteran diplomat Wendy Sherman reveals that in the interest of speed, Clinton and her aides would share information that "would never be on an unclassified system" normally.

"Now we have BlackBerrys, and it has changed the way diplomacy is done," Sherman, who was undersecretary of state at the time, said in the 2013 on-camera remarks. "Things appear on your BlackBerrys that would never be on an unclassified system. But you're out traveling, you're trying to negotiate something. You want to communicate with people, it's the fastest way to do it."

Clinton's use of a personal server for her official emails during her time as secretary of state is now being reviewed by the FBI.

However, another Fox News report suggests how the FBI and the Justice Department may be setting the stage to make the Hillary email problem go away. See if you can pick up on what I mean.

The FBI is going straight to the source in its investigation of classified emails that crossed Hillary Clinton’s personal server, speaking with the intelligence agencies – and in some cases, the individuals – that generated the information, two intelligence sources familiar with the probe told Fox News.

Investigators are meeting with the agencies and individuals to determine the classification level in the emails. The step speaks to the diligence with which the bureau is handling the investigation, despite the former secretary of state’s claims that the matter boils down to a mere interagency dispute.

The way I interpret that is FBI investigators are going to leave it up to career intelligence staff/personnel to let Hillary off the hook. Will they say they made mistakes and fall on their sword? It would not be the first time people show extraordinary willingness to cover up for the Clintons.

Me likey

"People tell me it’s a sin
To know and feel too much within
I still believe she was my twin, but I lost the ring
She was born in spring, but I was born too late
Blame it on a simple twist of fate"

"New York City To Allow Public Urination, So Minorities Can…"

From Craine’s New York:

Urinating and drinking in public would no longer be treated as crimes under a package of bills New York’s City Council will consider to ease enforcement of quality-of-life offenses that lawmakers say clog the courts and have been disproportionately enforced against minorities.

The council scheduled a Jan. 25 hearing on the proposed laws, which are supported by Council Speaker Melissa Mark-Viverito, a majority of her 50 colleagues and Police Commissioner Bill Bratton. The proposal would remove the possibility of permanent criminal records for public urination and violating park rules, mostly treating them as civil offenses, along with public drinking, littering and excessive noise.

Such low-level offenses have left the city with more than 1.2 million active warrants, according to a fact sheet distributed by the council Wednesday.

According to the New York Times, one liberal official who sponsored this change noted it was designed to help minorities “reach their full potential.”

“We know that the system has been really rigged against communities of color in particular,” said Ms. Mark-Viverito, who has promoted such reforms and is the main sponsor of the bills. “So the question has always been, what can we do in this job to minimize unnecessary interaction with the criminal justice system, so that these young people can really fulfill their potential?”

Trump threatens to boycott Fox News debate if Megyn Kelly not removed as moderator

"It all started last August at the first GOP debate, when Kelly asked Trump about the New York businessman's comments toward women in the past. The question was one of the most memorable of the debate, and prompted Trump to later claim: "you could see there was blood coming out of her eyes … Blood coming out of her wherever."

...Trump is unlikely to actually boycott the debate and host his own town hall for rival networks, as he has claimed he would do. But if he has no plans to actually do this, his ongoing comments and actions toward Kelly are troubling.

How will Trump handle a hostile press if he is president? We know the press will be more harsh toward a Republican president, and that the press is especially hostile toward Trump, so will he just shut them out? And does Megyn Kelly, on a right-leaning network, really need to be public enemy number one to the Trump campaign?"

http://www.washingtonexaminer.com/why-cant-donald-trump-handle-megyn-kelly/article/2581371

--------------------------------

This is all for publicity; he is happily anticipating sparring with Kelly. During the campaign, if nominated, how will the dynamic between Trump and the press change? Now they love to hate him...with reluctant admiration. But later? It would be a delightful brawl.

Lem Update: Got an email saying Trump is not going to participate in Thursday's Fox News debate.

"Sweden Police flee angry migrants as officers try to rescue 10-year-old rape victim"

Express.co.uk: The ten-strong squad of officers had to flee after arriving at the asylum centre to look for the boy after reports he had been raped many times.

They leapt through a fire exit after being surrounded by the baying mob at the Signalisten asylum centre Västerås, Sweden.

The terrifying incident was detailed in a police report and has emerged just days after a woman was stabbed to death at a refugee centre in Sweden.

