Thursday, November 3, 2016

the real jonny quest


8 comments:

Evi L. Bloggerlady said...

Did he find a toilet?

Chip Ahoy said...

Fohty-nein thousand yeeeaz

They kill me. They totally kill me all up and down.

Existence there is extremely primal, very close to nature. Every time they're on the tee vee, and I mean every time, they must use one of three words no matter the subject, and each instance the word lands with double the emphasis.

1) yeeeeeeeahs
2) aaaaaah
3) woooootah

Non rhotic English changes your mouth. Forces it to emphasize the places where r's are omitted, to audibly compensate the omission.

Then to compensate numerically the omission, the r's intrude some place else where they do not belong. And to mask the intrusion they're gently aspirated

Party becomes potty and guard becomes god. And Korea becomes career and lawyer becomes loreyer.

Americer
Canider
Africer
Chiner
Angolier
Argentiner
Cuber
Jamaicer
Bolivier
Macedonier
Malaysier
Guiner
Guatemaler
Slovenier
Lithunier
Malter
Zambier

And many others.

Like these:

Libyer
Indier
Syrier
Tanzanier
Tonger
Tunisier
Ugander
Venezueler
Botswaner
Cambodier
Eriter
Ethopier
Burmer
Gorger
Grenader

There's more ...

STOP IT ALREADY you're driving my ears nuts on purpose. You're doing this on purpose! You think it sounds posh to mispronounce them then realize you sound an Appalachian hillbilly and not posh at all, and so drop the affectation on the second or third instance. We catch you at this affectation ALL THE TIME.

Even Milo Yiannopoulos goes "Americer, Americer, America, America, America, America, self-correcting, so that's proof of my postulation right there.

Honestly, I cannot listen for more than a minute, no matter how serious the subject no matter the level of expertise. Within the one minute mark I click off, tune out, shut off, from listening to a flid mong trying to explain something erudite and failing from their speech impediment. It's ridiculous.

john said...

They're really not that hard to find.

Adamsunderground said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Adamsunderground said...

it's true: wherever you go, there you are

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

The ring wants to be found.

Eric the Fruit Bat said...

Speaking of wanting to be found, watched the final episode of Detectorists last night.

Very glad I found out about it.

Thank you AprilApple

Sixty Grit said...

So, has anything changed? Did Wiki leak? Did Dicky leaks amount to anything? Is this story being covered with a pillow until Herself becomes our Queen?