In the report, obtained by Vestmanlands Läns Tidning, a police officer said: “Even more people appeared behind us. I was mentally prepared to fight for my life. (read more)

moon

The sphere that we're on rotates into the sun from darkness but our backs are to it while we watch the moon instead move the opposite direction away from us double speed by our rotation and by its own orbit around us. We pick up with the moon seen as a hole shot through a blue screen dropping into a purple band and blend into light.

"Mizzou Assistant Professor Click Charged with Third-Degree Assault"

Via PJ Media

The University of Missouri assistant professor who angrily confronted and shoved a student videographer last fall during a campus protest is now facing third-degree assault charges. According to local media reports this morning, Steve Richey, Columbia's city prosecutor, is charging Melissa Click with the misdemeanor offense.

Click won national notoriety last November when she attempted to forcibly remove videographer Mark Schierbecker from the media-free "safe space" that was created by student activists and faculty for a #ConcernedStudent1950 protest. Possible penalties include a fine and jail time.

"Planned Parenthood cleared, but 2 indicted over videos"

Chron: A grand jury convened to investigate whether a Houston Planned Parenthood clinic had sold the organs of aborted fetuses on Monday cleared the clinic and instead indicted the undercover videographers behind the allegations, surprising the officials who called for the probe and delighting supporters of the women's health organization.

"As I stated at the outset of this investigation, we must go where the evidence leads us," said Anderson, [Harris County District Attorney] a Republican. "All the evidence uncovered in the course of this investigation was presented to the grand jury. I respect their decision on this difficult case."

An arrest warrant was issued late Monday; documents detailing the charges were expected to be available Tuesday.

The videographers, who had posed as employees of a company that buys tissue and filmed interactions with Planned Parenthood executives, issued a statement saying they had not committed any crimes.

Young person: People my age think you are dishonest

Hillary: It depends on who you talk to... High School kids support me... we want to win in November. Nothing sticks to me... it's a vast right wing conspiracy.

Twitter, all right wing news sites, late January 2016

"What is the worst possible way to be woken up?"

Reddit top voted answers...

My friends dad woke him up once by pouring a gas can on him. When my friend realized what was going on, his dad was lighting a match and threw it at him.... The gas can was filled with water. Never overslept for school again.

I was sleeping on an air mattress & my friend dove onto the other side of the mattress, bouncing me up into the air. I woke up not touching the ground, weightless, falling. It sure got the adrenaline going.

Waking up from a 9 year coma to find you're in a hospital in Cyprus, and armed men are slaughtering the entire staff and patient base in an attempt to assure your death that should have come long ago.

By an alarm, 7:30 am on a monday morning

For those who have dogs or cats: "The sound of GUH GUH GUH GUH" as your dog is about to throw up all over your bed or your floor.

A worthy effort

"Suddenly I turned around and she was standin' there
With silver bracelets on her wrists and flowers in her hair
She walked up to me so gracefully and took my crown of thorns
"Come in," she said, "I'll give you shelter from the storm""

Commenter Methadras: I rooted for the bear to make it all stop.

Link via Reddits: "the most annoying human theoretically possible".

"The stigma of listening to audiobooks as somehow lazy or 'cheating' needs to stop."

Via Reddit....

As I'm sure for most regular readers and those who aren't, the act of reading a book is a large part of the enjoyment. Relaxing in bed, on the couch with your feet up, as it rains outside and you're warm inside, you feeling cool in an air conditioned living room on a blazing summer day and just being engrossed in a book. The smell of the book and the sound of the pages being turned can almost be ritualistic.

That being said, the primary act of reading is to enjoy the story. People often complain about not having the time to read when I mention a good book. So a little back story, I had brain surgery 5 years ago and while the results were good I've been left with vision and neck problems (parinauds syndrome and double vision) which makes reading more of a chore than a pleasure. So I turned to audiobooks, I've read over 60 books that I've kept track of (possibly more) on Audible and old school CD based books; books that even with perfect vision and no neck pain I'd never have read. It works great for me, I can 'read' while cooking, cleaning or enjoy it like a normal book and lay back in bed or on the couch, close my eyes and engross myself.

However whenever I tell people this I often find myself defending it when they say I cheat.. as if reading is some competition and you only get credit if you physically read the pages. Yes I can and do use my condition as an excuse but I shouldn't have to defend myself because I read my books in a different way.

Reading should be shared, great stories should be shared, no matter how it was consumed.

Top voted comment....

I wasn't even aware it was a stigma. What other people in regards of how you choose to enjoy stories should be of no concern to you, the only thing that should matter is your enjoyment of the story. Read it, listen to it on audiobooks, hell, have someone dictate it to you like Lecturers used to do for Cigar Rollers in Cuba if that is your thing, it doesn't matter.   Just enjoy it.

"Some Migrants in Germany Want to Go Home"

Via Tweet: "Sex, drugs and rock & roll may save us from Islam."

WSJ: “I came to Germany because everyone was saying it was heaven. Now I regret that decision,” said the 30-year-old from Damascus. Last year, 1.1 million migrants—mainly Arabs, Afghans and Africans—came to Germany to escape war and hardship, many of them risking their lives to make the dangerous journey.... 

[M]any who arrive find the country doesn’t match their often inflated expectations. They balk at modest benefits, poor job prospects, and harsh treatment at immigration offices, and voice other complaints ranging from bland food to Germans’ open attitudes about sex....

Abdullah Alsoaan, a 51-year-old dentist from Deir Ezzour in eastern Syria, said he came to Germany 10 months ago with the help of the United Nations to receive treatment for complications of diabetes. Now he is waiting for a new passport to return to the 10 children he left behind in Syria. The reason: After seeing teenagers kissing in public, he said he couldn’t raise his daughters here. “The problem isn’t with the Germans or Germany, people are very nice,” said Mr. Alsoaan. “But they have their way of living their lives and we have ours.”

Others have reached similar conclusions. When Amer found his 5-year-old son stumbling upon an erotic program on television recently, he saw it as confirmation that he would never be able to adapt to a new life here. (read the whole thing)

Darwin awards

I would show this photo to James, a proper electrician, because I know it will crack him up, and say to him with a face that lets no trace of humor, "Lookit this guy claims he's Navy's finest electrician and calls a wall socket an adapter." Bringing attention to an insignificant detail as if that's the only thing interesting. 

Seeing the joke immediately, seeing he's being put on by misdirection, and seeing I'm actually right on the picayune detail on the outrageous photo he suppresses his laughter so completely it could blow out his ears and with an innocent unknowing face made for poker he says agreeably, "Yeah." 

And that's all that is seen of the riotously funny thing that just happened. 

KLEM TV

Overheard at Lem's: 

...is Trump really the guy to solve our real problems going forward, or is he a bomb dropped on a mostly empty target? 

From "How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Donald:"

"Usually with humans it will just stop"

Via Reddit... who finds her "the most annoying human theoretically possible".

Potato photograph sells for $1.5 million

Link to story

Robert Spencer on 5 ways Muslims contributed to building fabric of America

Noticed in the sidebar of PJMedia sites, it is not complimentary and it is short but spread over five pages, clicking through each mini essay of a single paragraph, maybe two, is impressive if the presentation is entirely one sided. Going backwards countdown style, reversed they are basically:

1. the existence of TSA, thank you very much
2. vastly weakened economy, 9-11 was literally a $1 to $1M payoff
3. the existence of the U.S. Marines
4. the business of American slavery
5. conquering Constantinople leading to Columbus

All good points and well explained but not what one expects by its title. Recommended, if only for sharpened polemics.

Policeman in Gainesville behaves perfectly normally, video goes viral with 9 million views

 Twitchy reports the NBC version has the high number of views. This version is from YouTube with less views than that.

Color me underwhelmed. The guy take a few shots and tells them to hold it down. There is no good reason for this video to be viral, but there you go. How odd, a police officer behaving as a normal human being. 

When the kids see the policeman shoot they come out of the woodwork. It's cute. Adorable, actually. The original complaint was about all those kids making noise but we see only two, then boom, the whole area is full of them. They split when the cops came and watched, then came out when they saw it was safe.

So odd, so remarkable that Shaq O'Neil visits the place to congratulate the officer and relive this extraordinary moment with himself in it. How inspiring.

What the heck, he's got al day and his own plane, just go there and play, make it a celebrity healing thing for the whole nation, a healing of racial disunity. 

Eleven YouTube videos on this subject with search [gainesville, police, basketball] That's the extraordinary part, not the policeman interacting normally. 

Hell of a Hall of Fame story

Via Reddit

Thinking Twice: The pro-Trump and anti-Trump perspectives

First the Pro-Trump thoughts...

Against The Establishment

It's a pretty sad day when Joy Reid of MSNBC makes more sense to me than National Review.

Check out her diagnosis (which mostly comes from moderate Republican turned liberalish independent Bruce Bartlett) at 6:45.

It's accurate -- the establishment/elite has been selling lies to everyone outside the donor class for years. They use their power to enact their own priorities into law, while telling the rest of us "it's too hard" or "it will scare the moderates."

And for years we went along with this.

Well, as she notes, the issue of immigration has caused this bargain -- the elites get their actual agenda, everyone else gets lies and empty promises -- to break down, probably forever.

You know, for years, I felt it was my duty to sell these shit sandwiches to readers for the Greater Good of winning elections.

I didn't like doing it, but I thought that, for example, the War on Terror was too important to risk a rupture over other questions.

Although I've come to hate politics and I just despise reading the news now, the one good thing is that I'm liberated from splashing some ketchup on Sandwiches Made of Actual Shit and trying to sell them to people as tasty and healthful.

I feel liberated. I serve no "Greater Good," as I don't know that there's a Greater Good to be served anymore. So I can just say exactly what I think.

And what I think is that the establishment has to be destroyed.

We will not be ignored, we will not be condescended to, we will no longer accept broken promises and lies as our payment for our service to the GOP.

And if it requires destroying the GOP and electing a Democrat to teach the establishment this lesson, to chastise them and to humble them, then we shall do just that, and do so happily.

You will either come to terms, or you will be destroyed.

Anti-Trump... maybe

After a lot of thought and, ultimately, resignation, I have decided to support Donald J. Trump in 2016.

I imagine this will bother those of you who still have faith in humanity, you beacons of hope in this vast, unforgiving universe.

“Why?” you might ask, if you still, somehow, haven’t become a shell of a human being. “Why would you support Trump?”

You want to know why, person who hasn’t yet become a despondent shadow of his former self?

Because my spirit is broken.

I’m so tired. I’ve read countless editorials, opinion columns and investigative pieces that simply, honestly and accurately explain why Trump should not be the leader of the free world, why it might be a bad idea for him to hold a position of authority in our government, why he might be a hypersensitive, raving, narcissistic child with no real idea of how to fix the myriad problems facing our country. I’ve flipped through hundreds of pages documenting his many lawsuits, poor business decisions and general idiocy, pages and pages and pages of evidence that he should never be taken seriously or trusted with heavy responsibility. And yet, his popularity grows; his fans become ever more rabid; and my soul shrivels into a small black hole, engulfing my ability to resist and my will to carry on.

At first, I’ll admit, I didn’t get it. He’s not intelligent, charismatic, charming or attractive. If you close your eyes while he’s talking, it sounds like you’re playing a halfhearted game of Chubby Bunny with a racist 5th-grader. But I get it now.

I finally understand that to support Trump, you don’t have to agree with his politics or believe he’ll save America; you just have to stop caring, give into sweet release, and let the wave of dejected acquiescence wash over you like the incoming tide.

A Trump presidency will probably be unbearable for you unwavering angels of light who still believe that the voters will eventually choose someone else, someone who doesn’t sound like a drunk college freshman winging a social studies presentation the Monday after Christmas break.

Can you imagine seeing Trump’s face, tanned into an uncomfortable shade of blonde, every time you turn on the news for the next four years? Can you imagine hearing his voice, spewing incoherent, uninformed nonsense at you, over and over and over again for roughly 1,460 days?

I used to imagine it and cringe, when I still had a life force.

I used to find the idea of President Trump unendurable, horrifying. Now, I just take two sleeping pills and curl into a fetal position under my desk until all emotion and conscious thought pass.

Are you afraid of what might happen to America, not to mention the Republican party, if an entitled, tantrum-throwing cretin become its leader?

I was, too, when I could feel fear. Now I’m Frodo, exhausted, beaten down, desolate, lying on the side of Mount Doom; just drag me up the side of the mountain and throw me into the all-consuming fire of a future in which Donald Trump can make major decisions that affect my life. I have surrendered to wretched defeatism.

I used to get into arguments with people who like him because he’s “anti-PC” and “outspoken” and “arguably not a pandering, easily corruptible misogynist.” But then I realized that everything is pointless. I used to say things like “we don’t want this man representing America” and “he is not prepared or equipped for this kind of responsibility,” but now when confronted by a Trump supporter, I just lie down on the ground and play dead until they leave or the floor gets cold.

I have been worn down. I have abandoned all hope.

So carry on, America. Do what you want. Willingly march yourself into four years of a president who regularly gets into fights with strangers on Twitter. I will join you, like a salmon swimming upriver to its death.

I will spend 2016 wearing a “Make America Great Again” hat, quietly lying in the dark, waiting for the rapture.

#Trump2016